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After chewing off his own arm ,smart arse reflects and wishes he had asked the 2
Malcum eggs 4 years

reality camera crew for help...

Entire Barmy Army arrested for breaking Geneva Convention 0
brownpaperreporter 4 years

The Sydney Cricket Ground is deserted now, as are the bars and streets. No revellry, no songs, as the entire Barmy Army are in jail. An Australian court jumped at the chance to get their own back...

David Chaytor claims second home allowance for Wandsworth Prison 0
Fred 4 years
Bristol police say Heather McCartney is not a suspect . 6
Malcum eggs 4 years
Gordon Ramsey claims Ashes win responsibility as Cook named man of the series 0
simonjmr 4 years
Ted Williams story shocks people to think homeless people are also human beings 0
Dumbnews 4 years
New look Aussie team... 0
Doylem 4 years

Hubris in for Harris, [i]Schadenfreude[/i] to replace Hilfenhaus, Beer in for Bollinger...

Ed Miliband to communicate purely through medium of mime 2
Ludicity 4 years

Labour leader Ed Miliband has revealed that he will take a vow of silence and convey his political message entirely through the performance art of mime, using his body as a political tool. ‘All...

Call up for Skippy as Australia cricket chiefs get desperate for a new captain. 2
Basil_B 4 years
Coalition to end early after more than 6,000 complaints from the public 0
simonjmr 4 years
England boost backroom staff with ‘Nickname Czar’... 1
Doylem 4 years

Having won the Ashes in such dramatic fashion, Team Director, Andy Flower, acknowledges the part played by the backroom staff. “We have bowling coaches, batting coaches, fielding coaches, sports...

Australia to deport 11 terror suspects on January 8th 1
Mrblacker 4 years

The Australian Prime Minister Julia Gillard has confirmed that 11 suspected terrorists are to be deported on Saturday morning after several months of activity. "There've been reports of this group...

Exclusive extract inside: the first three chapters from Julian Assange’s book... 0
Doylem 4 years
Government Relaxed about Dioxin Contaminated eggs exported to UK 2
Dun Dunkin 4 years

British authorities said that the amounts of dioxin - which is linked to the development of cancer in humans - in any egg would be very small, and not enough to be dangerous. "Whether it went into...

"You're not the boss of me!" says CEO of State-Owned Bank 0
Grover 4 years

Stephen Hester, CEO of the state-owned Royal Bank of Scotland, has refused to stop paying huge bonuses to his employees. “You’re not the boss of me!” Hester told Vince Cable, Business...

Government announces that Easter Eggs are safe to eat. 2
Tammy Flugh 4 years

"They contain very little dioxin" a spokesman said, "and in any case they aren't on sale yet. What? They are? Really? Ah"...

Ambridge fans in backlash against "Lamb Swap" storyline 0
Erlang 4 years

A baa faced lie?, ewe never know...

Glasgow pantomime accused of breaking Geneva Convention 0
Iscariot 4 years

It features Jim Davidson...

Afghan bath bomb manufacture traced to UK retailer LUSH 0
flyerblade 4 years

Counter-terrorism officers have traced the Afghan bath bomb manufacture back to high street, hand-made 'smellies' peddler LUSH. The bath bombs, identified by their codenames 'Fizzbanger' and...

England Remembers How to Play Cricket 0
Grover 4 years

England have apparently re-discovered the rules and techniques required to play the sport known as “Cricket”, which they invented in the 16th century. This emerged after England beat Australia in...

Clegg told stance on terror by Cameron - Bend over and grasp your ankles. 2
A Crooked MP 4 years
Michel Roux's Dishwashing. 0
Tammy Flugh 4 years

Thursday, 20:00 on BBC Two, Sequel to Michel Roux's Service. The Michelin star chef takes eight NEETS and tries to convince them that washing dishes in a posh restaurant is better than hanging...

Malcolm Gladwell's latest book, "The miracle of thought" 0
Dumbnews 4 years
US Democrats wish Boehner was pronounced "boner" 0
Grover 4 years
Man who says “I don’t drink” ruins evening for everyone... 1
Doylem 4 years

When Kevin Tasker announced “I don’t drink” to the guys assembled at the bar of the Rose and Crown, at the start of what looked like being a convivial after-work session, early Friday evening,...

Jedi-Sith coalition 'working very well' 1
Zadok the second 4 years

[i]Dark Side 'not actually dark. More dusky'[/i] Top Jedi Mace Windu has defended the record of the Sith-Jedi coalition Empire since it came to power last May. “It was soon clear that Jedi and...

Threat of punctual transport system ‘exaggerated’, say authorities 1
Des Custard 4 years

Ministers were quick this morning to play down fears of a punctual transport system after the official level of threat was raised from ‘substantial’ to ‘severe’, saying the situation was far...

Criminals now forced to moonlight as firemen, reports trade mag Crime Scene 4
ronseal 4 years

Crime Scene, the trade magazine for the legally challenged community, has conducted a survey that shows that criminals are being forced to take second jobs to make ends meet., The hard up hoods are...

Danny Boyle referred to Trading Standards because 127 hours only lasts 94 mins. 1
Ian Searle 4 years

Doesn't do what it says on the tin...

Hit cowboy campfire song laments the decline of spam. 2
petebrown 4 years

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