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Net migration to UK rises in 2009 0
deskpilot3 4 years

Vince Cable curious to understand how migrants get in via the 'net...

Freelancing MI6 agent stuffed, stiffed then zipped. More soon. 1
Hunter F. Thompson 4 years

Or is it "stiffed, stuffed, then"?...

Glee at Daily Mail as migration to UK soars 20%. Sales predicted to rise 50%. 0
uddertucker 4 years

"They're probably all gay single mums, or black, or both" claimed nonsensefuhrer Paul Dacre. "They come over here with their EU leaflets telling them how to claim benefits, they steal our women,...

Advertisement feature: Boomerang Ltd presents the Doofer™ 1
ChrisHarrison 4 years

Sick of losing the remote control? Had enough of getting comfortable and then realising you’ve left the damned thing on the other side of the room? Boomerang Ltd has the solution. Our boffins have...

Domestic strife as pot raises doubts over ethnicity of kettle 0
pinxit 4 years
King-maker Nick Clegg exported to Austrlia 4
KimKali 4 years

"Very progressive" trade talks are underway. More soon...

Suan Boyle to sing for the Pope ,a dream come true says the Pope 8
arrghgarry 4 years

as he had always wanted to fuck an old female virgin to complete the set...

Wheelie bin woman claims "Schrodinger" defence. 8
Rorschach 4 years
New Gmail filter marks any email with "Please advise" as spam 0
Dumbnews 4 years
Abused Expense Staff Fight Back 0
Blobvilla 4 years

Staff of the Independent Parliamentary Standards Authority that have had to withstand four letter tirades from MP’s submitting expense claims fought back yesterday. The claim handlers became fed up...

New M&S autumn range reflects catwalk look, Moss Bros expected to follow suit 0
dicky37 4 years

[More soon]...

Builders Roofing Course "Shoddy" say delegates 1
RichT 4 years

A course on re-tiling roof's was dismissed as "shoddy" by delegates who attended it today. The Instructor Lead course, which was held in the living room of 84 year old Margeret Blakelaw's Bungalow...

Fugitive Nadir returns to Big Brother house 0
4 years

Business tycoon Asil Nadir is planning to return to the UK to face his overdue trial in the popular TV reality show Big Brother. Nadir fled the country 17 years ago, ironically before the show had...

Cherrie and family in turmoil as Tony joins witness program 0
hero2zero 4 years

A man named only as Tony, anticipating appearing as a star witness in a possible inquiry over actions in recent UK military involvements has expressed interest in entering a witness protection and...

Angry Pope responds to IRA bomb cover up storm.. 0
Sharpehunter 4 years

We consulted the good book and prayed for guidance and at the time sending Father Chesney to Donegal was considered to be a pretty good substitue to 'Hell on Earth', have you ever been there for...

Oddie to build on success of Badger Watch with Badger Belt and Cufflinks Set 8
dicky37 4 years

[More soon. Perhaps even a Badger tie]...

Government to shake up Milk Industry: Cheese Industry may be affected 4
virtuallywill 4 years

Churned out nice again...

York asks Duchess to change to either Salford, Burnley or Hunslet. 1
Ostsee 4 years
I opened a wheelie bin this morning and a wasp flew out 2
riesler 4 years

.what sort of sick person puts a wasp in a wheelie bin!!!...

Noam Chomsky to become new X Factor judge 1
Ludicity 4 years

Professor of linguistics and political campaigner Noam Chomsky has been confirmed as the new judge on TV talent show The X Factor. ‘Cheryl Cole was still recovering from malaria and we needed...

China in talks with Endamol to screen Big Brother House Arrest 0
simonjmr 4 years
MIstaken identity leads to Nadir entering Big Brother house 0
simonjmr 4 years
Man found submerged in holdall may not have died from natural causes, say police 0
Gary Stanton 4 years

Police investigating the death of mathematics graduate Gareth Williams whose body was found in a holdall in the bath say they are treating his death as “suspicious and unexplained” prompting...

Duchess of York to ‘exploit natural talents’ in world of horse training. 2
SingingHinny 4 years

Sarah Ferguson is to forge a new career as a ‘horse whisperer’ after she calmed a steed that had thrown its rider during an event at the Kensington Pony Club. ‘It was spooky,’ said one...

City of York demands less embarrassing duchess 8
jp1885 4 years

The people of York have issued an impassioned plea for a less 'cringeworthingly embarrassing duchess,' following recent revelations that current incumbent tried to solicit money from an undercover...

Crouch turns to beating Young Boys 1
simonjmr 4 years
"Turn to Voodoo" Chile to rescue miners 1
simonjmr 4 years
Josie Gibson of that Big Brother to launch perfume "Me Babbers" in time for xmas 0
simonjmr 4 years
Study proves grass greener on other side, though parking problematic 3
dicky37 4 years

New research warns employees attracted by the promise of a better workplace elsewhere that while the grass may be up to 18% greener over there, this is often the result of having fewer parking spaces...

Swedish sex shop "Ickier" to open in Soho 0
simonjmr 4 years