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North Korea wins first 2012 Olympic gold in Women's Flouncing event 0
The Paper Ostrich 26.07.12 10:11am
The Paper Ostrich
Rangers relegated to North Korean third division. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 26.07.12 10:03am
Britain secure first Olympic medal with bronze in Opening Ceremony Competition

Britain made a auspicious start, by winning a medal in the opening event at the 2012 Olympic Games in London., Britain were third to light the torch, using a flaming dove - beating Denmark's flaming...

gaijintendo 26.07.12 10:02am
Trebor launches Sherbert double dib-dab as sweet relief to economic recession 0
Iamthestig 26.07.12 9:40am
Manchester Lad Seeks Asylum In Italy

An 11 year old lad from Manchester successfully evaded border controls yesterday and escaped to Rome. Little Liam Corcoran-Fort, told Italian officials that everyone in Britain was in such bad debt...

26.07.12 9:38am
Scottish city changes name to Glasgay in bid to attract more weddings 0
Iamthestig 26.07.12 9:36am
Dr Who becomes suspicious as death toll rises 0
medici2471 26.07.12 9:21am
First Scotttish gay wedding couple seek heterosexual planner 2
charlies_hat 26.07.12 9:01am
“I Simply Don't Believe It” - Sighs LOCOG's Lord Meldrew

LOCOG bigwig, Lord Victor Meldrew, threw up his arms in disbelief last night, after officials raised the South Korean flag to honour the North Korean football team. “What in the name of bloody...

26.07.12 8:48am
Scottish gay wedding bill welcomed by kilt industry 2
26.07.12 8:18am
Maybe not 2
Nerys Hughes 26.07.12 8:10am
Disgust as Olympic political discourse breaks out into unedifying sport

Seemingly oblivious to issues surrounding tickets, traffic congestion, G4S, strikes and the cost to the taxpayer, Team GB and New Zealand’s women played football in Cardiff’s Millennium Stadium...

Artisan 25.07.12 11:36pm
First Gay Scottish Wedding Cancelled As Both Grooms Are Raging Homophobes

It was meant to be the happiest day in the lives of Barry Boyle and Gordon Darcy. It was the day that they were going to make a lifelong commitment of love to one another and live happily ever after....

Hooch 25.07.12 10:38pm
Queen Attends All Star Production of Revelations to Mark Diamond Jubilee

An all star cast was in attendance at Downing Street yesterday for the opening night of SamCam’s Production of The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. Downing Street Footlights headed the bill in the...

scottishbird 25.07.12 9:35pm
Psycho puts faith in Blair.

The chattering classes need wonder no more, Tony is back. In a surprise move that has stunned commentators, Stuart Pearce announced “Over the past few days I have had my fair share of critics, but...

Kieran 25.07.12 9:10pm
Hard-up dry cleaning owner accused of money laundering

Stop me if you've heard this before....

JohnA 25.07.12 9:00pm
Unemployed lorry driver, 54, launches Olympic selection bid

With a whopping 48 hours until the opening ceremony of London 2012, Dave Collins, a 54 year-old unemployed lorry driver, said he was “Humbled” to announce his intention to seek selection for Team...

antharrison 25.07.12 8:39pm
Health & Safety executive appoints Prince Charles as Heir on the side of caution 0
wallster 25.07.12 8:37pm
Gretna Green over run by English gay elopers 1
custard cream 25.07.12 8:37pm
English gays go to Gretna Green to put rings on fingers

Combining subs by Psychadelic Squirrel and custard cream...

Sinnick 25.07.12 8:33pm
Cast of EastEnders to be responsible for Olympic security

Following the successful foray of the Olympic torch relay into the fictitious London Borough of Walford, Home Secretary Theresa May has announced that responsibility for Olympic security is to be...

The Paper Ostrich 25.07.12 8:25pm
The Paper Ostrich
Athletes Union says Olympic strikes 'inevitable'

More chaos was poured on the 2012 London Olympics today with the announcement of industrial action by the British Runners, Athletes, Sailors, Oarspersons and Fencers Federation., Expected to last...

govanesque 25.07.12 8:23pm
Gay Scottish weddings: putting rings on fingers 1
Psycadelic Squirrel 25.07.12 8:22pm
Boyle Responds to Criticism of Opening Ceremony by Keeping it Real

On June 12th a model of the opening ceremony was unveiled. However, in response to widespread criticism of his plans for the Olympic opening ceremony, Danny Boyle revised the whole script. Criticism...

mahesh 25.07.12 8:21pm
Olympics called off as atheletes strike over bonus for working during Olympics 0
Al OPecia 25.07.12 8:16pm
Al OPecia
Man who wasn't 'being funny or nuffink' continues to deliver on promise 2
ronseal 25.07.12 7:24pm
Man who launched pooper-scoop company says "Business is picking up" 2
seymour totti 25.07.12 7:04pm
Field for sale; slightly soiled 0
Perks 25.07.12 5:55pm
Olympic opening ceremony to feature Prince Philip shooting wildlife

Rumours that Prince Philip is to feature in the spectacular Opening Ceremony of the Olympic Games have been confirmed by Buckingham Palace insiders. When faced with the prospect of having to endure...

Stan 25.07.12 4:43pm
Vertically Challenged Giant
Scottish government to allow two Jocks to marry 0
charlies_hat 25.07.12 4:25pm