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Middle aged bachelor & Kate Winslet / Man Utd. sperm donors 0
curry muncher 4 years

Fears of imminent story convergence...

George Osborne 'alive and well' say reports 1
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
Manchester United fans donating sperm misunderstood the term "Sport Relief". 0
dominic_mcg 4 years
Middle-aged bachelor 'in with a shot' after Kate Winslet split 2
jp1885 4 years

A 47 year-old Dudley singleton has received a 'shot in the arm' to his dreams of finding love, after it was announced that glamorous actress Kate Winslet is to split from her husband, director Sam...

BA to fly 60% of passengers. Remaining 40% to turn up three weeks later. 1
Ludicity 4 years
Bill Bailey declared World Heritage Site 3
edward hack 4 years

Wildlife enthusiasts and ornithologists across the UK have successfully called a halt to the proposed cropping of Bill Bailey’s wild, straggly beard which had been earmarked for scrubbing sometime...

Cyclone Thomas arrives in Fiji on time, says Fat Controller. 0
dominic_mcg 4 years
BBC apologises for on-air orgasm gaffe 1
curry muncher 4 years

The BBC is once again embroiled in scandal following the broadcast of an overly exited commentary during the Formula 1 Grand Prix in Bahrain at the weekend. Commentator Jonathan Legard apologised...

Government Clamps Down on Illegal Gossip-Sharing 1
Dai_Happy 4 years

A new Government bill looks set to be passed that will punish anyone caught illegally sharing gossip over the Internet. The Rumour Copyright Act aims to prevent unconfirmed titbits of information,...

Runaway Prius found alive and well and living in cardboard box 0
Ludicity 4 years
Football fans "outraged" at slur 0
John Square 4 years

Sports fans are being targeted in a campaign to get more sperm donors to help couples struggling to conceive. Leaflets and posters are being sent to 30 sports clubs and venues in the pilot area of...

World's first officially genderless person still waiting for toilets 0
Ludicity 4 years
MP Kumar found dead at No. 42. 1
MADJEZ 4 years
All submarine commanders to face Advanced Diving Test 0
Ludicity 4 years
Beckham injury latest : Radio 5 Live wets itself. 0
Stan Laurel 4 years
Tabloid joy as Charlie Whelan found alive and well 0
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
60% of BA strike passengers to reach destination, but only 20% of their luggage. 0
Ian Searle 4 years

Just saw Duncan got there first - sorry...

Emile Heskey ‘surprised but touched’ by surge in enquiries as to his fitness 0
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
BA confident it will still lose 60% of luggage during strike 0
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
GPs to see only healthy people to reduce wait for appointments 0
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
Achilles forced to pull out of Trojan War 4
Ludicity 4 years

'I am absolutely gutted,' said the Greek hero of myth and legend, 'I was really looking forward to representing my country and now this.' Achilles, regarded by many as the bravest and most beautiful...

Beckham's surgeon rules out World Cup - Dr Orava has a groin strain 0
brownpaperreporter 4 years
BBC launches public vote on Grand Prix coverage 0
brownpaperreporter 4 years

BBC revealed that they have asked for members of the public to vote for their preferred method of coverage. The current million-pound 3 hours per race coverage is languishing behind the iPlayer "GP...

Bob Carolgees banned from keeping pets, after admitting "fisting Spit the dog." 4
twookey 4 years

more to follow....

Dignitas killer app for iPhone 2
roybland 4 years
HSE issues warning against 'Bending It Like Becham'. 1
Ian Searle 4 years
Lady Gaga's Telephone blighted by poor reception. 0
4 years
New Formula 1 rules to make racing more entertaining proove successful.... 3
Basil_B 4 years

.to insomniacs the world over as there usual fix of watching cars going round and round a race circuit for two hours every fortnight for six months a year still continues to be more effective than...

Bogus rape victims to be offered a good slap & telling off 3
ED209 4 years

The government has today announced plans to offer 'a good slap' to women who turn up at Police stations and complain they've been raped after changing their mind about having sex once they sober up....

Kate Winslet's divorce lawyers expecting a titanic battle in the courts. 0
MADJEZ 4 years

More obvious punnery soon...