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Tottenham uprising is Britain's Rosa Parks moment says Millband speech 1st draft

As Tottenham's rioters looted Dixons and Currys last night, for much needed electrical consumer goods, they stood on the shoulders of Rosa Parks, Martin Luther King and Nelson Mandala, Ed Miliband...

ronseal 08.08.11 6:37am
IMF chief sex assault upgraded to XXX 0
Dumbnews 08.08.11 3:37am
Markets panic as S&P downgrades US credit from Epic to Awesome 0
Dumbnews 08.08.11 3:03am
New online poll forces parliametary debate on the return of the Ducking Stool

After an online petition reached 100,000 signatures, the House of Commons will be forced to debate the return of the Ducking Stool. Popular targets of misogyny, including Cherie Blair, Ann...

ronseal 07.08.11 11:16pm
Small Business Federation Calls For Local Looters For Local Shops.

(Or Local Shops For Local Looters?)...

The All New Jeni B 07.08.11 10:59pm
It Started With a Riot by Our Fashion Correspondent

Good things can come out of bad..yes even out of riots. Who'd have thought it? "Ma main man" pimp-rolling down the High Street in a slightly stained brown checked sports jacket with 5 year-old...

Drylaw 07.08.11 10:00pm
PM Dave & George Want To Say A Big, Big Thankyou To All Our Friends In The North

..Who have gone the extra mile, above and beyond the call of duty re their splendid efforts to keep UK PLC solvent, by taking on the burden of extra cuts and higher unemployment, compared to the...

Jesse Bigg 07.08.11 6:03pm
The All New Jeni B
Old Etonians riot against polar bear brutality

P.M. gives full backing...

greg various 07.08.11 5:21pm
greg various
Daily Telegraph: "Polar bear attack: tribute to 'strong, fearless' son"

"It is such a shame. My son was brave and strong - he even managed to take out a few of theirs before being shot", said Daddy Polar Bear...

Izziere 07.08.11 4:43pm
the coarse whisperer
Harry Redknapp's vocabulary looted in Tottenham riots.

Harry Redknapp's vocabulary has been looted and left for brown bread by tea leaves during the Tottenham riots. "The toe rags have half inched all my favourite words" said a down in the north and...

rebel not taken 07.08.11 3:34pm
rebel not taken
PETA concerned as 23 seals and 7 Afghans and a whirly bird is killed 0
guffaw 07.08.11 2:16pm
Leaving hazelnut based chocolate bar in car is hot topic on Google

more later...

virtuallywill 07.08.11 12:57pm
Rebekah Brooks to star in Last Night I Went to Wapping Again.

Sexy, flame haired, femme fatale Rebekah Brooks is to star as a modern day Rebecca in an updated film version of the classic Daphne Du Maurier melodrama. The blockbuster movie, Last Night I Went To...

rebel not taken 07.08.11 12:19pm
rebel not taken
Guardian reports "Police on street after ironing"

retraction later...

virtuallywill 07.08.11 11:37am
The British Spring exploded yesterday in Tottenham. Ministers flee abroad...

As civil order collapses Prime Minister Cameron has already flown to Italy...

Awkward Facts 07.08.11 10:49am
Awkward Facts
US solves global economic crisis by making trite Hollywood film about it

American policy-makers were celebrating last night after coming up with a solution to the world debt crisis., The White House signed an 11th-hour deal forcing Disney, Pixar and DreamWorks to...

FraserWords 07.08.11 10:43am
"Tory Government's Looting And Robbing Cause Of Tottenham Riot,".....

say experts...

Jesse Bigg 07.08.11 10:27am
Jesse Bigg
Tragic accidental death of Richard Hammond to close current run of Top Gear

Popular motoring presenter Richard Hammond is to be accidentally killed in a tragic ratings-boosting episode of Top Gear to end the current series. Exact details have yet to emerge although the...

nickb 07.08.11 10:17am
Cameron Urges Tottenham Rioters To Buy His.......

.."Big Society" balloons...

Jesse Bigg 07.08.11 9:50am
Jesse Bigg
New 'inflate-a-pool' convinces Google sat-cams that you're mega rich

New inflate-a-pool technology, that looks like an outdoor pool to Google Earth's satellite cameras, is helping recession hit Brits to keep up with the Cyber Jones in their twin towns. 'Croydon has...

ronseal 07.08.11 8:40am
pere floza
Olympic torch to be replaced with flame-effect replica on the Tottenham stretch

just in case....

pere floza 07.08.11 8:34am
pere floza
Redknapp optimistic as Tottenham put in strong performance in riot season opener

Tottenham boss, Harry Redknapp is said to be 'Over the moon' with his team's confident start to the new riot season. Despite a stiff defence by the Metropolitan Police, the Spurs squad were able to...

wallster 07.08.11 7:06am
Jeffrey Archer and Johan Hari arrested as police try to avert Copy Cat riots 0
ronseal 06.08.11 10:29pm
Children’s entertainers ‘Kompletely Krackers’ split over comedic differences

The world of children’s entertainment was in shock today following the announcement that Mike Lamb and Brent Logan, better known as ‘Kompletely Krackers’ are to end their 20 year partnership...

antharrison 06.08.11 8:12pm
News Of The World phone hacker hacks mother-in-law to death.

News Of The World reader Ted Snivel has hacked his mother-in-law to death in Bognor Regis. Mr Snivel, who boasted to neighbours that he worked for M15, claims to have been under massive stress...

rebel not taken 06.08.11 6:53pm
Anti-fracking protesters told to 'frack off' 0
Christopher Frost 06.08.11 6:31pm
Christopher Frost
Worthing pensioners caught in Doggy position.

Retired cinema usherette Marjorie Fosdyke-Spratt has set tongues wagging in Worthing. Miss Fosdyke-Spratt, who is 102, was discovered under West Pier slumped over her zimmer frame with her knickers...

rebel not taken 06.08.11 6:11pm
rebel not taken
David Schneider set to join Manchester City 0
Christopher Frost 06.08.11 4:53pm
Christopher Frost
Market report

Apologies for digging out my own old stuff, but [url=]this[/url] seems quite apt at present...

Des Custard 06.08.11 4:47pm
Des Custard
Eton. 4
Screenie 06.08.11 2:31pm