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Pope condemns British as "Aggresively atheist,third world condom-wearing twats" 3
Lightbringer 4 years
Freddie Flintoff Retires from Cricket to Concentrate on Extreme Pedalo Racing 0
IABP 4 years

Andrew 'Freddie' Flintoff has announced his retirement from all forms of cricket due to only having one working leg. The injury-plagued all-rounder revealed the decision came after consultation with...

Friends of Cameron say Trident is his "mid-life-crisis missile". 0
the coarse whisperer 4 years
Slightly younger and much more successful person than you is infuriatingly nice 5
jm 4 years

Despite being more talented, successful and a good three years younger than you, it appears that Tom is neither hideously arrogant or lacking social skills. Despite your best attempts to find a...

Pope’s teeth drop out 0
hero2zero 4 years

The incident occurred as he warned the masses of the rise of fundamentalist aggressive secularists...

47-year-old man still convinced his shiny car will get him laid 1
la maga 4 years

Despite decades of evidence to the contrary, Ross Stapledon, 47, of Chiswick is still firmly of the belief that his shiny new Audi is the key to success with women. He first picked up the notion that...

Pope forgot to cancel subscription to Hitler Youth in 1945 2
Genghis Cohen 4 years

As Pope Benedict’s official visit to Britain gets underway, leaked Vatican accounts show that the leader of the Catholic church has for almost 68 years been making an annual payment to the Hitler...

Japan reports five-fold increase in origami, complicating everything. 0
bonjonelson 4 years
Lifelong bicycle commuter says, "Screw this! I am driving" 0
Dumbnews 4 years
Atheism for beginners exam question "Is the Pope Catholic?... discuss" 10 Marks 0
Iamthestig 4 years

19 Lukes and 3 Johns...

Admin mix up for Popes tour causes venue mayhem with club singer 2
Basil_B 4 years

Embarrassed officials for the Popes tour of Britain admitted today a glaring error involving his grace and a part time club singer naming himself Crooning Colin Pope from Burnley with there...

Duke of Edinburgh asks the Pope if he's a catholic. 0
Psycadelic Squirrel 4 years
Worlds smallest cow bred to provide minute steak 0
Iamthestig 4 years
Edninburgh : Pope suddenly remembers he didn't switch the iron off 0
simonjmr 4 years
A coincidence ? 0
Sinnick 4 years

Consider this: Popular cult hero "LambSneaker" (an anagram to protect the innocent, not just a hobby) appears to have left NB suddenly a few days ago. Subsequently, the Pope begins a 4-day visit to...

Vatican clarifies Papal aide's comments 0
SteveCut 4 years

A senior papal aide, Cardinal Walter Kasper, has come under steadily applied but relentlessly increasing pressure from the Catholic church to apologise after saying that arriving at Heathrow airport...

Peter Crouch admits he almost got away with anonymous prostitute sex 0
arrghgarry 4 years

if he had only not done his fucking stupid robotic dance after shagging her...

Pope gets 2 down wrong in Times crossword. Paisley jumps on infalibility claim 0
brownpaperreporter 4 years
George Michael placed in solitary confinement after anal inspection 0
arrghgarry 4 years

by all the inmates reveals he has no contraband for his new roommates .The last time he had been in a soft cell, Marc Almond had been in a coma...

Game shows 'getting easier', say critics 1
Jaffacakes 4 years

Clockwatchers, the government body responsible for monitoring game show standards has come out to defend the industry from criticism of 'dumbing down', amid revelations that this year has seen record...

EMF's 20th anniversary reunion "unbelievable" 0
simonjmr 4 years

The things you say . More soon...

Pope's visit 0
euanc 4 years

Aggressive Scottish secularist invite Pope outside to sort things out - more soon...

Man to be divorced over i-pad love affair 0
simonjmr 4 years
MOD under fire for new RAF order. 0
Basil_B 4 years

Apparently when challenged they could only put down an order for five new submarines as a administrational error., They're also looking closely at an order placed for twenty all terrain vehicles for...

George Michael sentenced for crashing pink elephant into a giant lollipop 0
mattk 4 years

Fans wept openly as a grinning George Michael was led from the dock to spend a gruelling four weeks behind bars with men who enjoy showers. Although having no memory since early 2010, and being...

Pope Accused of Mass Fixing 1
IABP 4 years
kardinal Casper banned from U.K , Pope afraid he`d put the willies up everyone 2
arrghgarry 4 years
Universal order 'in turmoil' as Yin and Yang finally seeing eye to eye 1
QorbeQ 4 years

Following intense mediation sessions brokered through relationship organisation Relate, Taoist philosophical concepts Yin and Yang have finally made peace after several millennia of fierce...

Pope to have deep fried Mars bars, washed down with Buckfast, for lunch. 0
Psycadelic Squirrel 4 years

Papaltations expected shortly after...

BREAKING NEWS: Pope condoms Catholic paedophilia. More soon. 0
QorbeQ 4 years