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Disappointment of would-be mountaineer 0
MrChigleysAunt 4 years

Luke Davies, 19, is having to reconsider his ambition to climb the World's ten highest peaks. Inspired by his ex-girlfriend's comment that he should be a mountaineer because he always goes "way over...

Glaswegian pilot has tough "fight or flight" choice to make 7
simonjmr 4 years
Brown blames poor posture on economic slump. 0
MightyBlair 4 years
Well prepared hunter caught off guard as Kangeroo does Kung Fu. 0
MightyBlair 4 years
Head Teachers protest as league tables to consider goal difference. 0
MightyBlair 4 years
Teacher attack video, pupils thought they were watching Grand Theft Auto. 0
MADJEZ 4 years

Most wondered why he didn't use the mini-gun rather than the dumb-bell. Pupils have criticized the teacher for not using more energy packs and kung foo...

Ricky Gervais's scheduled death by overkill on target for summer, say C4 baddies 1
ronseal 4 years

Evil baddies hell bent on destroying any of Britain's best new comedians are reportedly 'bang on target' with their assassination of Ricky Gervais. The Reading comic is reportedly on course for a...

Slick more dangerous than previously thought 0
virtuallywill 4 years

Brown defends rant at bigtoed woman 3
virtuallywill 4 years

Sandals on the hustings...

'Countdown' presenter 'killed by Nick Robinson' 0
MightyBlair 4 years

The Channel Four programme 'Countdown' is mourning the death of a second long-term presenter after 'Dictionary Corner' mainstay Susie Dent exploded during filming. Producers of the popular afternoon...

Women Awarded 6 Figure Payout After Being Misdiagnosed with Autumn Complexion 0
thisisall1word 4 years
Man's lager spill sparks new drilling ban from girlfriend 0
rickwestwell 4 years
Soldiers killed "unlawfully" - Anti-war protestors attempt to make Taliban legal 0
brownpaperreporter 4 years
Four horsemen 'not that bad', apocalypse 'less of a concern' 2
QorbeQ 4 years

The so-called 'Four Horsemen' have attended a public 'getting-to-know-you' surgery near their Apocalypse Party headquarters in Clapham, just outside Bedford, today. Pestilence, War, Famine and Death...

Tight fitting underwear 'definitely not' cause of erectile, conception problems 0
QorbeQ 4 years

Research shows the exact opposite, with a pronounced 'can't-keep-my-grubby-little-mitts-off' effect present in all but two cases studied. 'Them two birds were proper mingers though, eh Dave?' said...

New Facebook app tells you how odd you are relative to your friends 1
Dumbnews 4 years
O'Farrell doesn't give an UBUK. 1
andhrimnir 4 years

United Biscuits UK have demanded an apology from John O'Farrell following a comment he made on BBC Radio Scotland suggesting articles on his e-zine were "as consequential as a biscuit". O'Farrell...

RSPCA complains as Brent woman eats live whale 0
PluckyMunky 4 years
Blair set to join Labour campaign. 0
Zen 4 years

Can be launched in 45 minutes...

Gordon Brown decides to wear burkha 0
PluckyMunky 4 years
Brown to 'dig deeper hole' before poll 0
fernandomando 4 years
World record attempt for singing in the rain called of due to good weather. 0
Ian Searle 4 years
Royal Mail bosses support first-past-the-post system 0
Zadok the second 4 years

as undelivered mail stockpiles continue to grow. More soon...

Adobe's video response to Apple fails to load properly 0
ED209 4 years

Adobe Systems responded to Steve Jobs with an an initially well-argued case that later descended into a foul mouthed rant. However, viewers were unable to load the flash video, even after rebooting...

Close seconds campaign for change to "pipped at the post" electoral system 0
MrChigleysAunt 4 years
Iran bans Belgian Buns in retaliation for Burka Ban.. 0
Ian Searle 4 years
damn 2
Ian Searle 4 years
Court case paves way for teachers to beat the shit out of unruly pupils. 0
MADJEZ 4 years

Schools notice a sudden improvement in childrens behaviour after teach acquitted of attempted murder...

Car crash TV: Cameron ram-raids Labour poster launch. 0
MADJEZ 4 years

Labour have alleged that the car which crashed while they were unveiling a new poster in Birmingham belonged to the Conservative leader. Lord Mandleson was heard to say [quote]Come on a green VW...

Local council to stockpile curry powder [FOR THE ALL NEW JENI B] 0
QorbeQ 4 years

In anticipation of harsh frosts next winter, one local council has outlawed shipments of curry powder across county borders following reports that a typical curry contains 'enough salt to melt the...