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David Cameron voted one of the most serious-looking men in the World. 1
vulture1 21 hours

Other finalists are Barack Obama, Angela Merkel, that bloke they made Archbishop of Canterbury, David Attenborough talking about how all the Polar Bears are dying, any BBC newsreader mentioning the...

BBC to repeat their Commonwealth Games' coverage until somebody watches. 0
Crayon 21 hours

Endless hours soon...

Russia very worried about UK arms embargo 0
vulture1 21 hours

In case it stops and they get lumbered with a load of useless kit just like the British Army...

Suddenly Britain Not Imperialist Slavers Now they Giving Out Free Medals 1
Dun Dunkin 21 hours
Clown Gets 600k for Funfair Dismissal 0
Dun Dunkin 22 hours
Drugs Given to Wrong 'Pony' 0
Dun Dunkin 22 hours

'its country ways' townies wouldn't understand...

Planes in Ukraine shot down by the drunk, insane and vain, in the main 0
farmer giles 23 hours

Spain plainly rhymes with Ukraine, even in Maine, where the rain falls mainly daily lately The quick brown fox...

David Cameron caught doping Shetland ponies 0
Kevin the Swan 1 day
First Hunting Now Smacking the Pony is Illegal 0
Dun Dunkin 1 day

'They enjoy it really'...

Public too stupid to understand that black boxes are actually orange 2
beckfordburger 1 day

“I honestly give up”, said Channel 5's token female newsreader Mandy Flyme, as she left a convention of science correspondents, aviation experts and token female newsreaders, “I’ve told the...

USA sends $47M to Gaza to build more targets for the Israelis 0
bonjonelson 1 day

Last night US Congress agreed on an emergency package of $47 million to send to Gaza in order for them to construct better targets for the Israeli Air Force. The relentless attacks on Gaza by the...

Booker List revealed. 3
Boutros 1 day

1) Yorkshire Tea 1280-bag catering pack, sealed for freshness, 2) Non-branded mid-softness toilet tissue 72-roll, stacking, 3) 48-pack Nobo pens (assorted colours), 4) 'Chef's Larder' 20 litre...

Children logging on to 'stranger danger' website asked to accept cookies 7
Bravenewmalden 1 day

No more soon...

Loyalist paramilitaries adopt Slottr for punishment shooting appointments 1
RobArmstrong 1 day

In what is being seen as a radical move for what is, essentially, a medieval organisation, a coalition of loyalist paramilitary organisations today announced that it will be using Slottr to arrange...

Glasgow: Confusion in athletes village as people ask for 'salad and vegetables'. 2
MADJEZ 1 day
Israeli lobby gets 'pot calling kettle black' award for criticising David Ward 8
RobArmstrong 1 day
England hoping Scottish Independence will put an end to Jools' Annual Hootenanny 4
bonjonelson 1 day
Prince Charles busted in 'Operation Poppyseed' dawn raid 1
Lenny Bee 1 day

Drug Squad officers swooped in co-ordinated dawn raids on the Royal Family today after removing a quantity of poppyseed cake from secluded Highgrove House, the Gloucestershire home of Prince Charles....

Pro Russian separatists scratch heads as two Ukrainian jets shot down 2
RobArmstrong 1 day

'How the hell did we do that?' demanded Uri Firtov, a separatist officer. 'It's not as if we've got any missiles at all, particularly none that could do that sort of thing. I guess a lucky pistol...

Doctors sell diseases to Patients in Massive Benefits Scam claims Government 0
Chris Turnbull 1 day

A government investigation has found that all diseases ever in the UK, have been manufactured by so called “llness dealer” Doctors, who have sold them to patients for £250 a pop, so that the...

Shock as Queen overheard saying "My kingdom for a spliff" 0
sydalg 1 day
Porn sites cause Eye Cancer claims Goverment Technology expert,more soon 0
Thundi 1 day
New Police Uniform Makes Them Look Like Smurfs 0
Dun Dunkin 1 day

"We got a job lot cheap on ebay. People will get used to it"...

Commonwealth viewers warned against drinking every time BBC mention London 2012 5
MADJEZ 1 day

There are fears that BBC viewers will be dicing with death if they attempt to down a shot or take a swig of an alcoholic drink every time a commentator says 'London 2012' or '2012 Olympics'. A South...

Cannibal who ate philosopher "just looking for food for thought", court told 0
sydalg 1 day
EVERY expense spared as Scots put on opening ceremony. 0
MADJEZ 1 day
Gerrard Explains England Retirement. "I'm Not Playing For England Anymore." 1
IABP 2 1 day
Queen's horse Estimate: "I blame myself for positive drugs test" 0
AReader 1 day
World Cup style TV screens to stream C.C.T.V. in British town centres 4
The Last Detail 1 day

The government has announced plans to install enormous televisions in the streets of Britain's town centres, streaming live footage from C.C.T.V. cameras. Following the popularity of the huge screens...

Pre-Olympic Legacy safe as public show apathy & disdain for Commonwealth Games. 3
MADJEZ 1 day

Just over two years since Britain wowed the world and surprised itself with the 2012 Olympics the population are returning to a pre-Olympic level of apathy. Before the opening ceremony in 2012 many...