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Wet Wet Wet tops Australian hit parade. 4
Ostsee 4 years
DCI Barnaby revealed as a real police detective working undercover as an actor. 1
Tammy Flugh 4 years

More later...

“My hands are tied”, claims Max Mosley. “Ball-gag next, then nipple clamps”... 0
Doylem 4 years

“Both my privacy and my scrotum have been violated”, claimed Mr Mosley today, as he took his case to the Court of Human Rights in Strasbourg, “the former by intrusive tabloid revelations, the...

New Chinese Stealth fighter fails to impress Defence Chiefs 0
A Crooked MP 4 years

Kung Foo Panda was not quite what we had in mind said Defence Minister General Liange Guanglie. I think the working brief was probably wrong "Eats, Shoots, and leaves"...

Diana’s face appears on Dorito... 2
Doylem 4 years

“It was only a matter of time”, said ‘Stainless’ Steve Anderson, Vicar of St Diana’s Church, in Liverpool, as he held up the precious Dorito for the benefit of the assembled photographers. ...

Vietnam offers Australian boat people asylum in good will gesture 2
A Crooked MP 4 years

As Brisbane evacuates and creates a huge number of waterborne refugees, the government in Vietnam has kindly offered to take any excess people in repayment of the kind way in which they were...

C4 to outsource next series of "The IT Crowd" to the writers of "Mumbai Calling" 0
Ian Searle 4 years
Newcastle Clubbers Demand the Right to Bare Arms 0
De-scribe 4 years
Case collapses after Hong Kong Phooey unmasked as police janitor 0
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
Grooming of white poodles ‘easy but sick’ 0
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
Easyjet passengers ejected for not paying extra fuel levy 0
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
Royal wedding: tea towels will be allowed but not toilet paper 1
Dun Dunkin 4 years

The Palace caved in to allowing Royal Wedding tea towels saying 'the common people like that sort of thing' but they firmly drew the line at Royal Wedding toilet paper and condoms...

Life imitating art syndrome leaves man at the Luncheon on the Grass for days 0
simonjmr 4 years

He finished the day in Tracey Emin's Bed. More soon...

BBC Oracle predicts bank bonuses to be great this year 0
4ty2 4 years

as they are safe. The cleggoroons will not cut them as it would be suicide. Whoever considers cutting them would be defacto throwing the moneylenders out of their temple. It has only been done once...

Joan Bakewell, on the consolations of growing old... 0
Doylem 4 years

“I was known, in my prime, as the 'thinking man’s crumpet', though I never really knew whether to be flattered or offended. Anyway the problem, if that’s what it was, has long been solved. I...

Channel 5 to launch porn versions of Emmerdale, EastEnders and Question Time 3
ronseal 4 years

New owner of Channel 5 Richard Desmond has angrily denied that he is taking the station downmarket and has pledged to produce his own programmes to rival anything that the BBC and ITV can put out...

Bullitt director's funeral to include hearse chase through San Francisco. 2
Mrblacker 4 years
Law of diminishing returns 'all but gone within five years', according to expert 0
victory V 4 years
Inspector Poirot endorses budget supermarket - "I use my Lidl grey cells". 0
victory V 4 years

Morse soon...

Budget supermarket launches newspaper - 'Aldi news that's fit to print'. 0
victory V 4 years
Bristol landlord coerced into having a silly hairstyle. 0
Tammy Flugh 4 years

More later...

tesco advert leaves UK shoppers confused 1
4ty2 4 years

Whilst a lot of consumers have to shop around more to make ends meet they are suspicious by the tactic of Tesco to advertise shopping with what is perceived to be another company. The slogan that...

UK press under fire about military style football comments 0
4ty2 4 years

to avoid armed conflict at the football WM in Moscow, following the US example of possible misunderstanding of such suggestions by the confused gun owners. Also one should not mention tea-parties or...

By popular demand, Pizza Hut launches "Day-old cold" pizza 0
Dumbnews 4 years
London Underground drivers to go on strike for the Royal Wedding. 2
Tammy Flugh 4 years

"We want to go to the pub and get totally pissed like the rest of the country", a spokesman said...

Bury girl shocked after realising offer to be taken up the aisle, not a proposal 2
simonjmr 4 years
Police co-erced to beat up protesters 3
Bismarck 4 years

by undercover student...

Nick Clegg welcomes ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ policy for Lib Dems 1
Ludicity 4 years

Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg has defended plans to introduce a policy of ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ that would allow Liberal Democrats to serve in government while keeping their political...

Edinburgh takeaway to serve deep fried giant panda. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 4 years
Pakistan cricket rocked by fresh bribery allegation 0
Mrblacker 4 years

A new investigation is being promised by cricket's governing body after fresh bribery allegations surfaced in Pakistan. A tabloid newspaper says it has video footage of the nation's former test...