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Drugs watchdog warns casual summertime users to ‘be wary of cut grass.’ 0
SingingHinny 4 years
Finalist at the World Self-Barbeque Contest dies 2
brownpaperreporter 4 years

The organiser said all the rules had been followed but the competitor had insisted on toughing it out on a slow rotisserie to a "well done" consistency A delve into the history of the competeition...

Pope Introduces "Cool Ranch" Flavoured Host 1
pencilbox 4 years

headline only...

Editor returns from holiday to find website trashed by gatecrashers 23
Scroat 4 years

Shock horror...

Pakistan hosepipe ban to end soon 2
virtuallywill 4 years

more later...

Moon "too dry for life, but perfect for Gin and Tonic". 5
FormerlyAlOPecia 4 years
Smarmy Dave Comes Up with Plan For a Race of Dwarves to Sweep Chimneys 0
Jesse Bigg 4 years

PM Smarmy has come up with a new plan for a race of dwarves to sweep chimneys. This entails the abolition of free milk in infant schools in mainly poor areas of the country. The Tory plan being to...

Internet becomes hive mind, starts plotting terrorist attack against Illuminati 3
la maga 4 years
Existential GPS Tells You You're Going Nowhere 2
pencilbox 4 years
Daniel Laurusso was just a punch bag ..Karate Kid the truth 9
BlackAndroid 4 years

Whilst the remake of karate kid airs around the globe a secret lay hidden only known within the hidden circle of the production team of The original karate kid. Director ‘John G. Avildsen’ takes...

What Women Want 2: short arsed hairy cross dressing wife beater, with Mel Gibson 4
StoopyDeGunt 4 years

The eagerly anticipated sequel to Mel Gibson's box office smash, What Women Want, due for release to coincide with The Xmas Heavy Drinking and Domestic Violence season, is an absolute belter,...

Crowd Mistakes Man Falling Down Stairs For Parkour Routine 2
pencilbox 4 years
Coulrophobia just a bunch of idiots clowning around 0
BlackAndroid 4 years
Tories seek to boost struggling satire industry by cutting free milk to children 6
rickwestwell 4 years

More soon. Thanks to JeniB for drawing my eye to it...

Facebook crashes after outbreak of Foot and Mouth confirmed on Farmville 5
pinxit 4 years
NHS Postcode Lottery : Last Night's Draw 3
pinxit 4 years

I, P, 3, 5, 2, S. Bonus Ball P. (Guinevere)., There are 5 lucky winners, each getting a knee/hip replacement, sinus wash, dentures and a 3-month course of chemo...

Pop world comes to a standstil as lady Gaga gets her tits 0
arrghgarry 4 years

and puts them behind clothing one insider was beside himself,we were always used to seeing the boys out there ,we even had names for them, pinkie and perkie.Whats next we ask will she make some kind...

Economic pressures force Club Tropicana to finally end free drinks policy 14
dicky37 4 years

[But don't worry, you can sun tan]...

Airport recruit Al-Qaeda suicide bomber on gap year 3
BlackAndroid 4 years

A one time ‘Al-Qaeda’ terrorist made history this week by becoming the first suicide bomber to enter an airport and not try and blow it up after defecting from the ‘Al- Qaeda’ network and...

Al-Qa'ida deny that Pakistan floods were caused by Suicide Plumber.. 8
Sharpehunter 4 years

No more soon...

'Bonuses very unlikely' say Bank chiefs, after banking profits. 0
PluckyMunky 4 years

'We will offer them, of course, but expect most of our people to turn them down.'...

Gregg's pies now 'by Royal Appointment to HM The Queen' 2
PluckyMunky 4 years

Nicholas Whitchell, BBC royal correspondent (of whom Prince Charles once said, 'I loathe that man') said: 'I was indeed fortunate enough to ascertain from her Majesty her favourite bakery product. I...

Forcing Sir Alex Ferguson to talk to the BBC has backfired. 1
Gourd Almighty 4 years

In his first face to face verbal contact with BBC sports reporters since a controversial documentary in 2004, Sir Alex said, “Acshuwey, keepin’ tae whuts strictwy affa re park, naebody kens mare...

Afghan aid workers ' A sacrifice to Huitzilopochtli' claims Cameron 0
la maga 4 years

In a surprise move during a press conference about the deaths of the foreign medics in Afghanistan today, David Cameron donned an ancient Aztec mask and, speaking in a husky voice with a strange...

Elvis impersonator dies on his arse. 1
BlackAndroid 4 years
Christ Officially Changes Name To... 15
pencilbox 4 years

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Rise in cases of scurvy as Saudi Arabia bans strawberries and raspberries too. 0
dominic_mcg 4 years
Nation now confusing Big Brother and Afghan War, say weary pollsters 0
la maga 4 years

After 10 years of Big Brother and 9 years of war in Afghanistan, a confused nation has this week attempted to vote the Taliban out of Afghanistan for good. In what was supposed to be a simple opinion...

The Doctors at the C.S.I branch in Northumbria confirm the 2nd post mortem 0
arrghgarry 4 years

results are in ,everyone got well and truly pissed ,thanks a lot,We are sure that Moaty would have loved to have been there ...

Paul Gascoigne to star in a film about Raoul Moat`s life "Get Moaty" 5
arrghgarry 4 years

Gazza aid "if they tell us what to say like I`ll be reet ,like. av got a saying as well like ,"why aye yippe kay ay mother fucker,wot about that then" good eh ?...