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German city of Bonn taxes prostitutes with meter, clients by the millimetre.

Griffin 31.08.11 12:42pm
Traveller eviction starts badly as Pete Ikey serves notice from council. 0
MADJEZ 31.08.11 12:31pm
Di Canio shock as striker refuses to take a dive

Following his team's defeat in the Carling Cup last night, Swindon manager Paolo di Canio is shocked that English footballers will not go down theatrically under the slightest challenge. The...

Midfield Diamond 31.08.11 12:08pm
Midfield Diamond
FA launches Let Kick Climate change Denial out of Football campaign

Football fans who make offensive chants about wind turbines could face stiff jail sentences, as the government and the FA pledge to 'get tough' with climate change deniers. The news was welcomed by...

ronseal 31.08.11 10:19am
Meltdown at Panini as deadline day gets underway 0
simonjmr 31.08.11 9:41am
Wenger buys 4 new Defenders from Landrover. More soon. 1
dominic_mcg 31.08.11 9:32am
Tragic death of Len Ganley - curse of Half Man Half Biscuit strikes again

Welsh actress Nerys Hughes was reported to be holed up in a Rhyl safehouse last night after the notorious 'Half Man Half Biscuit curse' struck yet again with the death of snooker referee Lan Ganley....

rickwestwell 31.08.11 9:09am
"Coolest summer on record" claim not true, says Henry Winkler. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 31.08.11 8:49am
Cameron unhappy at not selling Cable before transfer window closed. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 31.08.11 8:48am
We would have found Gaddafi by now claims former editor of the Sport. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 31.08.11 8:46am
International Break arranged to allow Fantasy Football Leagues to update. 0
Drylaw 31.08.11 7:53am
Wootton Bassett sad about no longer being sad 0
roybland 31.08.11 7:00am
Sarcozy nationalises Disneyland Paris

French President Nicolas Sarcozy is considering nationalising Disneyland Paris, to prevent foreign visitors being surprised at its inherent 'frenchness'. Despite the best efforts of Disneyland's...

31.08.11 6:54am
Chiswick organist gives woman vibrato.

A Chiswick organist has been accused of performing vibrato on an elderly woman in a church vestry. Turnham Green resident Humphrey Nonce was allegedly seen with 69 year old Doris Clunge sitting on...

rebel not taken 31.08.11 12:47am
rebel not taken
New Facebook feature automatically "likes" all your top friend's posts 0
Dumbnews 30.08.11 11:51pm
JayZ now has 100 problems 0
bonjonelson 30.08.11 11:07pm
Crackdown on rioters starts by only allowing benefits for the first looter

David Cameron today outlined his new hard-nosed approach to rioters and looters “Only the first looter in the family will get benefits, subsequent looters will not bring in more Government cash to...

brownpaperreporter 30.08.11 9:34pm
Police mustard to tackle watercress thieves 0
rickwestwell 30.08.11 9:32pm
Desperate Arsene Wenger recruits Colonel Gaddafi to shore up Arsenal's defence 0
JohnA 30.08.11 7:32pm
Len Ganley takes extended rest 1
rickwestwell 30.08.11 6:45pm
Michele Bachmann Declares Own Candidacy A Warning From God

Hot on the heels of controversial remarks that the recent earthquake and storm on America's east coast were a sign of god's wrath, presidential hopeful Michele Bachmann today added to her portents of...

Textbook 30.08.11 6:16pm
"More bang for your buck" 14 days @ Sirte Hilton starts Saturday 3rd September.

More soon. Get in before the rush. I'll get my flak jacket...

dvo4fun 30.08.11 6:07pm
Coolest Summer for Two Decades "Hangover From Labour Government" 0
thisisall1word 30.08.11 6:02pm
Man killed by Taser offered 'too much resistance' claim police - 2 51
Screenie 30.08.11 5:20pm
Al OPecia
Chiles Set To Star As Bungle As Disney Sings Deal For Rainbow Movie

Cuddly Daybreak presenter, Adrian Chiles, is reported to have singed a contract with Disney USA for a seven figure sum that now sees the way clear for him to co-star as the somewhat effete bear,...

Duff 30.08.11 2:53pm
Danny Alexander Asked By Cameron & Clegg To Justify Poor Summer Weather

The Coalition Government's chief apologist, Danny Alexander, has been handed his toughest task yet since slithering into power with his fellow Lib Dem colleagues. Forget the disgracefully shoddy,...

Duff 30.08.11 2:20pm
Uncle of George W. Bush 'caught thinking' 0
Griffin 30.08.11 12:15pm
Microblogging Site Goes Into Meltdown As Cheryl Cole Posts Her First Tweet

It really is one of those [i]"Where were you when[/i]" moments; surely on a par with the assassination of JFK and Neil Armstrong setting foot on the moon. At 11.30 today Cheryl Cole posted her...

Duff 30.08.11 11:42am
Comedian set to make big splash

Actor/comedian Matt Lucas, star of hit TV shows such as Little Britain and Shooting Stars will be heading for the fast flowing water’s of the Thames at the weekend to play his part in this year’s...

Gerontius 30.08.11 11:03am
BBC Fail To Meet Irritating Accent Quota

The BBC is meeting its quota for presenters who aren't very good and who have odd facial mannerisms. However, it is falling short of its target of having 50% of presenters with excrutiating,...

Wheelright 30.08.11 11:02am