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God and Satan: "No reunion, this year." 0
Darkbill 2.0 4 years

The Lord God Almighty and Satan, Prince of Darkness, have ruled out getting back together again, after enjoying wildly successful solo careers. God, relaxing in the Italian resort of Lake Como told...

Art expert discovers £22m Manet self portrait had beard filled in with crayon 2
edward hack 4 years


NHS increase staph despite budget cuts 0
andhrimnir 4 years
BBC deny 'sexing up' Budget coverage with new presenter Sophie Dahl 3
Ludicity 4 years

'Emergency Budget with The Delicious Miss Dahl has been very popular,' said BBC Director General, Mark Thompson, 'audiences love the way that Sophie can explain the Public Sector Borrowing...

Friendly Bacteria Announce They Really Don’t Like Probiotic Yogurt 1
Deimos 4 years

In a surprise announcement earlier today, the Friendly Bacteria and announced that they really “don’t go for” probiotic yogurts. In fact the find they say they are decidedly unpleasant. They...

Capello refused entry into UK 0
Scroat 4 years

"For his own safety" say immigration officials. "But really because he's a prat."...

New Gulf drilling to minimize sea-bed impact by floating the oil ashore 0
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
The weather forecast 0
Scroat 4 years

Dry and sunny throughout the UK this morning, but we will see a huge black cloud over England this afternoon. I'm afraid this will be with us for some time, and there is no immediate sign of this...

Almighty to set the record straight over notorious ‘Hand of God’ picture 0
Darkbill 2.0 4 years

The Supreme Being says that he wants to set the record straight once and for all over His infamous appearance in Michelangelo’s picture ‘The Creation of Adam’. The flamboyant, but...

Makeup products 'getting out of hand' says beauty expert 1
QorbeQ 4 years

Top brand L'Oreal is the latest manufacturer to take their products into the realms of 'extreme makeup', pushing the beauty industry to breaking point according to world renowned makeup artist Gucci...

Bankers “Shocked” at having to bail out UK Government 2
Quaz 4 years

The bankers of the city of London are said to be shocked and angered at a budget measure that will force them to pay a levy of some £2 billion pounds. “I cannot see why we should be forced to bail...

McChrystal joins England squad, Terry summoned to White House 2
Scroat 4 years
French blame 'Linesman's Flag of God'. More soon 1
Ostsee 4 years
Higgs Bosun blamed for collision 0
PluckyMunky 4 years
Pink Floyd and Higgs Boson particle in High Court plagiarism row 0
Scroat 4 years
Crucifixion of Jesus ‘may have been a DIY accident’ 3
Genghis Cohen 4 years

Newly discovered evidence suggests that the crucifixion of Jesus Christ, presumed to have been ordered by the Roman prefect Pontius Pilate, may in fact have been a tragic accident caused by Jesus...

Osborne defends his battered red box 0
PluckyMunky 4 years
Higgs boson God particle was humming Kumbaya warn scientists 0
edward hack 4 years
Dogging In the House of Corrections 0
afternoonslow 4 years

An expectant hush fell upon the Chamber as the Master prepared to arouse himself.. Seated on the front bench, Dave and Nick were barely able to contain their excitement. This was to be their first...

Book theif's loot revealed to be Osbourne's copy of 'The Economy, Stupid' 0
euankitson 4 years
Football Match ruins Vuvuzela concert. 0
euankitson 4 years
Lacking advertisers to appease, BBC admits rating war with ITV is 'just for fun' 0
QorbeQ 4 years
V.A.T. Increase angers gift voucher holders. 0
euankitson 4 years

Thousands of people across the U.K. are enraged tonight in the wake of Osbourne's Budget announcement today. Whilst the 'scathing public sector cuts' was a phrase [i]mentioned[/i], the real vitriol...

Capello tipped for job at Preston North End. 1
Ostsee 4 years
Jilted idealistic child "to direct anger toward creative self-improvment" 0
Quincel 4 years

Nothing more to come...

Taliban relaunches as 'heritage Islam' 2
JJStrangelove 4 years

Mullah Omar: Battle for hearts and minds crucial...

Council brings in L'Oreal to restore order in Secondary Schools 0
brownpaperreporter 4 years

A council spokesperson is quoted as saying "the mere fact that thousands of pounds was spent on advertising their Youth Code meant we knew they took this seriosuly. We have some very unruly schools...

Opposition MP's Plan to Wear Ugly Masks at Next Election 0
Jesse Bigg 4 years

In order to win more votes, Opposition MP's have agreed to wear a Quasimodo look-alike mask at the next election, as they feel that voters are becoming tired of smarmy, good-looking government MP's...

Hidden details reveal more creative tax raising in Budget 0
Mrblacker 4 years

The small print of the budget delivered by George Osborne has revealed new and creative ways the Government will raise taxes to pay off the national debt. The details are contained within the...

Fear of Ray Winstone turning nation into hardened gamblers 2
Gary Stanton 4 years

TV hardman Ray Winstone’s series of World Cup Betfair adverts has struck the fear of God into those who like the occasional flutter turning them into hardened gamblers, it has emerged. The fear of...