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De-radicalisation sessions to be held in room 102 after double booking 0
Bigglesworth 13 hours
Shaun Wright may have acquired invisibility cloak 0
deceangli 13 hours

South Yorkshire PCC Shaun Wright is believed to be using a Harry Potter-style invisibility cloak to evade attention from satirists. "I just want to be left in peace with my 85 grand", said a...

Jihadis urged: Don't go to Syria - try Rotherham instead 1
Oxbridge 13 hours
Israel Annexes 1,000 acres belonging to five Palestinian villages to Build Homes 4
Dun Dunkin 13 hours

"An old man in the sky said it was ok "...

Middle Class Vegetarians Tell Everyone to Stop Eating Meat 2
Dun Dunkin 14 hours

Compulsory Yoga and smug lifestyles to follow...

Carol Mills to be the first person barred from the House for being unqualified. 0
Robert Koch 15 hours
Bucket sales soar as nude pictures of John Mccririck leaked online 0
apepper 15 hours

More to follow...

David Cameron announces new powers 0
ESJ 15 hours

'I can now see through walls and run faster than a speeding bullet'...

Football Club Pays A Lot Of Money To Another For A Very Good Footballer 2
SimonJJames 16 hours

In a move that will rock the foundations of football, a Football Club, today, paid a lot of money to another Football Club for a very good football player. A spokesman for the selling Football Club...

X Factor Busy Auditioning Adverts For The Live Shows 8
IABP 2 17 hours

It's Back! Well, very nearly and this year promises to be bigger and better than ever. Auditions for the adverts, which make up 75% of the show, have been going on for a few months and viewers will...

Schoolchildren to be taught how to govern 0
NewBiscuit 17 hours

Remedial lessons in how to write and implement government policy are now being taught in primary schools, in order to try to close a capability gap that has been identified in the UK. Latest studies...

Odin Signs For Christianity On Transfer Deadline 0
SimonJJames 17 hours

In a major coup for Christianity, Odin, the ruler of Asgard and Allfather of the Norse Gods has signed a contract to the end of time to replace the outgoing Holy Spirit in the Christian Trinity....

Evil super-villains banned from using Kryptonite for performance enhancement 0
NewBiscuit 17 hours
Rock me Louis van Gaal 0
godly1966 17 hours

Manchester United today announced that they had singed Colombian footballing sensation Falcao on a one year loan from Monaco, but it soon became apparent that they had accidently signed Austrian one...

Academics admit defeat in search for meaning of Shrewsbury 0
Bravenewmalden 18 hours

The panel of international scientists, philosophers and anthropologists established in 1994 with the task of explaining Shrewsbury was last night forced to concede defeat. Despite being closely...

Pakistan TV back on air with 'Strictly No Dancing' 0
cinnahmon 19 hours

Security forces have retaken control of Pakistan TV in Islamabad just in time for the country's second favourite reality show, 'Strictly No Dancing', to go to air for an expectant population. ...

C of E would "loosen infidels' heads slightly" to make them convert 5
sydalg 19 hours
Galloway attacker "was pretending to be a dog". More soon. 2
Al OPecia 19 hours
UKIP confident of more signings on transfer deadline day 1
RobArmstrong 19 hours

Nigel Farage was in bullish mood this morning when facing questions from the press on how things would go today, as the transfer window closed. 'I'm not remotely worried', said the man known amongst...

Standing on the aircraft steps, Fernando Torres misses the plane to Italy 2
AReader 19 hours
Galloway attacker to call 42 million character witnesses 0
AReader 20 hours

The same joke, and yet not the same...

CBI say foreign-owned UK airports must expand or untaxed profits won't increase. 0
Crayon 20 hours
Friends Of Green Earthpiece Now Tell Us What To Eat, As Well As How To Vacuum 2
Titus 20 hours
Half-time team talks to be regulated by EU 0
cinnahmon 21 hours

It has been announced today that Premier League managers will have to tone down the intensity of the criticism of their under-performing players under new guidelines to be introduced by the European...

Ryanair removes toilets to add extra seats, offers Depends for only 10 Euros 0
Jim Garner 21 hours
Stuart Wheeler Innundated With Calls From Lib Dem MPs Seeking Lunch Invitations 0
Titus 21 hours
Saying Spanish Health Service is Better Than NHS Is a Crime 0
Dun Dunkin 1 day

"How dare they say we are crap"...

New Geometry Sets Start Gathering Dust From Today. 2
IABP 2 1 day
Apple launch isPhone for exploding Middle Eastern markets. 1
Crayon 1 day

FaceTime renamed HeadTime...

Putin's 'New Russia' Very Much Like 'Old USSR' 0
Dun Dunkin 1 day