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Libyan pest control reopens as NATO lift No-Fly Zone 2
Perks 13.11.11 12:05am
Survey shows most wives prefer to stay home and whinge about not going on

holiday to an actual holiday...

Nick McCarr 12.11.11 11:58pm
Berlusconi's last decree before resignation, all lamp-posts removed. More Soon 0
reforse 12.11.11 9:39pm
Liverpool to replace Syria in Arab League.

At last a chance of winning a league,say's Dalglish following his failure to win 10,000 leagues under the Sea...

Zen 12.11.11 9:39pm
Papasmurf leads early betting for next Greek PM

With Papandreou recently resigned and Papademos taking control of a temporary government of unity. William Hill are saying that the early money for Greece's next elected Prime Minister is going on...

Immunis 12.11.11 9:05pm
Derby residents confiscate Christmas lights to prevent November switch on

A group of residents from the city of Derby have today admitted to confiscating the city's Christmas lights to prevent the planned November 19th switch on. The date, a full 36 days before Christmas,...

kga6 12.11.11 7:43pm
John Terry calls Fabregas a 'foriegn C**t' as spanish becomes the new black 1
Perks 12.11.11 5:46pm
Britains 'Next Still Life Model' signs promotion deal for Tesco *Finest range.

The 'Meat&2Veg' range to be in shops before Christmas...

Bryan with a Y 12.11.11 5:45pm
Testicle bite woman's relief, "It's been hanging over me for a long time" 5
medici2471 12.11.11 5:22pm
geordie crusada
Pyramid Closed For Maintenance

The Great Pyramid in Egypt was closed Friday, 11/11/11, because it was in need of maintenance. There were concerns that some groups would try to perform magic rituals there due to the unusual date,...

moggies 12.11.11 4:57pm
Coronation Street shock as Gary Barlow revealed as Ken's illegitimate son.

Boring X-Factor anecdotes give secret away...

Bryan with a Y 12.11.11 4:17pm
Bryan with a Y
Vodafone to pay 'token tax bill' on 30th November

Her Majesty's Revenue & Customs have settled a long standing grumble with off-shore tax avoidance and mobile telephone merchants Vodafone. HMRCs David Hartnett has agreed that Vodaphone will pay...

dvo4fun 12.11.11 4:17pm
No more live football coverage, as Premier League sanction Syria 0
Perks 12.11.11 4:03pm
Minister urges public sector workers ‘not to comb hair’ as token strike gesture 0
Clarky 12.11.11 3:58pm
Union urges '15-minute government' 0
roybland 12.11.11 2:47pm
Drug dealing dwarf spared jail as only top bunks available.

Bashful prosecution lawyers were left feeling rather dopey yesterday following the sentence handed down. The grumpy judge was less than happy that one member of the jury kept sneezing throughout the...

Bryan with a Y 12.11.11 2:39pm
Bryan with a Y
Tesco bosses say 'bottoms up' as they toast 'Gay Pride London' sponsorship.

'Race for Life' dropped in favour of the pink pound...

Bryan with a Y 12.11.11 2:16pm
Bryan with a Y
Donkey Sanctuary ‘should have spotted the donkeys were fake’

A Donkey Sanctuary admitted today that most of last year's record intake of rescue animals were, in fact, ‘men in quite convincing pantomime donkey costumes, many of them Greek’. It also...

NewSuburbanDad 12.11.11 1:56pm
Berlusconi agrees to step down for 15 minutes 0
kga6 12.11.11 1:39pm
Russian Mars Probe "Could Be Anywhere".

It has emerged that the Phobos-Grunt spacecraft launched by Russians may or may not have landed on Mars recently. The European Space Agency has said that it is unlikely to be able to salvage much...

mattupchuck 12.11.11 1:00pm
James Murdoch admits "We only employ liars, apart from me, obviously"

James Murdoch has revealed that dishonesty was a job requirement for News International employees. "That's why everyone's evidence contradicts mine.", explained Murdoch...

apepper 12.11.11 12:58pm
Cat swinging man moved to larger council flat after submitting video

More to follow...

apepper 12.11.11 12:57pm
Blair delight as he brokers peace deal between Confucius and Simple Simon.

The father of Brit-Pop could hardly contain himself today, as his role in the ongoing dispute between Confucius and Simple Simon was made public. Leaked police files from North Yorkshire Police...

Bryan with a Y 12.11.11 12:55pm
Bryan with a Y
Pensioners cheer as they finally return to 'the good old days'; cold and poor.

Age Concern yet to confirm victory...

Bryan with a Y 12.11.11 12:24pm
Bryan with a Y
X-Factor rapped over discarded johnny. 0
MADJEZ 12.11.11 11:56am
Berlusconi to resign definitely soon perhaps maybe...unless he changes his mind. 0
MADJEZ 12.11.11 11:53am
Veterans seek assurances Easter Bunny will wear a poppy next year 2
12.11.11 11:46am
Olive Oyl fury as veterans continue to muscle in on her annual Popeye appeal

Negotiations continue...

Bryan with a Y 12.11.11 11:43am
Bryan with a Y
Christmas Lights deny being turned on by Justin Bieber. 1
Zadok the second 12.11.11 10:42am
Vertically Challenged Giant
Chaos in Chelsea dressing room after sponsor Mobius provides new strips. 0
dominic_mcg 12.11.11 10:00am