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UN mandates Middle Eastern restaurants standardize on taste of hummus 0
Dumbnews 13.09.11 3:18am
Dumbnews
Communications Union and National Trust agree to merge.

To form David Cameron Appreciation Society...

0
antharrison 12.09.11 10:01pm
antharrison
358-page Vicker's report fails to state venue of next giant alcohol/coke event

UK investment bankers are said to feel "Betrayed" that after reading a boring 358 page report from a bloke wearing glasses to find that the location of the next big champagne and cocaine piss-up has...

0
antharrison 12.09.11 9:38pm
antharrison
Ed Miliband bad for TV ratings

Analysis of recent television viewing figures has revealed that the appearance of Ed Miliband on TV screens is a big turn off for viewers. Ratings researcher Geoffrey Johnson explains the findings;...

0
Mr_Johno 12.09.11 8:53pm
Mr_Johno
Channel 4 abandons filming of My Big Fat Gypsy Chain-gang 0
ianslat 12.09.11 7:38pm
ianslat
'Difficult casting' lands whale with central role in Happy Feet remake 0
Runestone Cowboy 12.09.11 7:36pm
Runestone Cowboy
Kim Cameron Returns to Hero's Welcome

Veteran double agent Kim Cameron - the renowned Toff With the Molotov - returned to his old Moscow stamping ground yesterday to resounding cheers from a packed Red Square. Stout women in head...

0
Drylaw 12.09.11 7:33pm
Drylaw
Slavery Ring linked to Caravan Club 1
Midfield Diamond 12.09.11 7:24pm
nickb
After Deliberation Walliams Comes Out.....of the Thames 0
Drylaw 12.09.11 6:57pm
Drylaw
New Software Deletes Browsing History Automatically

when the comouter detects your wife's car arriving home...

5
Textbook 12.09.11 6:51pm
Golgeau Treize
For every £1 you spend with us, we'll put 30p into an offhsore tax haven says T

One of Britain's favourite high street and out of town retailers has pledged to donate 30 pence of every pound spent in its stores to oversees aid. It could generate billions of pounds in much needed...

2
ronseal 12.09.11 5:56pm
dvo4fun
Merseybeat Hogan-Howe, the Met's new hero

Former chief constable of Merseyside Bernard Hogan-Howe has been named the new Commissioner of the Metropolitan Police. His tough inner city Liverpool background played a huge part in securing his...

0
spoole2112 12.09.11 4:15pm
spoole2112
MET Office denies rumours that there is a storm on its way

"Strong Winds at most" claims MET Office weather men, although Gordon Kayes would be advised to stay indoors for the nest twelve hours. More soon...

0
simonjmr 12.09.11 3:11pm
simonjmr
Michelle Bachmann Confesses! God Upset With Her; Tells Her She Lost Her Mind

In the wake of having reported that God told her to run for President, Michelle Bachmann appeared on Fox News visibly shaken, and announced, “God has told me something else, and it’s something I...

0
LouCipher 12.09.11 2:37pm
LouCipher
French scientists claim nuclear accident is actually unclear accident

French nuclear industry claims the international media have a history of misrepresenting the facts...

0
Pagantroll 12.09.11 2:33pm
Pagantroll
Thames Water announce that 500 tonnes of Celebrities dumped in Thames this week

More effluent later...

0
grottymonty 12.09.11 2:30pm
grottymonty
UK's first Joke Amnesty announced.

The Government has announced the UK's first joke amnesty. Hundreds of embarrassing, cringeworthy and potentially fatal jokes are still in circulation. It is hoped that they will be handed in for safe...

0
seymour totti 12.09.11 2:03pm
seymour totti
New study links excessive blogging to obesity 0
Dumbnews 12.09.11 1:26pm
Dumbnews
9/11 Remembrance events peak with George Bush looking utterly clueless

In a finale to the tenth-anniversary remembrance events, former President George Bush appeared in front of a group of schoolchildren to listen to kids stories, while an aide whispered in his ear and...

0
steve_l 12.09.11 1:22pm
steve_l
Paranoid Statisticians Fear 81% Reoccurring

that any funnier?...

8
thisisall1word 12.09.11 1:13pm
charlies_hat
Feng Shui expert to reorganise banks 1
spoole2112 12.09.11 12:45pm
Ostsee
For every £1 you spend with us, we'll put 30p into an offhsore tax haven says T

One of Britain's favourite high street and out of town retailers has pledged to donate 30 pence of every pound spent in its stores to oversees aid. It could generate billions of pounds in much needed...

2
ronseal 12.09.11 12:26pm
Al OPecia
I'm no racist but we're being swamped by Angles says head ofSaxon Defence League 0
ronseal 12.09.11 11:56am
ronseal
Spokesman for UK banks is a chap in Bangalore called Terry 0
Duncan Biscuit 12.09.11 11:29am
Duncan Biscuit
Banks refuse to talk to Sir John Vickers until he gives them his account number 0
Duncan Biscuit 12.09.11 11:29am
Duncan Biscuit
Travellers defend imprisonment of 24 slaves

as alternative source of income in the event of the value of scrap metal falling, a spokesman from the site Mick O'Mick said "we first got them in around 15 years ago when scrap value was at an all...

0
borednow 12.09.11 10:42am
borednow
Sport relief cynics say David Walliams is simply going through the motions 0
charlies_hat 12.09.11 10:34am
charlies_hat
Archbishop of Canterbury to retire to concentrate on 2012 Strictly 0
simonjmr 12.09.11 10:18am
simonjmr
UK Government To Close Stable Door By 2019

The Government has accepted plans by an Independent Commission to procure a bolt for the National Stable, fit it to the stable door, and then shut and lock the door by the year 2019. However, plans...

0
Awkward Facts 12.09.11 10:00am
Awkward Facts
Daily Mail launches Fantasy Dictator Assassination League

The Daily Mail is launching Fantasy Dictator Assassination League, where livid readers get to spend £100m on buying 10 International dictators, crackpots and war criminals that they think will be...

0
simonjmr 12.09.11 9:51am
simonjmr