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Police grant sex toy amnesty in preparation for use of plastic bullets. 3
Milo Shame 09.08.11 5:28pm
Screenie
Shanklin disturbances blamed on 4 fiftysomethings stealing pick'n'mix 0
simonjmr 09.08.11 4:52pm
simonjmr
Genuine London shoplifters livlihoods under threat from unlicensed looters 0
simonjmr 09.08.11 4:50pm
simonjmr
London fire crews to be further hampered by hosepipe ban 4
Vertically Challenged Giant 09.08.11 4:48pm
Screenie
Apple to compete with Blackberry through release of iRiot App 2
Screenie 09.08.11 4:47pm
Screenie
Riot footage causes Nick Griffin's micropenis to become erect 0
Christopher Frost 09.08.11 4:19pm
Christopher Frost
Panic on the streets of London, Panic on the streets of Birmingham...

Chris Moyles and DLT in hiding...

5
charlies_hat 09.08.11 4:07pm
button
London MP's ask advice from countryside colleagues on how to build a moat. 0
Milo Shame 09.08.11 4:06pm
Milo Shame
Pepys blogs while London burns 0
Christopher Frost 09.08.11 4:05pm
Christopher Frost
Burberry to give away a free brick with every hoodie 0
Screenie 09.08.11 3:42pm
Screenie
Mayor takes broom out of own arse just in time to help with clean-up. 0
Milo Shame 09.08.11 3:40pm
Milo Shame
'Can't-be-arsed' anarchist, 60, loots his own fridge

No more later...

0
Crow 09.08.11 3:36pm
Crow
COBRA committee authorises Police to use live cobras for crowd control.

Here's hoping...

0
bonjonelson 09.08.11 3:29pm
bonjonelson
Riot Police to be issued with polar bears

Rioters in London’s inner cities have been warned that if they engage in any more trouble the police will release a polar bear. ‘We have been more than patient with these people,’ said Home...

10
Ludicity 09.08.11 3:28pm
Screenie
Cameron welcomes return of "the Biltz Spirit". more soon. 0
Al OPecia 09.08.11 3:25pm
Al OPecia
Londoners braced for return of UB40. 0
wallster 09.08.11 3:07pm
wallster
"We're all in this together," says Cameron from bath full of turds. 0
Drylaw 09.08.11 3:06pm
Drylaw
Looters caught by TV Licensing van. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 09.08.11 2:41pm
dominic_mcg
Metropolitan police officers to crank up their faces

In light of the continued violence and rioting across London the Metropolitan police have taken the unprecedented step of increasing their police officer's powers to look on from unimpressed to...

2
Screenie 09.08.11 2:18pm
Screenie
London Riots... 6
Screenie 09.08.11 2:13pm
Screenie
Lack of £1 coins for trolleys thwarts Tesco looters 1
Duncan Biscuit 09.08.11 2:10pm
writinginbsl
City unrest spreads to Norwich as youths drop litter and cycle on the pavement 1
charlies_hat 09.08.11 2:07pm
writinginbsl
Sky TV buys rights to "Child criminals do the stupidest things"

Another budget show curtesy of CCTV...

0
Erlang 09.08.11 1:48pm
Erlang
Copycat indignation engulfs Tunbridge Wells 3
greg various 09.08.11 1:42pm
Des Custard
Riots over. It was all a bet!

It has been admitted that the real reason for the outbreak of rioting in London was a £1 bet between two 15-year old gang leaders in the city as to whether they could get the PM and MPs back from...

0
Awkward Facts 09.08.11 12:50pm
Awkward Facts
Olympic Committee to review CCTV looting footage for future ‘fencing’ stars 1
Qoxiivi 09.08.11 12:49pm
Screenie
Police use CCTV footage to identify looters too stupid to cover their face 0
Vertically Challenged Giant 09.08.11 12:48pm
Vertically Challenged Giant
Updated AA Riotplanner available via any good social networking site 0
Iamthestig 09.08.11 12:46pm
Iamthestig
England clear winner of the prize for World's youngest criminals.

A generation of effort by planners in the education, justice and child-care systems has been rewarded with the greatest density of under-age villains in cities since Columbia's street urchins were...

0
Awkward Facts 09.08.11 12:29pm
Awkward Facts
Eton to extend hand of friendship to Polar Bear families.

In a dramatic move yesterday, the governors of elite Eton College announced a new Polar Scholarship programme. Under the proposed scheme, Polar Bear youngsters, or "cubs", who exhibit the right...

1
Drylaw 09.08.11 12:21pm
Quimby69