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Kim Kardashian's bottom blamed for economic crisis

Kim Kardashian's curvy derrière appears to be the latest scapegoat for the economic crisis, as government officials have revealed that every meeting they have about the economy just turns into an...

Shandy 23.11.11 3:18pm
Deer more recognisable than haggis in Scotland

Report claims that the deer is now the most recognisable Scottish wild animal...

grottymonty 23.11.11 3:08pm
Shock as psychic Russel Grant fails to predict the demise of his own career

A wave of shock has swept the psychic world as esteemed medium Russel Grant failed to predict the slow erosion of his own pitiful career. Psychic Grant has made a living from issuing vague...

Shandy 23.11.11 2:51pm
Victoria Beckham finally smiles after pout surgery


vertical 23.11.11 2:26pm
"What do you mean, he isn't a dwarf?!" asks stunned Merchant 0
medici2471 23.11.11 1:15pm
Mrs Alan Johnson also faces the sack 3
medici2471 23.11.11 12:56pm
Come Dine With Me voiceover to I Have A Dream speech 'may have been a mistake'

Campaigners have admitted that, in retrospect, they should not have invited comedy voicover actor Dave Lamb to supply a series of camp and sarcastic interjections during Dr Martin Luther King's...

Oxbridge 23.11.11 12:50pm
Problem looms over poor cloth making machines

Many British cloth making machines are faulty. Asked if this problem was looming a spokesman said, "That's what I've just said, cloth ears."...

apepper 23.11.11 12:25pm
Pat Sharp explains he actually said he would "dismember and burn JEDWOOD!"

Country rallies behind him...

Ian Searle 23.11.11 12:19pm
Ian Searle
Atheist Pavlovian researcher launches Salivation Army.

Hat-tip to Medici...

John Ffitch-Rucker 23.11.11 11:57am
Teenage rebel walked out after failing to upset parents

Missing student Charlie Bradfield may have left home because his parents approved of everything he did, according to his closest friends. "Charlie did his best to provoke his old man and got really...

Midfield Diamond 23.11.11 11:56am
Electric cars can be charged overnight from solar cells, claims Minister 0
Ostsee 23.11.11 11:40am
Microsoft Bankrupted By Man Trademarking The Phrase ‘Fragment (Consider Revising

The IT industry was left in shock yesterday after the collapse of the software giant Microsoft when unemployed Dave Digby from Felixstowe trademarked the phrase ‘Fragment (consider revising)’....

UnoEye 23.11.11 11:28am
TV Chat Show Host Replaced By Talking Arse

In a drive to cut costs at the BBC, producers have been forced to pull Graham Norton off. Sorry, have been forced to pull Graham Norton off his prime-time Friday night slot., Beeb bosses announced...

Fray Brentos 23.11.11 11:20am
Fray Brentos
Missing Scandanavian airline pilot 'just disappeared into Finnair' 5
Smart Alex 23.11.11 11:19am
Bellringer's ASBO overturned on a peal

dusting out back corners of my gag store, why do camp anologists always practise at 7.30am on a saturday...

vertical 23.11.11 11:18am
Lord Gaga Calls Time on 'Uncontrollable" Wife

The elaborate stage performances and headline-grabbing costumes of Lady Gaga could well be consigned to the annals of history following the discovery of her antics by Lord Gaga, 4th Marquis of...

Fray Brentos 23.11.11 11:10am
Fray Brentos
Use of placebos can produce sugar dependence, claims BMA. 0
Griffin 23.11.11 11:08am
Ricky Gervais not a bigot, claims dwarf

A high profile dwarf has defended Ricky Gervais against accusations of bigotry, before being pushed over and laughed at by Gervais himself. “Ricky likes to play around with traditional notions of...

Sam 23.11.11 10:51am
Spanish fisherman denies he castanet

definately no more soon...

woody 23.11.11 10:47am
Coogan denies Daily Mail reports he lives 'in a pear tree' 3
Perks 23.11.11 10:40am
Tributes flood in for Ian Brunel, Britain's most inventive hedge fund speculator

Tributes have continued to pour in for Ian Brunel, the recently passed hedge fund speculator who has done more to shape our lives than any man in recent history. Famed for his ability to push a loop...

23.11.11 10:39am
Green graffiti cleaner loses position with Isle of Wight Council

Derek Johnson, at one stage dubbed a green pioneer for his work with natural cleaning products, has been made redundant after his lemon juice inspired rapid response graffiti cleaning services proved...

fernandomando 23.11.11 9:05am
Ex-pat Brits returning from Oz 'due to lack of conviction' 0
Runestone Cowboy 23.11.11 7:32am
Runestone Cowboy
Man dies after overdose of moderation 1
Nick McCarr 23.11.11 3:44am
iPhone 4S recall notice issued after Siri app develops attitude problem

Apple have been forced to recall thousands of units of the iPhone 4S after complaints from users that the Siri app had become unhelpful, rude, and in extreme cases, had called in anonymous tips about...

Vertically Challenged Giant 23.11.11 12:05am
Vertically Challenged Giant
Ofcom investigate X factor over illegal promotion of algebra 4
charlies_hat 22.11.11 11:22pm
Smart Alex
Mervyn King Latest: "Reduce inflation to solve mass unemployment. Also gravity," 0
Ablative Fabsolute 22.11.11 9:53pm
Ablative Fabsolute
Bishop [insert name] apologises for child sex abuse in Diocese of [insert area]

more multiple purpose apologies soon (maybe longer sub later)...

dvo4fun 22.11.11 9:49pm
Mobile phone companies to offer simplified pricing for an additional fee 0
Dumbnews 22.11.11 9:08pm