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Vampires urged to Show Restraint After Blood Ban Lifted. 0
Dun Dunkin 4 years
Incredible fuel-efficent mode of transportation discovered, called walking 1
Dumbnews 4 years
Ancestors from the Stone age pleased their way of life is still preserved today 0
Dumbnews 4 years
Fund raising for Jean Michel Jarre to play his music on the moon 1
arrghgarry 4 years

is going extremely well ...

Nick Clegg to change name to Ed Cameron 0
bonjonelson 4 years
Kim Jong Ill's facebook profile cluttered with ads from weapon manufacturers 0
Dumbnews 4 years
Ed Milliband is glad to have won the championship ,but not looking 0
arrghgarry 4 years

forward to shagging Hillary Clinton...

Blair receives letters from women who usually make advances to violent prisoners 0
la maga 4 years

Insiders say that Tony Blair has recently begun to receive a small trickle of letters from the kind of screwed up women who usually write to well-known violent prisoners offering their bodies and...

Unions cooling to Milliband... 0
Skylarking 4 years

after he gives solo rendition of "I am what I am, I am my own special cre-ation" to assembled delegates...

'I Have No Strings' insists Puppet. 0
Dun Dunkin 4 years
Ed to offer David new post of Department of Sewers and Paedophiles. 1
the coarse whisperer 4 years
'I'm My Own Man,' say Union Leaders on Their First Day as Leader of Labour 0
IABP 4 years
Health & Safety Executive demand fire-resistant Koran production 0
hero2zero 4 years

Full report later...

David Cameron's newborn baby 'sleeps in wheelie bin' 0
pinxit 4 years

Green, grey, red or 'silver spoon' not specified...

Some prick elected leader of pricks opposing other pricks, nation to get shafted 0
la maga 4 years
1.5% of Britons prefer soccer to rugby, according to ONS. 10
be reasonable 4 years

New research published by the Office of National Statistics reveals that up to 1.5% of British men prefer soccer to rugby. A spokesman for the FA, Mr. P. Tatchell, said "we think that the actual...

Oxbridge type ousts Oxbridge types to lead Socialist Workers party back to power 0
Ostsee 4 years
Diane Abbott and Ed Balls form a coalition to oust Ed Milliband. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 4 years
Home Secretary announces spending cuts for the Fashion Police. 2
MADJEZ 4 years
Ed Milliband announces his brother David to be his stunt double. More soon. 1
dominic_mcg 4 years
ONS - correction - 1.5% of population is heterosexual 0
Sinnick 4 years

ONS have today issued a press announcement making a minor correction to their recent report on sexual diversity. An error was introduced when copying the research data into the original press...

P.C. “Brigade” demand action on diversity 0
hero2zero 4 years

Recent research, claiming that the percentage of those gay in the UK is far lower than previously thought has resulted in calls for diversity re-adjustments throughout society., Officials at the...

10 Boy Scouts Seriously injured in Flammable Chinese Marshmallow Accident 0
gaijintendo 4 years

Chinese food authorities are investigating the possible contamination of gelatine with various petrochemicals...

Protester left holding the baby after literal interpretation of FUCK THE POLICE! 0
4 years
People noticing nights are drawing in because of people that keep saying the 0
Basil_B 4 years

nights are drawing in...

Help on the way for text-starved 1
roybland 4 years

A new service to help mobile phone owners who never receive text messages will be launched next week.,  , 'Our service will bring relief to thousands on people who sit waiting for that text...

Fatality as man with heart attack rushed to Holby City by dim ambulance driver 0
Basil_B 4 years
Nick Clegg sleeps in a cardboard box in David Cameron's bedroom. 2
Psycadelic Squirrel 4 years

He gets the slipper if he jumps on to the bed...

Dyslexic Judge sentences petty criminal to six months in goal. 3
Ian Searle 4 years
Proposal to abolish the Ministry of Sound as part of the public sector cuts. 1
Ian Searle 4 years