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Short sighted criminals to be offered tazer eye treatment. 0
wallster 4 years
Political correctness goes mad but is still offered job 0
Des Custard 4 years
Queen 'to be shared with France' in cost-cutting exercise 1
ED209 4 years

In a move which will shock many traditionalists, the Royal family will be shared with France in an effort to cut down on costs. The French President, an office so long associated with philandering...

Labour and Tory voters found to be genetically linked 7
4ty2 4 years

in fact so seems to be religious beliefs and disbelieves. However a debate arose on a scientific conference immediately when trying to use the evidence to proove the existance of a principle called...

Underground mining industry struggles with tunnel vision 0
Dumbnews 4 years
Widower abandons computer dating after disastrous dinner date with laptop 1
dicky37 4 years

[More soon]...

Keep your dreams down to earth, says Dr. Phil 1
Dumbnews 4 years
Conservative Party conference to be rescheduled to clash with East Enders 0
bonjonelson 4 years

"That'll teach the unions to mess around" - Cameron...

Whatever you think about something, the opposite is also true, says Dr. Phil 0
Dumbnews 4 years
Groundhog Day comes true 1
Sinnick 4 years I told you it would :-)...

Just as beautiful a new magazine for plus 14 size women wil be 0
arrghgarry 4 years

available at Mr doughnuts ,cake shops ,chippies and any food outlet. The owner would like to have put them at Fruit and veg shops but there wasn`t a good response in the trial run...

sky diving deaths by inexperienced parachutists are going through 3
arrghgarry 4 years
Tossers with little shits for children breathe easy as ADHD is ruled genetic 12
Oxbridge 4 years

Morons with no attention span who are too fucking thick and useless to bring their children up properly have welcomed the discovery that attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), often...

Ed Milliband sorts one bastard out and finds there is another one on the way 0
arrghgarry 4 years
Pope: I really enjoyed my visit to Britain 0
Sinnick 4 years

"You guys, you're such fun, so gullible. You really fell for my joke about atheist Nazis, heh? And I thought you were supposed to have the world's best sense of humour! And you believed all that...

"Red or Dead" To Release New Labour Leadership Product Range. 0
Ablative Fabsolute 4 years
Leaked granny letter warning of big Christmas present cuts shocks nation's kids 0
roybland 4 years

A leaked 'granny' letter warning of swingeing cuts to children's presents this Christmas has been condemned by children's supporters.,  , 'I'm so angry at the person who leaked this letter,' said...

Police "volunteers" to receive kit of pitchforks and burning torches. 1
the coarse whisperer 4 years
iBall, the latest, very personal MP3 Player complete with Bluetooth and Wi-Front 1
hero2zero 4 years
Party strategists urge David to, “Stick with it!” 2
hero2zero 4 years

Highlighting the strategic planning necessity for David Miliband to work alongside his brother, Party Leader, Ed at least to the next election as it is hoped that Rolf Harris may be persuaded to...

Thieves steal entire Cabernet Sauvignon crop 4
Gerontius 4 years

Thieves broke into a warehouse in Poitiers early yesterday morning and stole last year’s entire crop of Cabernet Sauvignon grapes., Police think the audacious robbery had been made easier for the...

Balding potty 'Big Ears' Prince Charles denounces 'cruel humour' 1
roybland 4 years
Kim Young-un first to spot fruit cake crumb on Workers Party carpet 0
Gerontius 4 years

Vampire hunters made my life a misery claims Walsall Goths 1
simonjmr 4 years

"Those sons of Van Helsing keep chasing down the street, shouting day walker at us, throwing garlic and generally trying to stabs us through the hearts with a stake at any opportunity." "It's...

Curtis could be victim of Boston Strangler, says police chief. More soon. 2
dominic_mcg 4 years
As Tony Curtis dies in his sleep, scientists are pushed to find cure for sleep 1
4 years

Even before he's laid to rest, the death of Hollywood icon Tony Curtis has triggered calls for more to be done to investigate and find a cure for sleep. According to a statement by his family,...

'Now is the time to watch the germans carefully' warns military 0
4 years

As the First World War officially comes to an end on Sunday, top bods at the military are warning the government to be on its guard in case the bosch try it again. Sunday 3rd October sees the final...

Obama reports that some parts of America medically ,educationally 0
arrghgarry 4 years

are similar to parts of the third world ,and it is nice to see an improvement...

Blinded by Deloitte 4
Gerontius 4 years

Tory billionaire Lord Ashcroft has been given the all clear by a leading Harley Street doctor to resume using his anus once again., Fears that the Ashcroft bottom may still have had some shit left...

Banks to Offer Poorer Service while Dealing with Complaints about Poor Service 0
IABP 4 years