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Rooneys thin hair after transplant blamed on wrongly prescribed obesity tablets 0
Basil_B 23.08.11 9:25am
Basil_B
Cameron becomes Britain's first airmiles millionaire. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 23.08.11 9:18am
dominic_mcg
Megalomaniac ousted from burning compound: whereabouts of Branson uncertain 0
Stan 23.08.11 9:01am
Stan
BBC programme scheduling launches BBC1 + 1 year

The height of Saturday TV for 2007 (insert current year here) Doctor Who, then Strictly Come Dancing and Casualty Only rivalled by "ITV + 1 year" Big Saturday Night In, X-Factor...

1
brownpaperreporter 23.08.11 8:52am
Solanki and Mawhinney
IRA send Gaddafi their support with a Happy Ramadan card 0
yussle 23.08.11 8:29am
yussle
Media celebrates end of Gadaffi with 24 hour coverage.... Oh he's still there.

More half cocked celebrations soon...

0
MADJEZ 23.08.11 8:16am
MADJEZ
Gaddafi ducks. More soon. 1
Al OPecia 23.08.11 8:14am
MADJEZ
Iron Man movie success paves way for Toaster and Kettle Man films

[More from the kitchen soon]...

0
dicky37 23.08.11 8:12am
dicky37
EU ruling states that “Cabbage” no longer the standard for vegetative state

“While a brain can be pea-like, as you English say” European Commission health expert M. Truffaud says that the mental state of “Vegetable” can no longer be broad-brushed with the label of...

1
brownpaperreporter 23.08.11 7:58am
Griffin
Nectar points to count towards final score, say UCAS. 0
the coarse whisperer 23.08.11 7:01am
the coarse whisperer
Student receives points deduction from UCAS after going into administration.

Basingstoke sixth-former Jake Andrews admitted he was ‘gutted’ today after receiving a 200 point deduction from higher education admittance agency UCAS for becoming financially insolvent. This...

0
Corrigan 23.08.11 12:51am
Corrigan
Royal Society for Ornithology to change name of sea gulls to sea bastards

In light of the increasing threat that sea gulls are currently posing for tourists in coastal towns around Britain by attacking them for food the Royal Society for Ornithology have agreed to rename...

2
Basil_B 22.08.11 11:40pm
rikkor
New iPhone app calculates calories from the pictures of your food 2
Dumbnews 22.08.11 11:31pm
Jammydodgers
Actress sacked from Vagina Monologues for talking out of her arse.

Grabs tin hat, dives under the table...

6
wallster 22.08.11 10:39pm
dominic_mcg
UN to consider 'Charities Continued Responsibilities' proposal

A coalition of ecology groups say they are a step closer to convincing the United Nations to abolishing the World Health Organisation and forcing humanitarian charities to cease their work saving...

0
Mrblacker 22.08.11 8:02pm
Mrblacker
God to attend...

God to attend lightning and thunderbolt accuracy retraining as he 'misses that bastard Branson'...

0
writinginbsl 22.08.11 7:30pm
writinginbsl
Ad campaign music lauded by industry insiders as “brilliantly missing the point"

Enterprising advertising creative working on the next campaign for high street electrical goods retailer Currys have been widely praised for their choice of music to appear in 30 second television...

0
swordfish trombone 22.08.11 6:55pm
swordfish trombone
USA declares war on Gaddafi regime.

Couldn’t resist it...

3
be reasonable 22.08.11 6:52pm
sharpehuntersmanylogins
Cameron appeals for "calm" so he can at least finish one holiday this year

David Cameron has today called for “calm” throughout the world and at home, after yet another holiday was interrupted so he could return to London to chair a meeting of the National Security...

10
simonjmr 22.08.11 6:02pm
rikkor
Toffee nosed QPR chew over Scouse Toffees.

Everton fans were left fuming after the Toffees were turned over by a makeshift QPR side at Goodison Park on saturday. Charlie Scally, writing in the Scouse Echo, called QPR "a bag of shite" and...

0
rebel not taken 22.08.11 5:57pm
rebel not taken
Scientist finally prove that death will kill you. More soon. 0
martin2381 22.08.11 5:15pm
martin2381
Gerard Depardieu called in to help with Somali drought. More soon 2
martin2381 22.08.11 5:09pm
martin2381
Twitter Latest - Murray Not Boring Insists His Mum

Fresh from his ATP triumph in the Cincinnati Open yesterday, dour Scot and as some would have it British No.1, Andy Murray, was defended by his Mum on Twitter as not being in the least bit boring....

0
Duff 22.08.11 4:17pm
Duff
No takers on Isle of White's 'asylum for anyone' offer 0
spoole2112 22.08.11 3:40pm
spoole2112
Westminster Council to evict 70 year old looter's mother. 3
bonjonelson 22.08.11 3:36pm
charitynjw
Wilsons of Sharrow to sponsor snuff movies 0
simonjmr 22.08.11 3:21pm
simonjmr
New iPhone app tells you if it still works after being dropped 0
Dumbnews 22.08.11 2:57pm
Dumbnews
Man hit by ambulance raises possibility of other ironic accidents

After a man was hit by an ambulance resonding to an emergency call today, experts are warning that similarly ironic accidents are a real and present danger. A top government boffin has been quoted as...

0
Spartan_Pig 22.08.11 2:42pm
Spartan_Pig
Lower order England Batsmen gripe "We don't get to have a bat - it's not fair!" 0
dvo4fun 22.08.11 2:35pm
dvo4fun
Growing Indian grain mountain seeks a silo 0
spoole2112 22.08.11 2:19pm
spoole2112