The NewsBiscuit Writers' Room
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Everything on these pages has been submitted by readers of the site and appears here unedited. Potential front page stories as well as one-liners for the ticker bar are welcome, so if you would like to write for NewsBiscuit please post your article on this submission board and then attempt to give yourself maximum votes over and over again. The most prolific and successful contributors will be considered for the coveted title of 'Writer of the Month'.
Check the following links for info: Guidelines for writers, Writer of the Month, Help with posting.
| Topic — Add New » | Comments | Votes | Author | Last Comment |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Toilet paper voice-over man “to try his hand at poetry” The man whose soft Liverpool voice has long become synonymous with wiping your bottom, or your Labrador puppy’s bottom, has decided on an unlikey new venture. He’s started to write poems. ... |
1 |  |
nickb | 01.11.12 2:38pm pinxit |
| Common Agricultural Policy "should be posher" say Tories | 0 | |
nickb | 01.11.12 1:44pm nickb |
| Lucasfilm halves in value after Disney take it out of the box ... | 0 | |
Kramaring | 01.11.12 1:38pm Kramaring |
| "Walking with humans" is no. 1 on dolphin "things to do before you die" list An extensive worldwide survey conducted by YOLO (Dolphin and Porpoise) plc. has found that walking with humans is now no 1 on dolphin bucket lists, beating the previous winner, "dick about aimlessly... |
25 | |
jamsieoconnor | 01.11.12 1:28pm Vertically Challenged Giant |
| Gastropubs on the verge of wiping out Hotpot from Pub menus The once staple pub menu favourite the hotpot is on the verge of extinction after Gastropubs, Family friendly eateries and carvaries have all but replaced the traditonal country pub or soap opera pub... |
0 | |
simonjmr | 01.11.12 12:30pm simonjmr |
| Curiosity Mars rover finds soil similar to Skegness's and Milton Keynes | 0 | |
simonjmr | 01.11.12 12:08pm simonjmr |
| Disney quick in attempting to quash UK Jedi religous order | 0 | |
simonjmr | 01.11.12 11:44am simonjmr |
| Rolf Harris Shagged my Dog.. More on that later... |
0 | |
victimms | 01.11.12 10:47am victimms |
| Met well by moonlighting | 0 | |
Lucy4 | 01.11.12 10:40am Lucy4 |
| Sandy to be progressively downgraded to "a mild huff" Throughout the week Hurricane Sandy has been down graded from Hurricane to storm via Cyclone and tropical storm. Metrologists are predicting that by the weekend Sandy will have been further... |
0 | |
simonjmr | 01.11.12 9:43am simonjmr |
| Romney woos black voters with unpaid servant plan At a press conference today, Mitt Romney made an audacious play for the black vote by outlining a scheme where each black family would be provided with an unpaid servant who would assist with cooking... |
1 | |
Yikes | 01.11.12 9:13am Yikes |
| "Some Internet news stories fabricated" - claims found-alive Elvis Recently returned to the living, the legendary singer Elvis Presley has announced that after spending the past 10 years looking at the Internet, some of the stories found there are not entirely... |
2 | |
apepper | 01.11.12 7:53am arthurminnit |
| Radio Times gets good reception on the Isle of Wight Advances in radio wave reception technology on the Isle of Wight have opened up a whole new world to its residents. ‘We’ve had plug-in wirelesses for some years,’ said local man Paul Leblanc... |
0 | |
malgor | 01.11.12 1:04am malgor |
| Evil empire buys evil empire in bid to finally destroy childhood Lucasfilm, the evil empire founded by film-maker George Lucas, has announced a buy-out by fellow evil empire Disney. The deal was signed in nerd’s blood by Lucas and Disney’s current Emperor,... |
7 | |
Darkbill 2.0 | 01.11.12 12:59am Boutros |
| Spelling mistake on Chelsea Clattenberg complaint forces apology from Mr Kipling | 0 | |
Sheepback | 31.10.12 11:54pm Sheepback |
| I'm sick of this Savile Row. I will get my suits elsewhere. | 0 | |
george.scofield | 31.10.12 11:48pm george.scofield |
| 1/4 of spaniards are out of work but it is the afternoon so that's expected | 0 | |
george.scofield | 31.10.12 11:46pm george.scofield |
| Murdoch unveils statue of Sir Savile outside BBC Television Centre Top media bastard Rupert Murdoch has unveiled a statue to the late Sir James Savile, on an undersize paedium overlooking the BBC’s headquarters. Naked, heavily tarnished and sitting astride a cowed... |
4 | |
Nunnion Splendacular | 31.10.12 11:11pm Yikes |
| Punjabi Maiden covers band records 'Sikhs Sikhs Sikhs, The Number of the Beast' | 3 | |
Idiot | 31.10.12 10:20pm Yikes |
| Nuclear deterrent annoucement - Minister accused of 'jumping the sub' | 0 | |
custard cream | 31.10.12 9:57pm custard cream |
| Kauto Star retires after accusations of racism towards black horses. More soon. | 0 | |
dominic_mcg | 31.10.12 8:42pm dominic_mcg |
| Monkeys announce rival Premier League Faithfully imitating the old saying, 'Monkey see, monkey do', thousands of British monkeys in captivity have joined forces to form their very own Football Premier League. London Zoo, with easily the... |
4 | |
31.10.12 5:28pm |
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| Tyson sex change operation ‘a complete success’ say surgeons Former world heavyweight champion of the world Mike Tyson is said to be ‘feeling fine’ after undergoing Sex Reassignment Surgery at a clinic near Beverley Hills., Once known as The Baddest Man... |
0 | |
Uncle Bertie | 31.10.12 5:07pm Uncle Bertie |
| University athlete disqualified for being 'too good' | 0 | |
Dumbnews | 31.10.12 4:55pm Dumbnews |
| Eddie goes really bad http://assets4.pinimg.com/upload/87116574013464532_6eyQzb80.jpg... |
5 | |
Squudge | 31.10.12 4:51pm Squudge |
| ‘No new shoes or handbags, bitch, until I see you iron,’ Maidenhead man insists. [url=http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=50886]Neat-O[/url] (I hasten to add)... |
0 | |
malgor | 31.10.12 4:06pm malgor |
| RyanAir centre seat voted the best thing since the iron maiden. | 0 | |
weematt | 31.10.12 3:47pm weematt |
| Initial voyage of new atomic submarine was "more positive than negative" | 3 | |
charlies_hat | 31.10.12 3:40pm Squudge |
| Vacant ‘Freedom of Scarborough’ honour listed on eBay. Bid stands at 99p... | 1 | |
Tripod | 31.10.12 2:43pm Squudge |
| "I made Ronin" album big hit for Elvis / Brit metal band Aaron Maiden | 0 | |
simonjmr | 31.10.12 2:14pm simonjmr |
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