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US hoped 'Drug war in Mexico would be like Colombia, minus the mass graves' 0
la maga 4 years
William Hague smeared by wagging tongues 3
Insomnia 4 years
Alien visitor eagerly awaits outcome of Middle East peace talks 0
la maga 4 years
Search for knowledge yields 'disappointing' results 0
la maga 4 years
He demanded to know, so I had to kill him, explains manager 1
Oxbridge 4 years

Brian Ford, a 52-year-old divisional director at Reading-based IT systems provider Quantixx, has defended his recent slaying of middle manager Karl Malone, 34, at his trial at the Old Bailey. 'Karl...

'I bet we were set up' says one of the accused Pakistani cricketers 1
Scroat 4 years
Miliband brothers are the 21st Century Kray's claims TV programme 0
simonjmr 4 years
Isle of Man sues news biscuit for prejudicial reasons for being made to feel 4
Basil_B 4 years

second best to the Isle Of Wight. 'We never get a mention' said a random man resident of the Isle of Man...

Pacemakers to be powered by zimmerframe dynamos in drive to increase OAP fitness 0
SingingHinny 4 years
MP's political point scoring to be made difficult due to new bandwagon laws. 0
Basil_B 4 years

A new law was introduced today to ensure all bandwagons will be thoroughly greased to prevent Ministers of Parliament jumping on them to easily. The effects could be wide ranging for many MP's...

Cat Woman defends her actions "TopCat lived in a dustbin for years and it never 11
Sharpehunter 4 years

did him any harm, so whats the problem?" Officer Dibble was unavailable for comment, it is feared that he has been a victim of recent cutbacks and has been replaced by CCTV in New Yorks seedier parts...

William Vague on sexuality 3
Erlang 4 years
Christopher Myers to join the United Nations - likes being in the Hague 1
simonjmr 4 years
Coventry Godless claims Hawking 2
simonjmr 4 years
Spate of copycat killings leaves ferral copycat numbers dangerously low 3
dicky37 4 years

[More soon]...

Hague denies claims of gay sex with aid and his associate Christopher Myers. 0
Basil_B 4 years
Tony Blairs Book:The Journey vanishes from the shelves 0
rosewing 4 years

Despite unprecedented publicity Tony Blairs' new book (which incidentally according to a government dossier can burn in 45 minutes)has vanished from bookshelves all over the Uk . Inspectors have been...

‘New wave’ of terrorists are heavily influenced by Kraftwerk, experts claim 3
Gary Stanton 4 years

Britain faces a new reign of terror from Jihadists obsessed by synthesiser bands dating back to the mid-1970s, it was claimed last night. Intelligence services believe prisoners who are held on...

Stephen Fry resigns from job as top homosexual over rumour he is a tory. 1
the coarse whisperer 4 years
Jesus crucified over unpaid library fines. 5
SingingHinny 4 years

Religious leaders are clambering over one another in the race to renounce Jesus, after analysis of the Dead Sea Scrolls revealed that He had accrued massive unpaid library fines. According to James...

Fluke worms not so lucky after dose of the drug praziquantel. 0
simonjmr 4 years
Professional wrestler denies homosexuality 1
Jaffacakes 4 years

Top professional wrestler 'The Bald Boss' has come out today to deny rumours of an 'inappropriate' relationship with fellow wrestler 'Ring Monster'. The Bald Boss addressed reporters wearing his...

Stephen Hawking says the Universe could exist without Stephen Fry 1
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
Thomas the tank engine 0
john doe 4 years

It was a lovely sunny morning,and all the engines in the engine shed were excited as today Fiolla Benjamin one of the origanal preseanters from BBC1s Play School,was going to take a ride on a carrige...

Ffion suddenly realises lack of children due to William using the wrong'un 0
simonjmr 4 years
William Hague makes a good fist of gay relationship rumours. 0
curry muncher 4 years
More government cost-cutting measures revealed. Minister forced to share room. 0
curry muncher 4 years
Ofgem probes power companies to show them how it feels to be shafted 0
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
Complete Roman brass lantern found alongside incomplete brass monkey 0
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
Allergy Advice: These news items are written on a forum which may contain nuts. 0
Ian Searle 4 years