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Nadine Dorries aborts her bushtucker trial within acceptable time frame 0
charlies_hat 13.11.12 1:37pm
Doctors communicate with potato in deep vegetative state 0
Stan 13.11.12 1:23pm
Greek government agrees Wonga slider combination to secure short-term loan 0
Nowherefast 13.11.12 1:11pm
Slimmer of the year goes on rampage.

Pete Formby, 35, of Wilmslow, Cheshire, was arrested today after killing five of his colleagues. Formby, who recently won the ‘slimmer of the year’ award after dropping from 28 stone, 6 pounds to...

sigmund 13.11.12 1:07pm
Tim Davie suspended for 'getting to grips' with the BBC typing pool 0
pinxit 13.11.12 1:00pm
New York cop to enjoy retirement after last week in work passes off uneventfully

A hard-bitten New York cop is looking forward to a leisurely retirement tonight after failing to be killed in the line of duty during his last week in work. Luckily for Danny Nimzowitch, his...

Gary Stanton 13.11.12 12:37pm
Gary Stanton
Abu Qatada ‘surprised but delighted’ with free holiday win

Muslim Cleric Abu Qatada spoke of his shock at winning a free holiday to a mystery destination earlier today. ‘It’s, like, totally amazing’ he declared. ‘I got home today to find a letter...

ianslat 13.11.12 11:34am
Tim Davie arrested. Charged with hacking BBC management. 0
weematt 13.11.12 11:10am
“We’re the good guys”, insists drug dealer Danny. "Hell, the first hit is free”.

While loan sharks and pawnbrokers operate on the high street with impunity, as though they were legitimate businesses, drug dealers like Danny continue to be demonised. It doesn't seem fair. Danny...

Tripod 13.11.12 10:47am
Home Secretary deports Abu Qatada to Geordieland instead

Home Secretary Theresa May has reacted to the latest Court setback in deporting fanatical Muslim cleric Abu Qatada to Jordon by sending him to Geordieland instead. Ms May noted: ‘Sending a...

Yikes 13.11.12 10:10am
Tap & Spile ups the ante with new range of surreal ales.

The Tap & Spile chain of live music drinking establishments looks set to change its customer base with the introduction of a new range of ‘art period beers’. The move is supported by CAMSA,...

malgor 13.11.12 9:29am
Chelsea relief as Terry scan shows only minor 'black man's pinch' injury 0
Midnight Dreary 13.11.12 8:45am
Midnight Dreary
New report shows BBC pays no tax. in fact takes money from government. 0
MADJEZ 13.11.12 1:44am
Equity calls for strike action as BBC drama hands top acting roles to managers 0
Nowherefast 12.11.12 11:21pm
Puppeteer thought he was putting fist in Elmo. 0
MADJEZ 12.11.12 11:21pm
I'm a BBC executive, get me out of here

Please add...

tedweasel 12.11.12 11:07pm
BBC confirms 'Acting Director General' doesn't mean he is pretending 2
custard cream 12.11.12 10:38pm
custard cream
BBC budget squandered on Entwhistle-blowing procedure 2
charlies_hat 12.11.12 8:38pm
Dick Everyman
Used to work for Newsnight? Write for Newsbiscuit, it's ok to make the news up

In a dramatic move to bring integrity back to the BBC and Newsnight, internet satirist from Newsbiscuit will be called upon to write the news. "Lets face it John O'Farrell's lot have got a better...

simonjmr 12.11.12 8:21pm
Insurance premiums to rise as meerkats win equal pay tribunal. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 12.11.12 8:13pm
Lone Pacifist Video Game Designer calls for a 'Peaceful Solution'.

An attempt to diffuse the mounting tension between prospective players of hotly anticipated video game 'Call of Duty: Black Ops II' was attempted yesterday, as one of the game's designers called for...

MarmiteMedicine 12.11.12 7:45pm
Relief for John Terry as medical scan confirms he is white. 0
bonjonelson 12.11.12 7:11pm
Qatada released, BBC apologise for calling him terrorist 'Just in case'

More apologies soon...

MADJEZ 12.11.12 7:09pm
New invisibility cloak 'mislaid already'. 1
malgor 12.11.12 6:53pm
BBC rolling news to feature “only BBC-related news”, says new DG...

Acknowledging that the level of interest in the corporation’s cock-ups was reaching epidemic proportions - even sometimes reaching beyond the corridors of Broadcasting House itself - the BBC’s...

Tripod 12.11.12 6:14pm
Lighthouse keeper 'in downward spiral' says inquest 0
Dick Everyman 12.11.12 6:10pm
Dick Everyman
Newsbiscuit music column: Abu Qatada's latest release

In celebration of his latest successful appeal and as a tribute to his fellow Londoners Abu Qatada is releasing a Knees-up album. The album tracks are all based on well loved London tunes., The...

weematt 12.11.12 6:03pm
Ex Thatcher Minister remains as BBC Chairman to set corporation straight after

Ex Thatcher Minister Accused. (Not a proper sub but just saying)...

Nowherefast 12.11.12 5:46pm
Imitation ale on the increase. Police unable to detect micro breweries. 0
weematt 12.11.12 5:00pm
BBC tea lady to "fill role" of DG in mornings 2
Drylaw 12.11.12 4:54pm