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"We must hold our nerve," says Clegg. "Like Thelma and Louise," say voters. 0
la maga 4 years
Cameron claims Thatcher 'a pussy' on public sector cuts and fighting miners 2
la maga 4 years

David Cameron today announced that he has always consider Margaret Thatcher 'a bit of an amateur, even something of a pussy' when it came to slashing government budgets and fighting miners. "For one...

Brideshead Revisited fan disappointed with his first day at University of Bolton 1
roybland 4 years
Whitehall Chainsaw Massace lacks sufficient fake blood say critical horror fans 1
la maga 4 years

As their chainsaws move towards the welfare system once more, Cameron and Clegg, head of the cabal of cannibals currently starring in the nationally broadcast franchise 'The Whitehall Chainsaw...

England football squad 'keen to associate selves' with match fixing allegations 0
QorbeQ 4 years

"Errm, yeah, we did it deliberatelyno, really we did"...

Clegg ‘clearly offside’ say party faithful 0
Gerontius 4 years

Former Lib-Dem favourite Nicky Clegg was met with a chorus of boos from a section of the crowd as he took to the lectern for the first time since his loan move across to the Tory bench., In his...

Naomi Campbell decides against the diamonds for memorial service. 1
riesler 4 years

goes as a crow instead,

Katie Perry's hen night bash outdone by future hubby Russells camera man bash. 0
Basil_B 4 years
Prime Ministerial pay officially ratified as SI unit of salary comparison 6
QorbeQ 4 years
Isle of Wight woman catches alligator 0
Son of Barnabas 4 years

A Yarmouth woman surprised her family and friends on Saturday when she came home from the beach with a 13-foot, 1,025-pound alligator. Mary Peagram, 58, was still in a state of shock as she...

Butt 'talking out of his' says Strauss 0
jp1885 4 years
Shameless cost cutting as Southern Rail to axe toilets on new trains 0
Basil_B 4 years

Directors of Southern Railways were blaming the recession today for their latest round of cost cutting after announcing that no toilets will be built into their new fleet of trains. ' We're just...

Tesco to sell Viagra with ad campaign: "Helps every little" 1
Son of Barnabas 4 years
Acne doctor in spot fixing claims 0
simonjmr 4 years
Man who failed to keep up repayments on exorcism to be repossessed 7
wirralmatt 4 years

[More Soon]...

Tesco Viagra not available for self-service 0
roybland 4 years
Dead Victorian gets Make-over 7
parlyvoo 4 years

Conference organiser at Crofton Park in Birmingham is shocked at the angry reaction of crowds when the body of the late Cardinal Newman is displayed with a new hairstyle, teeth implants and a...

Jeweller denies allegations of Watch fixing 0
Iamthestig 4 years
Tesco's cut price Viagra to hit Hard-on the chemists 0
Iamthestig 4 years
Department of the bleedin' obvious: 3
Son of Barnabas 4 years

Obesity epidemic simply caused by eating too much, claims academic....

BBC television cameraman discovered high in the Himalayas 0
roybland 4 years

A BBC television natural history cameraman has been seen high in the Bhutan mountains of the Himalayas. ‘We were astonished to see a BBC cameraman at altitudes of 11,000 feet,’ growled a...

ICC to investigate Pakistan winning toss. 0
riesler 4 years

something about a 'double-header'?...

Sam Allardyce; 'I can manage Unreal.' 1
pinxit 4 years
I'm fed up with being overshadowed by my wife, says Lord Ga Ga 6
StoopyDeGunt 4 years

Lord Ga Ga says living with a highly successful wife has taken its toll on him - but he's prepared to stay and fight to make the marriage work. [MUST FINISH THIS LATER]...

THe News of the World admit to taping John Prescotts 0
arrghgarry 4 years

girth while he was having a bulimic attack ...

Lady Ga Ga “spit-roasted” at footballer party? 0
hero2zero 4 years

It is rumoured that Lady Ga Ga was “Spit-roasted” at a private footballer party, but despite concerted efforts our reporter has been unable to confirm injuries or ascertain if hospital burns unit...

Stephen Hawking to publish A Brief History of the Sudoku 0
roybland 4 years

Renowned physicist and cosmologist Stephen Hawking is about to reveal what he regards as the crowning achievement of his career. 'For centuries humankind has grappled with the mysteries of Sudoku,'...

FOR SALE: Modified Mercedes m-class, colour white, ideal for mobilising popes. 3
Basil_B 4 years

Only just come to market. Only one available...

Sky News to change name to Vatican TV. 0
MADJEZ 4 years

After this weekends blanket news coverage of the Pope's visit Sky has admitted it has sold its flagship news station to be the propoganda tool of the Catholic church. Sky staff are said to be...

Catholicism renounces Pope, converts to Anglicanism following 'dreary' UK visit 0
QorbeQ 4 years