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Metropolitan Police posts plastic bullets to protestors 0
nickb 09.11.11 8:20am
X Factor contestant confesses "I wasn't on a journey, just in a singing contest" 0
dvo4fun 09.11.11 8:16am
Now lawyers vow to seek prosecution of Michael Jackson’s plastic surgeons

Following the successful conviction of Michael Jackson’s doctor, Conrad Murray, by a Los Angeles court, prosecutors have confirmed that they are intending to bring the pop star’s plastic surgeons...

Stan 09.11.11 7:36am
Dickens or Shakespeare
Barking dog employs writers to produce "new material"

woof woof woof woof woof woof howwwwl!...

Nick McCarr 09.11.11 12:51am
Nick McCarr
GPs complain patient appointments interfere with social engagements

As average salaries top £106k, GPs are finding it increasingly difficult to fit in patient appointments between trips to the opera and games of golf. 'We do like to see the odd one when we can but...

vertical 09.11.11 12:13am
Government cuts "We just won't creosote it this year" says Minister of Defence 5
dvo4fun 08.11.11 11:51pm
Simulated Mars mission ‘Real’ claim conspiracy theorists. 11
JETFAB 08.11.11 10:44pm
Berlusconi - "Can I have a leaving party?" 0
bonjonelson 08.11.11 10:38pm
Prison officers 'disappointed' by discovery of drugs and prostitutes

As scrawled signs reading 'pussy loans at reesonibble rates' and 'dons discount dope den' were being removed today, prison officers were denying that Ford Open Prison's new regime is way too lax...

vertical 08.11.11 10:11pm
Poor transfer market activity blamed for European financial crisis

Ex-footballer and pundit, Mark 'Lawro' Lawrenson, has today presented his analysis of the European financial collapse in the SunSport analysis column. Blaming a lack of constructive activity in the...

kga6 08.11.11 8:20pm
Blake gets the needle as Amy Winehouse's personal effects go up for sale. 0
dominic_mcg 08.11.11 8:17pm
Hajj up date - as Muslims throw stones at Satan, asteroid heads towards earth 0
medici2471 08.11.11 7:30pm
EU meltdown, UKIP's Farage determined to keep feet on the ground 0
medici2471 08.11.11 7:24pm
Papandreou blames low self-esteem for vote of no confidence 0
kga6 08.11.11 6:53pm
‘Carbon Dating Agency’ coming to Britain.

A new Dating agency with a unique twist is preparing to propel itself into the UK market., Already a success in former Soviet states and France ‘Carbon Dating Agency’ takes a DNA sample from all...

DavidBlame 08.11.11 6:48pm
Jacko doc's treatments 'beyond the pale' says Judge. 0
MADJEZ 08.11.11 6:35pm
Nick Griffin blackballed over White's membership 0
reforse 08.11.11 6:23pm
MINI begins production of rival to US Army’s Abrams tanks

BMW MINI have confirmed that they have started work on a range of main battle tanks in an attempt to break into the lucrative defence market. CEO Ian Robertson is delighted with what he is calling...

Vertically Challenged Giant 08.11.11 6:13pm
Mexican court sentences prostitute to six months of freedom. 7
bonjonelson 08.11.11 5:30pm
Newcastle 'Poppy Appeal' hit as Mike Ashley statue fund continues to grow.

The Royal British Legion expressed dismay tonight, as this years 'Poppy Appeal' collection in Newcastle was well below expected figures. Capt Newbridge put the shortfall down to the 'Ashley' effect....

Bryan with a Y 08.11.11 5:27pm
Bryan with a Y
Eurozone typo: Trillion Euro cheque payed into an Athenian geek's bank account 0
dvo4fun 08.11.11 5:26pm
Martin McGuiness latest to promote Team GB football shirt.

more to follow...

Bryan with a Y 08.11.11 5:24pm
Bryan with a Y
3 French Hens,2 Turtle Doves and Partridge in Pear Tree found in Mexican Prison

Search likely to continue for at least 8 more days, possibly until Christmas say Police...

Mathna 08.11.11 5:23pm
Daily Mail to help Theresa May with immigrant numbers missed by Borders Agency 6
dvo4fun 08.11.11 5:18pm
Al OPecia
Italy to be twinned with Shit Creek

Possibly deeper later...

virtuallywill 08.11.11 4:58pm
Clothing torture caused by barbed wire labels, retailer finally admits

In a sensational move, an anonymous high street retailer has broken ranks and confessed that clothes labels, as many consumers had suspected, are manufactured from a fabric that is 97.5% barbed wire....

Clarky 08.11.11 4:51pm
Giant astral haemorrhoid threatens Earth 0
simonjmr 08.11.11 4:40pm
Cocozza joins list of X factor victims

Brookstein, Ward, Lewis, Jackson, Burke, McElderry, Cardle and now Cocozza "So I did a little drugs, but lets face it you need something the smooth the edges and keep you going through doing that...

simonjmr 08.11.11 4:36pm
"Motorway" 6
dvo4fun 08.11.11 4:33pm
Benefits cheat clairvoyant didn't see 33k repayment coming

how the hell do these people get away with it for so long...

vertical 08.11.11 4:30pm
John Ffitch-Rucker