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BP appoint Toxic Avenger as new CEO 0
ColinSlick 4 years

In a move considered surprising by many industry observers, BP have today announced their appointment of renowned super hero and eco champion The Toxic Avenger as their new CEO. 'Toxie' joins the...

Plastic Bertrand a 'fake' - was acutally Belgian not French. 3
Nick McCarr 4 years

Ca plane pour moi!...

The Owner of a new Pole dancing school in Scotland admires his 2
arrghgarry 4 years

admires his new clutch of students ranging from 5 to 55 ,although he has been criticized he says he sees lots of new openings .It is not just for sexual reasons the girls and 2 boys Ben and Phil...

Ester Rantzen shocked as NSPCC announce sponsorship of Pope's Glasgow Mass 0
shambling 4 years

We Interupt This Forum For An Important Announcement 1
rfreed 4 years

A MESSAGE TO THE CITIZENS OF THE UNITED STATES, Official notification is hereby given by venue of this website to all citizens of the United States that the government of said land is dissolved and...

Poop scoops banned from Paris. 'These would depopulate the city' says mayor 0
Ostsee 4 years
Nursing Homes to close after Govt raises retirement Age 2
rosewing 4 years

Plans to change the fixed retirement age were greeted with cheers last night at Nursing Homes throughout England. Pensioners can now all toddle off to McDonalds on their zimmers to earn extra money.,...

Labour’s got talent leadership contest. 1
Converter 4 years

In a surprising turn of events Labour candidates for leadership in an attempt to attract the British electorate have new plans for the remaining hustings. All candidates have revealed they are to...

Clegg 'clueless about coalition' reveals BBC documentary 0
QorbeQ 4 years

Nick Clegg, taking part in a BBC documentary about the General Election last May, has revealed that he 'still has no idea' what a coalition government is or what he is supposed to be doing, but that...

Man buys motorbike just to rev it up in back garden 13
newbietryer 4 years

Local neighbours have branded a man who purchased a KTM 450 SX motorbike a nuisance. Terence Headman, 28 of Leicester says he has no intention of ever riding the bike., He said, “I just love the...

Anusol advertise on NewsBiscuit after reading 'My ass hurts' 5
Oxbridge 4 years
BP already half way towards goal of being smaller and wiser. 1
deskpilot3 4 years
Young Afghan puppy saved from thugs using it as a football , 1
arrghgarry 4 years

an army officer veterinarian (not vet) said these people should be out there getting blown up or shot ,or even killing people, we don`t pay them to play football with dogs., We`ve got chavs to do...

Iceland Vetoes Bullfighting 0
gjp 4 years

The Bulls of Northern Spain can breathe a collective sigh of relief after the frozen food chain Iceland announced Kerry Catalonia, the munter off the Iceland adverts, will no longer be taking on the...

Government plans to replace ASBOs with Asbestos. More soon. 2
dominic_mcg 4 years
Vince Cable denies that having an Indian wife Indian kids Indian relatives 0
arrghgarry 4 years

African friends and ties has anything to do with his views on the immigration cap...

David Blunkett seeks ASBO against government for threatening ASBOs 0
la maga 4 years
Dog walker finds mass grave of Labour plans in woods near East Grinstead 0
la maga 4 years
Family Pets On The Run 0
Evil Toaster 4 years

Agnus McDonald, 78, was the subject of a brutal attack, conducted by over 500 peacocks. The peacocks were the family pets of next door neighbour, Andy Thompson, 45, who has described the attack as...

Customers angry as ice-cream company sees profits rise 98% over summer months. 2
dominic_mcg 4 years
David Cameron offers new Government post "expert in sucking up " 0
arrghgarry 4 years

the post would involve finding out nice things to say about countries we formerly fucked over before I visit them ,Asked if he had anyone one in mind ,he replied of course Tony is set up for life,...

Uproar in Commons during first reading of Prevention of Hoo-Haas Act 5
afternoonslow 4 years

Theresa May spells it out in short monologue,”We'll have no Hoo-Haas here, we're all cunts now”...

Scientific breakthrough could restore normal speech to Robert Peston. More soon. 0
deskpilot3 4 years
Scottish Prison Service Health Assessment and Evaluation Agency abolished... 5
deskpilot3 4 years

twice, just to be on the safe side...

Picking Apple or Blackberry is like comparing Apples and Oranges, says Jobs 2
Dumbnews 4 years
Arson About, new lifestyle mag for the fire setting community in sizzling launch 24
ronseal 4 years

After a sizzling launch party Arson About, the lifestyle magazine for today's pyromaniacs, aims to set the agenda in publishing. 'Our strategy is to think local, act glowball,' said editor Herman...

After Fat: ‘Straight talking’ to apply across all UK government 2
antharrison 4 years

Following the announcement by health minister Anne Milton to call obese people ‘Fat’ David Cameron has announced that the use of straight and honest talking will extend to all government roles...

ASBOS to be replaced with stocks, mild garotting or three weeks in Milton Keynes 0
Hunter F. Thompson 4 years
Afghan police to be issued with semi-automatic potato guns 'just in case.' 0
SingingHinny 4 years
French infanticide case puts crimp in sales of home-made pate. 0
the coarse whisperer 4 years