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Gordon Brown tells Guardian "It wasn't my smile being used during the election" 0
Iamthestig 4 years

Former PM Gordon Brown has told the Guardian newspaper he did not use his own smile during the 2010 election campaign. Mr. Brown has admitted he didn't actually smile for the entire campaign, and is...

Roger Daltrey addresses US Senators and says "Who Are You??" 0
Sharpehunter 4 years
Nick Robinson challenges Robert Peston to a "Smug off" 2
Rorschach 4 years

Londonners told to keep calm, stay indoors and wait for them to disappear up their own arseholes...

Gimp mask sales collapse blamed on knob gags 0
andhrimnir 4 years
Headless chicken spotted running about like a mildly overworked office manager. 1
Zadok the second 4 years
One in the eye for France as Norway re-take long gism record 0
andhrimnir 4 years
1 in every 36 Nectar Points is a fake 1
Tristan Shout 4 years
Owners 'mimic movements of their dogs' scientific findings vindicate Polanski. 1
pinxit 4 years

Old dog, new tricks...

Microsoft launches lick-screen version of Windows 7 1
newbietryer 4 years

“Analysis shows our core consumer base consists of people who choose to lick windows” - Spokesperson More Later...

Asbos to be replaced by compulsory street dance 2
Ludicity 4 years

Young offenders who would have been issued with Anti-Social Behaviour Orders will have to serve time performing street dance, the Home Office have announced. ‘Everyone knows that street dance...

Comedian McIntyre dies on stage in self pleasuring incident 1
uddertucker 4 years

The comedy world is today in a state of slightly detached and ironic mourning after bizarrely popular gagsmith Michael McIntyre asphyxiated on stage laughing at his own joke. Witnesses reported how...

One in every 36 pockets with a pound in is a Harold Wilson 2
Griffin 4 years
"On your mobility scooter" says Tebbit 0
2000something 4 years

Former Conservative Chairman Norman Tebbit entered the debate on the abolition of the compulsory retirement age this morning. In a speech to the Conservative Way Backward group, the dragon bothering...

'British war effort not hampered by national debt', says government. 10
SingingHinny 4 years

The MOD has denied accusations that Britain can no longer afford the war in Afghanistan despite furnishing its parachute regiments with oversized golf umbrellas. ‘Our top priority is the safety of...

Madman gets the hump over traffic calming measures! 0
Converter 4 years

Local resident Frederick March is ‘up in arms’ over recent traffic calming measures introduced recently. “Don’t they know I am one of a dying breed of loners steeped in paranoia?”...

Sting see's airport luggage thieves arrested. 2
Basil_B 4 years

He then went onto call the rest of the Police where upon Stuart Copeland arrested the tea ladies and Andy Summers apprehended the stewards...

TV 'News Raider' fatman named. Eamonn Holmes 'uncontrite'. 0
pinxit 4 years

"Fierce hungry for publicity, so I was"...

Egg thrower bound over to keep the peace 1
MrChigleysAunt 4 years
Gardener’s winning bush topiary Royal Show entry created from wife’s pubic hair 5
Stan Laurel 4 years

There were blushes at the annual Sandringham Flower Show yesterday, when it was realised that the winning entry for the bush topiary section had been created from the pubic hair of the successful...

Ch 4 warns 'Remember the Noughties' clip show "only months away" 5
Golgo13 4 years

A mere 7 months into the current decade and the traditional cold contempt felt for the decade before the one you're in has already melted into the warmth of golden nostalgia in the case of the...

Privately-educated Michael Gove says 'rich, thick kids' do better than 1
arrghgarry 4 years

poor clever children ,look at me ...

BBC announce new channel "Whipping Boy." 4
mrlemoncurry 4 years

The BBC have announced the introduction of a new television channel that will just be dedicated to apologies . The channel to be called ,"Whipping boy, "which will start transmission in September...

More parents likely to disappear as child abduction peaks, warns Government. 1
SingingHinny 4 years

The Government has warned parents to be on their guard after predicting that the number of child abductions will peak during the summer holidays. Whilst such abductions are still poorly understood,...

BBC accuses David Cameron of political bias. More soon. 0
QorbeQ 4 years
Enquiries accused of being watered down to be held at O2 Arena. 0
Basil_B 4 years
Man obsessed with taking things apart and putting them back together 7
newbietryer 4 years

A London man has revealed his life-long obsession of unnecessarily taking things apart and putting them back together. Unemployed Carl Winston (34) admits it has had a profound effect on his...

Night Gardens Upsy Daisy in Playboy deal 2
newbietryer 4 years

More Later...

Black Country to be renamed "Native West Midlands" 0
andhrimnir 4 years
google ad clueless aboute site content 4
4ty2 4 years

newsbisciut page content leaves google out of their wits in what advert to feature. After about nearly a minute delay it came up again with, single, having recently featured employing a...

Pakistan snubs David Cameron, invites Nick Griffin to garden party 0
QorbeQ 4 years