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Somerset village doesn't welcome careful drivers 1
Oxbridge 4 years

Curry Mallet, a village of 302 in southern Somerset, has broken ranks with the rest of England's small settlements by announcing publicly that it does not want drivers to go through it whether they...

Lenin appears to talk live on Russian TV. Sits on Ray Allan's knee. 0
pinxit 4 years

Golshevik Gollocks...

'We had to be brutal'. BP finally seal oil leak with Dutch cap. 0
pinxit 4 years

No more anon...

Merciful judge inspires Polanski to join Swiss priesthood. More soon. 2
Chip Paper 4 years
C of E CRISIS: Rowan Williams ordains Gok Wan as 'Enforcer' 0
pinxit 4 years

'No problemo, girlfriends!'...

Every Lidl Helps 1
Doctor Moptop 4 years

In a bid to combat accusations of an elitist grocery system, David Cameron has ordered the Home Secretary to investigate why there are no decent supermarkets in London. On Saturday, the Prime...

People from Barnsley and Rotherham to be fitted with subtitles, 5
Zadok the second 4 years
Police informer Raoul Moat could not just help himself in giving the police one 0
arrghgarry 4 years

last vital piece of information...

Circus bear trainer buys his animals a portable forest 0
arrghgarry 4 years

is there any more ?...

Local farmer offering use of field warned not to tempt fete 0
MaverickRat 4 years

A local farmer who offered free use of his top field, along with a P.A system from his mobile disco days has been warned not to tempt fete by the church festival organising committee...

Association of sleeping policemen say they’ll “No longer take things lying down” 1
AndyP 4 years

Proposed government cuts to the number of sleeping policemen have caused an outrage in the traffic calming community. Phillip Hammond has recently warned that all aspects of transport must bear...

Facebook launches new Paedo-ville game. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 4 years
"Essential for bishops to have willies" says Church of England 16
rickwestwell 4 years

Senior figures in the Church of England today called for an end to the speculation and disagreement over the ordination of women bishops, in a statement which decrees once and for all that bishops...

Moat latest: now Cheryl Gascoigne may tell her side of story - if money right 0
StoopyDeGunt 4 years
Dickens couldn't write engaging content, say research by digital marketing guru 2
StoopyDeGunt 4 years

New research by a digital marketing agency has confirmed what many wise young people knew all along - the classics sucked and Dickens, Shakespeare and the other lot would fail miserably in today's...

Roman Prorapelanski has been freed to rape and sodomize again 3
arrghgarry 4 years

but not in America ,after offering the female reporter a drink(which she wisely refused)...

Critics acclaim new range of Vivienne Westwood ice lolly sticks 0
StoopyDeGunt 4 years

[insert plain picture of ice lolly stick] First she changed the face of rock and roll. Then she revolutionised the fashion world. Now iconic design legend Vivienne Westwood is set to capture the...

Aliens Accused of Conspiracy Theorist's Death 2
Doctor Moptop 4 years

Conspiracy theorists across the universe were plunged into mourning after the death of the New World Order supremo David Ikon was announced earlier today. Sources are divided as to whether Ikon was...

Police organised disorganised response to organised crime, say police 0
QorbeQ 4 years

Brewery also lacking deranged drinking session...

Furore as Widow Twanky ordained as priest 2
jp1885 4 years

No more soon (love this idea, but can't be arsed to write it up)...

NHS to become "coin operated". More soon. 0
FormerlyAlOPecia 4 years
Officials seek ways to double the number of tigers in the world. 2
The All New Jeni B 4 years

Vow to count them pissed. More tigersh shoon hic...

Revealed - Ant and Dec refused permission to plead with Moat 0
DiscoPope74 4 years

It has emerged that cheeky chappy light entertainment duo Ant and Dec were refused permission by Northumberland police to try and talk to murdering, gun-nut maniac Raoul Moat on Friday night in an...

Ministry for Education removes failure from the curriculum 0
pricklyhedgehog72 4 years

The Ministry for Education revealed a plan to increase the levels of student performance in British schools today by eliminating what it identified as the bane of the modern classroom, failure. ...

Channel Four decide against showing Raoul Moat’s “Deal Or No Deal” Game 0
hero2zero 4 years
OED to redefine Intuitive as 'BLOODY infuriating trial and error process' 1
StoopyDeGunt 4 years

Microsoft has helped to change the meaning of another word in the English language, with the new definition of the word Intuitive now being officially recognised by the Oxford English Dictionary....

Lindsay Lohan can’t find a new lawyer, millions in debt, no one gives a f*** 1
ironbridgeboy 4 years

No more please...

TV Celebrity Chef ends Supermarket Endorsement Deal 2
Dangerfield 4 years

At the centre of the row that led to the end of the endorsement deal was the packaging on a line of organic sausages. The celebrity felt that the prominence of the wording "Prick with a fork" was...

'Let's have an end to factions', demands one of the competing Miliband brothers. 1
allmyownstunts 4 years
Facebook agrees to Picnic button. 0
simonjmr 4 years

Thousands of impromtu alfresco dining events popped up across the UK at the weekend as a result. More flashmob picnics are expected next weekend...