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Everything on these pages has been submitted by readers of the site and appears here unedited. Potential front page stories as well as one-liners for the ticker bar are welcome, so if you would like to write for NewsBiscuit please post your article on this submission board and then attempt to give yourself maximum votes over and over again. The most prolific and successful contributors will be considered for the coveted title of 'Writer of the Month'.

Check the following links for info: Guidelines for writers, Writer of the Month, Help with posting.

Topic — Add New »	Comments	Author	Last Comment
Clarke goes up the wrong 'un over his definitions	0	Pinhead	18.05.11 4:25pm Pinhead
Emo Israeli couple to name child 'dislike'.	0	Mr Payne	18.05.11 3:50pm Mr Payne
"Tickin - no it's turkey" Irish PM reassures HM Queen	1	antharrison	18.05.11 3:47pm Mr Payne
Brian May, Roger Taylor and Paul Rogers return to UK after misreading headline All that jazz later...	0	virtuallywill	18.05.11 3:07pm virtuallywill
Fears Olympic torch bearers will be arrested for going equipped to commit arson.	0	Mrblacker	18.05.11 2:49pm Mrblacker
New generation of hardline feminists warns that All Men Are Rappers	0	ronseal	18.05.11 2:45pm ronseal
Pleb banned from drinking Lapsang Souchong in row over intellectual proper tea	4	ronseal	18.05.11 2:43pm ronseal
Most frapists invariably only write half a sentence anyway claims Clarke I hasten to add that I despise facebook...	0	charlies_hat	18.05.11 2:11pm charlies_hat
Children's play area fails CRB check A formerly well-respected playground just off Lacock Gardens in Maidstone has been blocked from working with minors after it failed an "Enhanced Disclosure" criminal records bureau check. The check,...	2	QorbeQ	18.05.11 2:02pm be reasonable
Attempted return of the pony express in Wrexham proves unsuccessful http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-wales-13437279 I know there's a couple of tickers below about this but I thought it would be worth posting up the actual story...	0	Basil_B	18.05.11 1:29pm Basil_B
Tesco press for 'one third off' sentences for guilty plea shoplifters	1	Scroat	18.05.11 1:07pm Sinnick
Olympic torch route 'risks teaching Cornish the secret of fire'	7		18.05.11 1:05pm Sinnick
Number of jobless people in UK falls... as Queen visits Ireland	0	Qoxiivi	18.05.11 12:57pm Qoxiivi
ITV unsure what to call new primetime show where contestants clean out beer kegs	8	Iamthestig	18.05.11 12:23pm Pinhead
Man who took a pony on train says he didn't flush whilst carriage was stationary not many cockneys in wales though...	0	charlies_hat	18.05.11 12:20pm charlies_hat
Man attempts to carry train on back of donkey.	0	Mr Payne	18.05.11 11:58am Mr Payne
Bryant and May demand £500 bonus for lighting olympic torch More ransom news soon...	0		18.05.11 11:55am
Olympic Torch to visit Manchester "a bit risky" admits Lord Coe What with all the rain. Nothing to do with it being stolen. Nothing at all. Nope...	0	nilbymouse	18.05.11 11:53am nilbymouse
'Muscular' Lib Dem Health Secretary announces revised NHS bill In a bid to flex the party's waning political muscle, Liberal Democrat Health Secretary Andrew Lansley has turned his proposed NHS legislation on its head, announcing new plans to retain 24,000...	0	QorbeQ	18.05.11 11:52am QorbeQ
Clegg to defy Cameron over tying his own shoelaces In a further attempt to distance himself from his own utter confusion, Nick Clegg's policy to "disagree within reasonable limits" was again evident today after announcing he would no longer tie his...	0	nilbymouse	18.05.11 11:48am nilbymouse
Olympic torch to be a carbon neutral solar powered LED lamp, Lord Coe announced today. More global warming bullshit soon...	0	Tammy Flugh	18.05.11 11:31am Tammy Flugh
Campaign to reclaim words that have become rude launched by US Judge David Minge American Judge and former US politician David R. Minge has taken a leave of absence from his judicial duties to launch a campaign aimed at "enriching the English language by reclaiming those words...	18	rickwestwell	18.05.11 11:31am butagirl
Queen's Ireland visit delayed by Philip's lack of insults The Queen has confirmed that she would have visited Ireland much sooner but for Prince Philip's inability to think of any racist insults. 'I've wanted to go there ever since the Good Friday...	0	ianslat	18.05.11 8:56am ianslat
Labour Party seeks to extend injunction on all media coverage of Ed Miliband The Labour Party has applied to the High Court in a bid to extend the injunction currently in place on all political media coverage of Ed Miliband. The original nine-month gagging order was taken out...	8	OllieP	18.05.11 8:45am OllieP
Wife divorces selfish opera singer "during vocal warm up he was all mi mi mi mi"	0	brownpaperreporter	18.05.11 7:42am brownpaperreporter
IMF Chief Offered Escape by Hog-Nosed Skunks NEW YORK - A day after Dominique Strauss-Kahn was refused a $1m bail on an attempted rape charge, a military unit from Managuay offers to rescue him for half the price. Upon arrival at the Rikers...	0	RogerAbrahams	18.05.11 7:22am RogerAbrahams
Clegg to continue with gap year in agreeing with Conservatives more next May...	0	virtuallywill	18.05.11 6:49am virtuallywill
Suspicion Grows Over Brown's Role in IMF Chief Scandal Right. I've never tried this before, so please be gentle! Any suggestions gratefully received! ---------------------------------------------------- Rumours are spreading in international circles...	13	Le Creuset Fiend	18.05.11 6:30am Oxbridge
"Ich bin Ein Dubliner" announces Queen on arrival in Ireland	8	Deacon	18.05.11 6:22am Ostsee
Klingon cricket captain Strauss-Kahn bowls maiden over	1		18.05.11 5:47am

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