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French speaking dog posts in internet chat room... 5
be reasonable 4 years
"' Elf and safety Bans the Queen and Prince Charles" 0
Kazytc 4 years

Amidst the ever increasing political correctness, of the United Kingdom, a pensioner by the name of Jean Taffy-Thomas, living in council run, sheltered accommodation, in Scatty Park, Swansea, has...

Man no longer sees motorway commute as symbol of human futility, destructiveness 0
la maga 4 years

After seven and a half years of the same daily commute along the M11 between London and Bishops Stortford, and of seeing it as symbolic of the destructiveness and crushing futility of human...

Commonwealth Games Headlines 0
whickerman 4 years

Commonwealth Games Headlines Tortoise come last in 100m final, admits tactics backfired. Existential crisis for weightlifter. “I lift the weight up, I then put it down. I then lift a slightly...

World’s Strongest Man Competition to be Drug tested. 0
whickerman 4 years

Organisers have bowed to pressure and have announced that from now there will be stringent drug tests during strong man competitions., Competitors will be tested and if for example their...

Firthbook launched for people who wish to follow the careers of Peter and Colin 0
simonjmr 4 years
Liverpool FC receive another top offer 0
custard cream 4 years

The bidding war for Liverpool FC took another unexpected turn today, when chairman Martin Broughton announced a rival bid from a new consortium. "I am pleased to say that a three man consortium...

Chilean miners may be disappointed by reunion with their WAGs 0
simonjmr 4 years

"Being confined for over 60 days, psychologically they will have romanticised their relationships and images of their loved ones - unfortunately they will have a rude awakening when the come out -...

Chilean Miners said to be "climbing over themselves" to greet rescue capsule. 1
simonjmr 4 years
Simon Cowel rushes to Chile to organize live TV mine eviction show. Vote now! 1
bonjonelson 4 years

[more soon]...

Netto to Offer Other Supermarket Named Bags to Save Embarrassment 2
IABP 4 years

Netto is to offer other supermarket named bags to save the embarrassment of shopping there as more and more people start to feel the affects of the government's cuts. People usually bring their own...

William Hague "assumed Chuck Norris was leading hostage rescue" 1
bonjonelson 4 years

William Hague responded angrily this morning to criticism that he really should have known better than to let American special forces "have a go" at rescuing a British hostage in Afghanistan. "When...

US and Russian military reveal blow-up weapons 2
Sinnick 4 years

Under US Freedom of Information directives concerning the Cold War 50 years ago, the US Defense Department has today revealed a Top Secret collaboration with president Kruschev of the former Soviet...

Google tests car that drives itself 1
Deimos 4 years (Kind of an obvious one but I could not resist)...

Ed Elasticband Benefits Millionaires with Free Children 0
Kazytc 4 years

The leader of the labour Party, Ed Elasticband MP, has announced today, that he is going to give all millionaires free children, as a new form, of child benefit, amidst criticising David Cameron, for...

Bid to stem flow of toxic sludge fails, as Daily Mail hits streets again 2
Scroat 4 years
Radio 4 consumer affairs programme... 4
be reasonable 4 years

to be modified to reflect the true attitude of corporate Britain to the consumer. The programme, which will only be broadcast on long-wave, at 2.30 a.m., will be re-named 'screw you and up-yours'...

Oxbridge reintroduce butlers for all students as tuition fee limits lifted 6
la maga 4 years
Details of new Bond Film budget cuts leaked. 1
gaijintendo 4 years

The financial crisis' first victim, the new Bond film is finally started shooting after months of delays. In order to redress the funding issues, the new script is significantly more political, and...

Energy efficient devices responsible for prolonged recession 1
simonjmr 4 years

Campaigners today have outlined that energy efficient devices, light bulbs and domestic appliances have prolonged the current recession. "These devices are removing valuable spends from the economy,...

Hock eye 0
jock 4 years

'Park bench Tennants association', Tee hee...

Germaine Greer said rapists should be named and shamed ,so she has a chance 0
arrghgarry 4 years

of getting some...

Futurologists Hail Clegg's Lies as Key to 100% Accurate Prediction 2
wolfie 4 years

After his Atheist-anti-selection promise results in selective Catholic education for his kids, and his "no-tuition-fee-rise" guarantee brings about tuition-fee rises, scientists now have conclusive...

Progress on closing gender pay gap slows after husbands say they’ll see to it 1
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
dyslexic dog posts in internet cat room... 1
be reasonable 4 years
World shocked that anyone bothers with drug cheating in Commonwealth Games 1
Des Custard 4 years
Cruise abandons Scientology – ‘So clearly not a real religion.’ 0
therustler 4 years

Tom Cruise dismayed Scientology believers by today abandoning all faith in Scientology and announcing his conversion to the Church of Electric Light Orchestrology. Cruise spoke to us regarding his...

Long-term sick forced to compete in Commonwealth Games to prove lack of fitness. 0
SingingHinny 4 years
Met Chief says suing police is too easy, especially the way he runs things 0
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
Green recommends UK economy weekends in Monaco to reduce its tax bill 0
Duncan Biscuit 4 years