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Ancient manuscript proves King Cunt probably was.

A recently discovered copy of the Anglo Saxon Winchester Chronicle is shedding light on the life of a long forgotten Viking chieftan, King Cunt. The early 10th century warlord was methodically...

wallster 28.06.11 5:19pm
Double-decker buses demand apology for 'vile' comparison with deadly meteorite

London buses expressed outrage today, after being compared with a deadly meteorite. Meteor 2011MD only narrowly missed colliding with the Earth, and was described as 'bus-sized' in many newspapers....

28.06.11 4:24pm
Parents to be OFSTED inspected during teachers' strike.

Michael Gove, the schools’ minister, announced today that OFSTED, the school inspection body, would continue their work unhindered by the disruption that the NUT and ATL teacher’s strike would...

Mr Payne 30.06.11 8:34am
BBC unveils new pre-vandalised Blue Peter garden

The BBC has unveiled a new-look, pre-vandalised Blue Peter garden ahead of the programme’s move to Salford next week. The BBC’s flagship children’s magazine programme is being relocated from...

The Paper Ostrich 28.06.11 9:13pm
Insurance hikes blamed on Max Mosley's whiplash claims 0
greg various 28.06.11 12:58pm
greg various
Play delayed as fault with centre court roof switches on automated sprinkler 0
Basil_B 28.06.11 12:29pm
Local Dispute Over Amount of Cigarettes Smoked Within Hourly Timespan

ATHENS, GREECE - Controversy was sparked in a small, inconspicuous,, run-of-the-mill cafeteria near the Greek Parliament building in, Athens, when a local resident otherwise enjoying his afternoon...

Dick Justice 28.06.11 1:29pm
Pyromaniacs Celebrate Supermarket Petrol Price War

Pyromaniacs all over Britain are celebrating as the big four supermarkets stepped up the petrol price war. “At anything up to £1.35 a litre, the cost of torching something as simple as a garden...

Flatcap 28.06.11 12:11pm
Vertically Challenged Giant
Arrest fears cause Gaddafi to rethink holiday on Isle of Wight

Colonel Muammar Gaddafi, entrenched Libyan leader and fan of cream teas and fossil shops, has cancelled this year's holiday in Ventnor. The International Criminal Court issued an arrest warrant for...

28.06.11 4:18pm
eating green wrapped Quality Street does NOT count as part of your 5-a-day

warn nutritionists...

Leeboy007 28.06.11 11:47am
Dads rush to join glam mum school run

The number of dads walking their children to St Francis Xavier's RC Primary School in Hertford has rocketed since 'glam mum' Georgina 'goer' Lusted (22) joined the daily school run. 'Actually, no,'...

roybland 28.06.11 11:50am
edam cheese really will be made backwards

decades old schoolboy joke to become true, say Dutch cheese board...

Leeboy007 28.06.11 11:31am
Craig Thompson requests transfer from Hearts to Glasgow Girls FC

Heart of Midlothian FC will look to cash in on their recently suspended player by offloading him to the top U15's team in West Scotland. "it's a dream move for me, I'm hoping for a holding midfield...

grottymonty 28.06.11 11:28am
oranges ARE the only fruit, scientists discover

more soon....

Leeboy007 28.06.11 11:24am
drinking hot tea does NOT cool you down

as everybody in the world knows. Except Johnny Ball...

Leeboy007 28.06.11 11:18am
Rare original of Andy Murray being 'British' gag valued at £7k by Southebys

Many more soon...

Skylarking 28.06.11 11:16am
Radioactive urine makes pissing in the dark great fun, say Japanese 0
Ostsee 28.06.11 10:11am
Vatican launches Home Exorcism Kit

Pope Benedict XVI has given his seal of approval for a special self-exorcism kit that members of the general public can use to tackle their own personal demons. The kit, comprising of bell, book...

Ludicity 18.11.11 1:40pm
Dyslexic farmer haunted by dead goat 0
FraserWords 28.06.11 9:06am
Kerry Katona enters race for US Presidency

Kerry Katona has entered the race for the US Presidency., The star told a convention in New Hampshire last night: “Announcing my candidacy here is as much a surprise to me as it is to you - I...

FraserWords 28.06.11 9:05am
Flawed Amstrad smartphone 'drops Apps every week'

Lord Sugar, curmudgeonly entrepreneur and star of The Apprentice, has leapt to the defence of his company's new smartphone. The Amstrad 'Oi!' Phone, available exclusively from an oiBarrow in East...

28.06.11 9:00am
Parent's brave bid to keep her child's school open

Mother of three Angela Lewis (27) thinks she's almost ready to keep her child's school open during Thursday's teachers' strike. Ms Lewis admits that arithmetic wasn't her strongest subject at...

roybland 28.06.11 8:54am
Anyone want to develop this idea ?

Today, David Willetts sets out a White Paper on HE reform. So, maybe some Independent MP should set out a White Paper on Electoral reform, creating better competition, value for voters, parties...

Sinnick 28.06.11 4:59pm
Johnny Depp named as world’s most pirated film star 0
Duncan Biscuit 28.06.11 8:19am
Duncan Biscuit
Witness insists Amanda Knox is guilty of being young, female and very pretty 0
Duncan Biscuit 28.06.11 8:18am
Duncan Biscuit
Police dogs found dead in car ‘probably committed suicide’ say police 3
Duncan Biscuit 28.06.11 5:20pm
Blue Peter to relocate to a studio in Salford it made earlier 0
Duncan Biscuit 28.06.11 8:15am
Duncan Biscuit
Nadal to switch his racket for a crutch to play quarter final tie 0
Basil_B 28.06.11 8:08am
Confusion for satirists after Andy Murray reveals Welsh ancestry 3
jp1885 28.06.11 8:59am
Local man's dreams of greatness replaced with making sure fridge is stocked 0
Dumbnews 28.06.11 5:23am