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World's ugliest man to buy world's most beautiful car. more soon 0
Mrblacker 4 years


Stephen Fry to give Norwich City team-talk via Twitter. more soon 0
Mrblacker 4 years
Premier league a bad influence on children 5
whickerman 4 years

When has coming forth ever been considered a success?...

Suffolk Police to give stolen bikes to offenders 0
hero2zero 4 years

A retired Police Officer said, "In my days that we called it, fitting somebody up!" DI Crabtree, who came up with the idea told us, "Its a case of soft on crime and tough on the victims of crime, I...

Outrage as army manoeuvres disturb Blackpool's memorial to the Unknown Pisser 1
rickwestwell 4 years
‘Noisy party’ was in fact the sound of Feltz's career imploding even further 2
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
Steven Slater was fired by the Airline`s strict Don`t ask don`t tell the world 0
arrghgarry 4 years
Government announces overhaul of Ministry of Sound 2
jp1885 4 years

More soon., Sorry to SingingHinny for nicking his/her idea!...

Bill Gates admits being stumped by the Fn key 0
4 years

An anonymous individual spoke out today of their fury at the ambiguous Fn key. "We have Ctrl," he said. "Why the heck do we need the effing Fn too?", In a statement today, Bill Gates has admitted...

Government accuses Jesus of being the root cause of binge drinking 0
brownpaperreporter 4 years

"Christianity in general and Jesus in particular. Thats where the roots are" Said the statement. "Every child from an early age has it drummed into them, Jesus turns water into wine, why? Because it...

Ghost of Willie Rushton overshoots Mornington Crescent 3
ramblesnake 4 years

'He never was any good at the game.' Says Humph...

Ministry of Defence to dispense with services of Pete Tong and Judge Jules. 0
SingingHinny 4 years
Stephen Fry's silhouette projected into sky when nation faces difficult question 0
la maga 4 years
Army to use Twitter for combat reports in bid to cut costs 0
la maga 4 years
Civil servant says two more Afghan deaths shows MoD is already getting leaner 2
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
MoD intern working on cuts doesn't want to be the one to tell Fox war must go 0
la maga 4 years
Panic as supply of Daily Mail run low - enough warmth for just five more years 1
StoopyDeGunt 4 years

As newspapers die out, scientists have estimated that The Daily Mail might have as little as five years of comfort to provide for Britain., This could have devastating effects for the two opposing...

Digitally remastered film trend continues as Disney release 'Mary Poppouts 3D' 1
pinxit 4 years
School with no pupils tops league tables 1
4 years

The headmistress, Sian Thomas was said to be delighted with the news that her school, which has been in the news for having no pupils, beat all other UK schools in the league tables for top SAT...

Student loan service to issue IOUs to undergraduates 1
4 years

Following a second year of delays in payments to students, the Student loan service has stated that it plans to issue IOUs to students that can be redeemed in Tescos, WHSmiths, corner shops, and will...

Drugs controvesy hits the Olympics as builders are caught taking speed on site 1
Basil_B 4 years

Officials for the games bemoaned the behaviour today of builders guilty of taking the illegal substance known as speed on the site of the Olympic village. ' It's not good enough' remarked an upset...

Veterans from both sides gather to commemorate Battle of the Sexes 3
dicky37 4 years

[They laid a wreath and everything]...

Cameron: 'No going back' as nuclear fuel rods inserted into Clegg 0
pinxit 4 years
Latest Broadway dance hit halted after star develops arrhythmia. 0
SingingHinny 4 years
Apple’s latest must-have device, the iSuck Autovac 0
hero2zero 4 years

Soon to be midnight-over-hyped at your local Apple Store, learn how Apple can put the "S" in suck!...

MOD saves a fortune after finding equipment supplier on ebay. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 4 years
Apple developing iRobot to let you explore distant places from your home 0
Dumbnews 4 years

Apple could rent them from their stores. Then you assume full control of it and have it go wherever you want...

Shares in Sauvignon Blanc go through the roof 0
Scroat 4 years

"This doesn't bode well for our campaign to cut binge drinking," David Cameron said today."Just because some woman's had a baby - oooof!" He added as he was elbowed in the ribs by Sam Cam...

Jeremy Kyle appointed to chair investigation into ‘dysfunctional’ ITV 0
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
The Knowledge to be replaced by SatNav operator skills for London cab drivers 0
simonjmr 4 years