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Gurn control faces change

Controversy is raging in the gurning world over the kinds of gurns that should be allowed and which should be banned. The rules of gurning, which started out as speed dating for ugly people, were...

Not Amused 12.04.13 4:29pm
Not Amused
North Korean missile threat timing slammed as 'insensitive'

Political leaders around the world have today unified in their condemnation of the current agressive stance by North Korea. The timing is being censured as both tasteless and inconsiderate, when most...

Squudge 12.04.13 4:26pm
sponge finger
Rory McIlroy confident '3% of form' will return once Santander campaign ends

more soon....

custard cream 12.04.13 4:17pm
custard cream
ATOS work assessment clears Mrs Thatcher to return to work 7
custard cream 12.04.13 3:11pm
custard cream
Lord Sugar will 'beat the daylights' out of anyone accusing him of bullying

After a former Apprentice winner lost her court case against for constructive dismissal, a jubilant Lord Sugar said 'I knew the stupid little cow was gonna lose. When she told me about the case I got...

John Wiltshire 12.04.13 3:00pm
John Wiltshire
Ding Dong, we got the wrong song. Munchkin music hate-fest mixes East with West

Red faced Media Munchkins are to hold an inquiry after playing the wrong song at their organised hate festival. As Marxist misanthropes and mockney misogynists put on an exhibition of all the worst...

ronseal 12.04.13 2:11pm
Don't do a Thatcher, Operation Yewtree warns suspects

Officers on the Yewtree investigation are keeping a close watch on those under suspicion lest they use the fuss over the former PM's death to slip unnoticed off the mortal coil themselves. Detective...

sydalg 12.04.13 1:57pm
Real reason behind Kim Jong-un’s bellicose bravado revealed

US and UK intelligence agencies today released humiliating transcripts of intercepted communications showing the real reason behind the North Korean leader’s recent bellicose bravado. Kim Jong-un,...

Reg Herring 12.04.13 1:54pm
Cheeky bone marrow thief "just taking the pith" 0
sydalg 12.04.13 1:49pm
Dog Stuck in Pipe For Four Days Still Manages to Crap On Neighbour's Lawn 2
sredni vashta 12.04.13 1:30pm
Oscar Pistorius selected to lead gun salute at Thatcher funeral 0
custard cream 12.04.13 1:29pm
custard cream
Court rules Stella's not sweet enough with Sugar...a storm in a Tea cup 0
irreverendJ 12.04.13 1:19pm
Thatcher to be buried not cremated - the lady's not for burning 3
ianslat 12.04.13 1:17pm
Funeral latest - spit roast off the menu. More soon. 0
Al OPecia 12.04.13 12:45pm
Al OPecia
Sellafield refuses to dispose of Thatcher's ashes for safety reasons. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 12.04.13 10:50am
Gurn control faces change

Controversy is raging in the gurning world over the kinds of gurns that should be allowed and which should be banned. The rules of gurning, which started out as speed dating for ugly people, were...

Not Amused 12.04.13 10:22am
Not Amused
"Harvest the dead" proclaims stoned Dutchman.

Only in Holland would it be socially acceptable to exhume the dead from their place of rest & harvest them for their metal prosthetic body parts, to be recycled into anything from an aircraft...

Teak Weasel 12.04.13 10:17am
Martin McGuinness to arrange 21 gun salute at Lady Thatcher's funeral 0
Sinnick 12.04.13 9:28am
Thatcher Critics Admit "Of Course We're Protesting Now ...

we wouldn't have dared to do so while she was still alive."...

Titus 12.04.13 8:56am
Thatcher reserves to "last for decades".

Experts predict that Margaret Thatcher's influence over the media will last for at least two more decades. Many feared that the recent demise of the former PM would result in "Peak Thatcher" a...

sredni vashta 12.04.13 8:11am
Ritz Hotel to be demolished 'to prevent it becoming a shrine'

More soon It's a Ritz cracker! Heh heh!...

Oxbridge 12.04.13 8:10am
Immigrant disguised as banana slips through UK border controls 0
Dick Everyman 12.04.13 7:04am
Dick Everyman
Suppliers of Korean Pasties Insist That They're The Dog's Bollocks. 0
sredni vashta 12.04.13 2:23am
sredni vashta
Nissan recalls thousands of cars after discovery of traces of horsepower 2
exigo 12.04.13 12:37am
sredni vashta
Chris Huhne Announces "On Principle" He Will Not Be Attending Thatcher Funeral 1
Titus 11.04.13 10:32pm
Dick Everyman
China Embarassed As Its Child Throws Tantrum In Supermarket 0
Titus 11.04.13 10:27pm
Heaven's latest arrival puts St Peter on 3 day week 6
Dick Everyman 11.04.13 10:23pm
Tickets for Thatcher Funeral Sell Out Immediately

Fans decide to buy tickets for Rolling Stones Hyde Park concert as a quieter, more relaxing alternative instead...

Titus 11.04.13 10:01pm
Nation breathes a collective sigh of relief. Elton, Cliff & Macca 'unavailable'

More soon [thankfully not from these three]...

dvo4fun 11.04.13 9:57pm
Nelson Mandela imprisoned as Thatcher tribute

More to follow...

apepper 11.04.13 9:43pm