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Mancunians embarrassed as murder statistics reach an all-time low. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 4 years
Wales to be punished after using entire EU quota of 'L's, says Brusses. 0
MightyBlair 4 years
Pins & Needles Monthly to close due to poor circulation 12
Mr Glover Lover 4 years
Electorate impressed by no nonsense, straight talking approach, says Mandelson 0
AdrianJ 4 years
Jack Tweed abandons hopes of career as TheRapist after acquital 1
simonjmr 4 years
Bon Marche and Evans merge to be rebranded as "Fat Lass Fashions" 3
simonjmr 4 years
"I only say my arse is too big to make real porkers feel bad"admits skinny woman 2
DrTurmoil 4 years

Dawn Franklin, a 34-year-old size 8 slash 10 from Bristol, admitted yesterday that her regular references to her insecurities and worries about the supposedly enormous size of her arse were “less...

Sharp tongued wielding man injures Labour's hopes 0
simonjmr 4 years
Environmental concerns about huge expanding slick of leaking Labour voters 0
rickwestwell 4 years
Nick Griffin Gaffe: Fails to call voter a bigot. 0
whickerman 4 years

A BNP supporter was left outraged when Nick Griffin was heard to call him fair minded, and unprejudiced after he had sought assurances from the leader of the BNP that his favourite eastern...

UK Punk'd by Leaders debates 0
simonjmr 4 years
Leeches to distances themselves from politicians 0
simonjmr 4 years
Merseyside Ice cream van owner: my winter rounds are just for selling drugs 0
simonjmr 4 years
Oxford don, Figes to look forward to job selling fridges 1
PluckyMunky 4 years
Brown makes bigoted woman jibe, ugly woman tanbo and a fat woman the foztrot 0
MrChigleysAunt 4 years

More misspelt dances soon...

Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall: My Vegetarian Shame 9
Stan Laurel 4 years

Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall, celebrated TV chef, smallholder, and real food campaigner admitted last night his “entire professional life had been a sham”, after being outed as a rampant meat...

Hopes fade for lost Isle of Wight climbers 2
Oxbridge 4 years

A party of three elderly adventurers who set out to climb up Shanklin Chine, a notoriously dangerous natural gorge on the Isle of Wight, have not been sighted in over three hours. According to...

Brown slated for telling the truth 0
MrChigleysAunt 4 years

"I just can't fuckin' win whatever I do" says Brown...

'Thank god I took off the mike before having a wank in the car' thinks Brown. 0
MADJEZ 4 years

More recorded conversations soon on Sky News., More recorded conversations soon on Sky News., More recorded conversations soon on Sky News., More recorded conversations soon on Sky News., More...

James Bond given junk status 2
Des Custard 4 years

After the failure of talks aimed at tackling the structural fiscal deficit at struggling MGM, credit rating agency Standard & Poor’s has downgraded the corporation’s bonds, James Bonds, to...

Rochdale woman complains about phone harassment by foul-mouthed Scot. 0
Zadok the second 4 years
Brown Resigns After Outburst 0
aescott 4 years

Gordon Brown resigned from politics today after an outburst about a voter was recorded on a microphone he'd forgotten he was wearing. "I had no idea ordinary people were like that", he said. "Thank...

Catholic Church introduces safer PE exercises for Boys Schools 0
brownpaperreporter 4 years

In an attempt to clean up the image of the priesthood and that of Catholic schools in particular, the physical exercise routines have undergone Papal scrutiny and the changes are as follows,...

'I actually called the old bag a big c**t' says Brown. 0
MADJEZ 4 years

Aides promise to stop giving him whisky for breakfast in future...

Parents furious as police abandon "resource draining" search for boogeyman 0
Rorschach 4 years

"We've looked under the bed. We've looked in the wardrobe.."...

Gay people say Tories are 'not normal'. 0
MADJEZ 4 years
Pressure gets too much for Cameron as he reveals new deputy. 0
MADJEZ 4 years

David Cameron with Chancellor elect; Mr Smiley-Face http://news.sky.com/sky-news/content/StaticFile/jpg/2010/Apr/Week4/15621113.jpg...

Brown: 'I said big 'earted, honest' 0
allmyownstunts 4 years
'Volcanic ash' cloud caused by Dignitas crematorium NOT Icelandic volcano. 0
MADJEZ 4 years

Meteorologists studying the recent 'volcanic ash' have tracked the cloud back to the Swiss dignitas clinic. Their crematorium has been running night and day to keep up with demand leading to the...

Flash drive told to stop showing off. 1
Zadok the second 4 years