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'Heart and Soul' voted best kitchen and bath cleaner 0
Dumbnews 29.10.11 12:47pm
Murder conviction overturned on appeal.

John Peters, 43, of Newark, Notts. today had his conviction for murdering his wife overturned after evidence emerged of years of verbal provocation. It emerged that his late wife, Marie, was...

John Ffitch-Rucker 29.10.11 10:36am
John Ffitch-Rucker
Arms, fish and trombone cache find attributed to Surreal IRA. 12
spoole2112 29.10.11 9:26am
New report claims 90% of 2-man tents are made by Indonesian children

Occupy London in Moral Quandry. More soon...

grumblechops 29.10.11 9:23am
Job Seekers benefits may be cut - Including paid holiday

Job Seekers up and down the UK have reacted with anger at the governments proposal to cut the benefits of those who fail to pay their fines. Among the benefits to be cut are paid holiday, pension...

Perks 29.10.11 8:34am
mystery revealed why last calls from Kelly's phone came from NOW Newsdesk

At the time MI5 was too embarrassed to reveal their inability to track down the correct location of Kelly after being told of his misfortune in the oxfordshire woods whilst their triangulation...

4ty2 29.10.11 8:21am
Syria relegated from Arab league to Asia minor

more later...

virtuallywill 29.10.11 8:17am
Succession changes "An end to feudal Head of State arrangements. Oh, hang on..." 0
dvo4fun 29.10.11 8:14am
Indian Grand Prix tickets cost months pay for locals. Cheaper than Silverstone !

Ooh little bit of F1 politics, my names Ben Elton. Goodnight...

MADJEZ 29.10.11 7:58am
Bored teen complains "there's nothing on the internet" 2
Nick McCarr 29.10.11 7:51am
X Factor Rhythmix to change name to SCOPE, MENCAP or OXFAM

The TV show backs down in a battle with a children's charity over Rhythmix band name, and are currently considering less contentious names. More soon...

simonjmr 29.10.11 5:41am
Al OPecia
No change at all in top directors' pay (after tax). 0
deskpilot3 28.10.11 10:40pm
Charles now set to become first catholic queen. No more soon.

Charles now set to become first catholic queen. No more soon...

Maverick 28.10.11 10:35pm
Saif al-Islam to appear on Jeremy Kyle Show, offered counselling.

Not the gameshow, obviously...

Al OPecia 28.10.11 10:34pm
Al OPecia
Italy replaces Berlusconi with Joe "La Dolce" vita. More soon. 0
Al OPecia 28.10.11 10:25pm
Al OPecia
Sophie Wessex converts to Islam.

"I thought, what the hell? My kids are going to be shop clerks anyway."...

rikkor 28.10.11 10:18pm
Belief in Sarah Palin early sign of onset of Alzheimer's. More, er, um...... 0
Al OPecia 28.10.11 9:47pm
Al OPecia
Royal line of males have no hair...

Except for Harry but well . you know....

brd888 28.10.11 8:33pm
Giggling Medieval Punishment "Laughing Stock"

A hopeful inventor who presented a giggling version of a 500 year old punishment system was branded a laughing stock by investment Dragons. "Oot's complotloy croozy", explained a furious Duncan...

apepper 28.10.11 7:22pm
Canon fired

St Paul's Canon,Dr Giles Fraser, has left his job over the Occupy London protesters...

apepper 28.10.11 7:11pm
Guilty Vincent feels he's been stabbed in Tabak 0
Perks 28.10.11 6:43pm
Cameron Admits He's A Fake Tan Phoney.......

..Trying hard to hide his impetigo...

Jesse Bigg 28.10.11 5:52pm
Jesse Bigg
Billie Piper's pregnancy written into play: The Lena Zavaroni story. More soon. 1
dominic_mcg 28.10.11 5:37pm
Grayson Perry delighted at new succession rules "All bases covered". More soon. 1
Al OPecia 28.10.11 5:36pm
Number of paces royal wives walk behind their husbands slashed from ten to eight 1
allmyownstunts 28.10.11 5:34pm
Al OPecia
Louis Walsh takes charge of new X-Factor contestant category "Benefit Cheats". 0
Al OPecia 28.10.11 5:22pm
Al OPecia
Sarkozy 'trampled' at European summit

French President Nicolas Sarkozy was airlifted to hospital yesterday after being found sticking to the shoe of Prime Minister David Cameron. “One minute he was there when we had the photo shoot,...

Scroat 28.10.11 4:30pm
Royal Succession chaos caused by Prince Harry/Abu Hamza same sex union

The revised Royal succession rules have been thrown into chaos by Prince Harry's controversial decision to enter a same sex union with Islamic militant Abu Hamza. Prince Harry is currently third in...

apepper 28.10.11 4:23pm
Cornish pensioner walks out of bingo in ‘lateral protest’ against Stratford play

A Truro pensioner stormed out of a bingo club in protest against the explicit scenes of sex and violence in the controversial Marat/Sade play. ‘Why go to the bother of travelling all the way to...

Clarky 28.10.11 4:09pm
New film reveals all Stephen Fry's works written by Shakespeare.

Well, the good bits at least...

John Ffitch-Rucker 28.10.11 3:25pm
John Ffitch-Rucker