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Chinese only just celebrating new year

I'd never realised that time zones were so far apart (gets coat)...

Smart Alex 10.02.13 9:08pm
Smart Alex
Bloke walks into a supermarket and asks 'why the long face' ? 0
Mandy Lifeboat 10.02.13 8:52pm
Mandy Lifeboat
Horsemeat row "Gift that keeps on giving" says NewsBiscuit spokesman 1
Drylaw 10.02.13 8:47pm
sponge finger
Dog leads the way!

A local dog has led the way. The proud pooch has successfully guided the stricken village of Yamy out of disfunction by leading the way. Yamy in Blomsphere has suffered badly these last several...

Mik Bulk 10.02.13 8:43pm
Mik Bulk
Changing Of The Guard 'disappointing' as army holds charity non-uniform day 0
Smart Alex 10.02.13 8:22pm
Smart Alex
Man who upset Mafia shocked that his bed contains 29% horse 0
Smart Alex 10.02.13 8:05pm
Smart Alex
Pet survey - 9 out of 10 cats "Not bothered" about Whiskas ingredients 0
Drylaw 10.02.13 8:04pm
Stretch-Limo found to be 29% Hearse. 3
riesler 10.02.13 12:18pm

Whatever happened to the TV host Matthew Kelly? Sir,, Matthew Erasmus Kelly began his glittering career with West Combine Television in 1976. He was the popular face of such shows as [i]The Duck...

Mik Bulk 10.02.13 12:17pm
Mik Bulk
Fury at food contamination; "guilty party should be cow-whipped"

More to follow...

apepper 10.02.13 12:06pm
Change in inheritance tax leads to surge in murder rate

The UK murder rate has tripled since the government announced an increase in inheritance tax after 2015. "It makes sense.", said independent financial advisor Masher Wilkins, "Murdering someone is a...

apepper 10.02.13 12:05pm
Charlie didn't bite finger, fox sought as new evidence emerges. 0
MADJEZ 10.02.13 11:59am
Guest Columnist: Peter Hitchens

I am a vessel of woe. I spend my days afloat dark and dreary seas of despair and misery. My beloved Great Britain is broken. It is dead. I have cried my tear ducts dry. There is nothing left. The...

Mik Bulk 10.02.13 11:55am
Food Channel to comission new film version of "Equus" starring Gordon Ramsay 1
Scronnyglonkle 10.02.13 11:29am
Harrods burgers found to contain traces of Panda.

And Gryphon...

deskpilot3 10.02.13 11:28am
Tesco in-store cafe offers diners Filly Mignon...

I can probably keep this up for ever...

deskpilot3 10.02.13 11:25am
Horse jokes same quality as the products concerned 0
Lens Cap 10.02.13 10:54am
Lens Cap
Aldi checkout queue found to contain 100% turkeys 0
Drylaw 10.02.13 10:31am
RSPCA Advice: "Equine Prime Ministers.......

.should be put down."...

Jesse Bigg 10.02.13 9:52am
Jesse Bigg
Princes tinned tuna contains traces of Osama Bin Laden

Twin packs expected to rise to £9.11....

Dick Everyman 10.02.13 9:47am
Dick Everyman
Cameron's Speech At Recent Euro Meeting....

Found to be a load of horse sh..t...

Jesse Bigg 10.02.13 9:31am
Jesse Bigg
Donkey Found In Stew At No. 10..... 0
Jesse Bigg 10.02.13 9:22am
Jesse Bigg
Donkey races

Ladbrokes the national Bookmaker Chain is the latest company to fall victim in the tainted good’s scandal. An anonymous group of semi-addicted gamblers have setup a Facebook page to publicly air...

edoode 10.02.13 8:44am
Dateline London 09 Feb 2013.

Following today’s hastily convened meeting of the government ‘Food Standards Agency’ (FSA) with the heads of Meat Retailers and Suppliers. Environment Secretary Tommy Scruttock released a...

edoode 10.02.13 8:12am
Aintree Tesco's announce profits warning 0
Ironduke 10.02.13 2:36am
Security beefed-up at Melton Mowbray Stud farms 0
Trini 10.02.13 12:44am
Romanian Chariot Racing championships cancelled 0
Trini 10.02.13 12:21am
DEFRA announce Findus to sponsor badger cull

Protesters Hoarse...

Trini 10.02.13 12:11am
Straight men refuse to get married to girlfriends for fear of being called "gay" 0
quango 10.02.13 12:08am
Chinese fury as Year of the Snake found to contain 29% horsemeat 0
custard cream 09.02.13 11:32pm
custard cream