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Eating 4 bananas on Sunday leads to mental illness, new research reveals

Researchers at the British Institute for Advanced Statistics (BIAS) have today revealed research that links eating exactly four (no more, no less) bananas on Sundays to certain mental health...

glass90 11.04.11 2:10pm
John Wiltshire
All playing fields to be levelled to give them a level playing field

The government has annouced that all playng fields in the UK must be level, so that they have a level playing field., A spokesman said: 'In order to compete, we must have a level playing field. And...

John Wiltshire 11.04.11 1:44pm
LIberal party to release DVD box set "Ideologoical u-turns 1" 1
simonjmr 11.04.11 1:45pm
Hundreds of French brides arrested in veil crackdown

Weddings all over France were disrupted as police arrested brides who had covered their faces with veils., A member of the Gendarme explained: 'Good moaning. We were just pissing the wodding, when I...

John Wiltshire 11.04.11 12:38pm
John Wiltshire
Nation prepares for day of street parties to celebrate AV referendum

The British people are preparing to bring out the bunting for a day of street parties, fetes and carnivals to celebrate the chance to express their views on electoral reform. ‘May the 5th will be...

Ludicity 13.04.11 1:18pm
John Wiltshire
Ned Flanders buys controlling stake in Arsenal

thackaray 11.04.11 12:27pm
Saudi Arabia makes smelling of garlic illegal 0
greg various 11.04.11 12:15pm
greg various
U2 regain their number one status

U2 have regained the crown for the most irritating band, knocking Coldplay into second after what seems like eternity. Bono produced an incredible performance of self satisfied smugness on another...

MC One R 11.04.11 12:08pm
MC One R
Archbishop refuses to switch doors to manual

Rowan Williams confirmed last night he'd turned down a "five-figure donation to the organ fund" in return for intoning  "This is your sky pilot speaking. Please watch the  following safety...

NewSuburbanDad 12.04.11 7:59am
French goverment ban all public face covering

virtuallywill 11.04.11 11:34am
Greenpeace: Support for French Save the Veil campaign was a 'misunderstanding' 0
Skylarking 11.04.11 11:07am
Jehovah's WItnesses in Kingdom Hall fracas

Several Jehovah's Witnesses were involved in a brutal clash yesterday morning when their weekly praise session was rudely interrupted by several drunken six pack wielding Football fans, draped in...

simonjmr 15.06.12 2:40pm
Nails UK
Bulls, Bears and Stags to be ring-fenced, says London Stock Exchange 0
pinxit 11.04.11 10:07am
Banks immediately claim new "ring-fence" as tangible asset. 1
Qoxiivi 11.04.11 11:28am
Report advises High Street Banks to keep customers, that's it. 0
Ian Searle 11.04.11 9:48am
Ian Searle
Gaddafi rendered unconscious after he forgot to open sunroof to greet supporters 0
Basil_B 11.04.11 9:47am
High Street Banks advised to keep customers money in separate shoe box. 0
Ian Searle 11.04.11 9:47am
Ian Searle
Lift company's annual accounts show that last year was "a bit up and down". 3
MC One R 11.04.11 9:46am
MC One R
Number of flip-flops worn during March reach record levels, a study shows. 0
MC One R 11.04.11 8:54am
MC One R
Investment bank bonuses to be ringfenced from potential retail bank losses. 8
MC One R 11.04.11 11:35am
MC One R
Coalition concedes that Library Book Thefts 'Taken as Read' 0
11.04.11 8:24am
Kate Middleton's mum to give safety demonstration at royal wedding

Buckingham Palace announced today that, due to health and safety requirements, Carole Middleton will be giving a safety demonstration to the congregation at her daughter's wedding to Prince William.,...

John Wiltshire 11.04.11 2:24pm
Audi driver allegedly spotted "not tailgating slower car". More soon. 5
MC One R 11.04.11 8:48am
John Wiltshire
Banking Commission to offer banks feature-rich firewall software for only $99 0
Duncan Biscuit 11.04.11 8:18am
Duncan Biscuit
US takeover could make Arsenal ‘the new Aston Villa’ insists new owner 0
Duncan Biscuit 11.04.11 8:17am
Duncan Biscuit
Hiccup as AU road map for Libyan peace left in glove box of Tripoli hire car 0
Duncan Biscuit 11.04.11 8:16am
Duncan Biscuit
US takeover sees Arsenal rebranded The Top Gunners 0
Duncan Biscuit 11.04.11 8:15am
Duncan Biscuit
Much hyped Microsoft Crash Solution turns out to be "Turn it off and on again". 3
BillyBitzer 13.04.11 1:25am
Nick McCarr
Ozzy Osbourne sacked as Wayne Rooney's speech coach

More f%$*?@g soon...

Ian Searle 11.04.11 7:54am
Ian Searle
Warm weather continues-children advised slam doors previously left open in cold 0
Ian Searle 11.04.11 7:38am
Ian Searle