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Ring found in canal belongs to Street Doctor

Dr Christian Jessen was celebrating last night after his gold sygnet ring was recovered from the alimentary canal of a Street Doctor patient in Birmingham. After filming at the Birmingham location...

Dick Everyman 02.07.11 4:36pm
Dick Everyman
Truth In Advertising Standards Force Cameron To Rephrase "The Big Society" Theme

..Now to be billed as "The Candyfloss Economy."...

Jesse Bigg 02.07.11 3:41pm
Jesse Bigg

Six holiday makers annoyed the owner of their Spanish hotel this week by not smashing the place up in drunken brawls, by not throwing up in hallways, or by having sex in elevators. The lack of...

victimms 02.07.11 1:56pm
Friction breaks out over annual "Murray reverts to being Scottish" joke

A bitter war of words has broken out over which of two NewsBiscuit stalwarts had the right to dredge up the usual "Andy Murray reverts to being Scottish" joke, which has been sighted every year since...

Bwahahahaha 02.07.11 11:33am
Psycadelic Squirrel
Murray chokes harder than Michael Hutchence 0
Christopher Frost 02.07.11 10:40am
Christopher Frost
Strauss-Kahn tipped as next Pope 0
roybland 02.07.11 10:32am
Slackers launch new charity “Sickie” for sufferers of minor ailments

Hypochondriacs and workplace slackers across the UK have united to form Sickie, a new charitable foundation for the millions of British people, of whom 97% are male, who suffer in almost silence from...

antharrison 02.07.11 9:40am
Chelsea Pensioners must work until 103

Under the Government's latest austerity measures, Chelsea pensioners will have to work until the age of 103. Medical advances and a 'cosseted' existence have prolonged the life span of the average...

Dick Everyman 01.07.11 11:02pm
Dick Everyman
Farmers employed to teach bankers humility

In a new clampdown on the banking sector, the Government is to employ farmers and taxi drivers to teach wealthy bankers some humility., Farmers and taxi drivers will also be encouraged to help the...

FraserWords 01.07.11 8:59pm
Daily Mail hits out at benefit scrounging migrants who take our jobs 0
roybland 01.07.11 7:11pm
Six-month-old tennis prodigy is Britain's new Wimbledon hope

Six-month -old Jimmy Williams has been named as Britain's next Wimbledon champion by the Lawn Tennis Association's chief talent scout.,  , 'As soon as I saw the way he swings his rattle, I knew we...

roybland 01.07.11 7:04pm
Woman freed after killing "most annoying husband in the world"

Mrs Elsie Peavey (79) was freed from the Old Bailey today following the sensational verdict of the jury. In two days of testimony she decsribed the husband's various foibles, It all began when...

ermintrude 01.07.11 5:04pm
Amy Winehouse tribute act has tour cancelled after arriving on stage coherent

Disappointed fans of Amy Winehouse reacted furiously when a tribute act arrived on stage untoxicated. "This is a real kick in the teeth." said Mary, 45, who'd left her children at home, or was it...

ronseal 01.07.11 4:58pm
Des Custard
New York District Attorney:"Dominique Strauss-KHAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNN!!!!"

DSK no longer under house arrest or on bail. Should be free to go on philandering shortly...

JohnA 01.07.11 4:22pm
Tennis fans notice Djokovic has the eyes of a killer 0
Christopher Frost 01.07.11 3:58pm
Christopher Frost
Fencing contractors to strike and form pickets. more soon 0
Mrblacker 01.07.11 3:13pm
Tories to encourage UK households to feed British birds instead of migrants

The government were embroiled in a new controversy today after remarks from a senior minister suggesting that UK households should give preferential treatment to native British bird species over...

bonjonelson 01.07.11 2:57pm
RAF to offer 'buy before we fly' Tripoli air photo service

With the UK's role in military operations against Colonel Gaddafi's regime predicted to cost £260m, the Conservative Defence Secretary, Liam Fox, yesterday announced that the Government were...

DrE 01.07.11 2:16pm
ghost dumped by girlfriend because she 'could see right through him' 0
Leeboy007 01.07.11 1:25pm
Anger as National Trust house-breeding plans end in fiasco

The National Trust’s controversial plan to breed new ancient manor houses for future generations has come under fire, following a failed attempt to mate the Somerset-based Elizabethan manor...

Oxbridge 01.07.11 1:24pm
FA celebrate new Bribery Act becoming law

The Football Association is one of several bodies celebrating the introduction of the new Bribery Act which became law today, 1st July 2011. Recognising the immense influence of a substantial bribe...

Midfield Diamond 01.07.11 12:46pm
Midfield Diamond
Criminal Trade Association better for all says Man

A new Government initiative to reduce the cost of crime is to be introduced next week., The National Association of Local Offenders (NALO) will register British criminals with a proven track record...

virtuallywill 01.07.11 11:59am
‘Lib Dem Line’ launched by Esther Rantzen

Esther Rantzen, founder of the child protection charity Child Line has launched a new crusade to protect Liberal Democrats – ‘Lib Dem Line’. After yesterday’s trouncing in the Inverclyde...

Dick Everyman 01.07.11 11:46am
Dick Everyman
New US Army Combat Training Simulator "only useful for Zombie attack training"

An Office of Management and Budget spokesman defended his cancellation of the $6.75 Billion project. "The simulator was built around an existing platform and we were unaware that it could only cope...

Tom55 01.07.11 11:08am
Describe my job? It's all swings & roundabouts, says park-keeper

more to follow...

Leeboy007 01.07.11 10:41am
Government takes action over mini roundabouts abuse

The Department for Transport has unveiled plans to tackle misuse of mini roundabouts across the UK. Roads Minister, Mike Penning, today launched a consultation into proposed changes that will see...

Dick Everyman 01.07.11 9:56am
Dick Everyman
Government stocks of red herring, 'seriously depleted', report warns

Government stocks of red herring have reached dangerously low levels because of overuse by ministers, according to a report from the Red Herring Quota Board.,  , Foreign Secretary William Hague is...

roybland 01.07.11 9:42am
Tories defend their right to stab pensioners in the back by robbing them 1
Qoxiivi 01.07.11 9:34am
Fury as National Trust house breeding programme fails again

The National Trust’s controversial plan to breed new ancient manor houses for future generations has come under fire, following a failed attempt to mate the Elizabethan manor Montacute House with...

Oxbridge 01.07.11 9:24am
and another one
Charlene Wittstock shocked at fiancé Prince Albert's choice of ring 0
charlies_hat 01.07.11 9:16am