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Daily Star explodes after X-Factor cocaine prostitute alleges sex with Beckham 7
jp1885 4 years
Peter Tatchell handcuffs himself to pink cat in a bid to 'Out' him. 0
MADJEZ 4 years
Bruni confirms that fellatio is just a simple slip of the tongue 0
4ty2 4 years

a well practiced political manoevre by french politicians called le petit mort usually used against their oponents but occasional with their lovers...

Miliband tries to connect with working class by becoming George Formby 0
Basil_B 4 years

As we approached Labour Central Office we could here a strained version of George Formbys "With my Little Ukulele in my Hand" being played particularly badly but to new Labour Party Leader Ed...

ACME electric scooter fails to defy gravity 0
bonjonelson 4 years

The unfortunate death of the owner of the ACME business was blamed today on his ACME electric scooter, which refused to carry on in a straight line across a river after leaving the top of the cliff...

"It's Not About Me" Dave Miliband tells BBC, ITV, CH4, FIVE ,SKY, CBS, NBC 1
IABP 4 years

Fox, Radio 4, Al Jazeera, RTE, YouTube, Twitter, Facebook, MSN...

Company launch new electric scooter The Segwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay 8
MADJEZ 4 years
Jamie Oliver undergoes radical surgery to cure lisp 0
stonio 4 years

Jamie, 35 will be the first to try out the first of it's kind method for fixing the lisp. The bizarre op will mean Jamie will have to go under the knife and lose 3 inches of his tongue., Jamie...

British bankers queing to meet French Euro MP who mistook fellatio for inflation 3
simonjmr 4 years
Tiger Woods focus of Newport man's vendetta 1
simonjmr 4 years

This weeks biannual staging of the Ryder cup at Celtic Manor resort Newport has taken a violent and macabre twist. Police have uncovered a hate plot against the world's number one golfer and sex...

Shot lawyer could start trend fear 1
roybland 4 years
Apathy blamed for nation's inability to 0
bonjonelson 4 years
Early Learning Centre launches "Baby's first Swear word range" 6
brownpaperreporter 4 years

In an attenpt to match the product range to a changing culture, ELC have revamped it's sensory and learning toys. Spelling blocks are no longer available in packs of 26 alphabet letters but come as...

David Cameron discovers long lost brother called Ed - and tells him to get lost 0
Crow 4 years
French MEP's mistake was 'just a slippery tongue' 0
MrChigleysAunt 4 years
Ed Miliband urges support for brother David 0
Mafaking Carwongo 4 years

Famous for having to shave well before their teens, a little known fact about the Millibands is that they failed the auditions for The Chuckle Brothers, Bros, Phil & Grant Mitchell, The Everly...

Scientists discover gene for correct pronunciation of 'migraine' 1
roybland 4 years
Urine exports up by 35% 1
ChrisHarrison 4 years

In a welcome boost for the British economy, it has been announced that 35% more urine has been exported overseas compared to this time twelve months ago. The surprise success of the previously...

Ed Milliband wins role of Sam the eagle in live action Muppet Movie remake 1
simonjmr 4 years

Labour Party to use Sam the Eagle as Ed Milliband's deputy. More soon...

Conservatives apologise for Phil Collins return to top of album charts 0
simonjmr 4 years

The Coalition government has today apolgised for Phil Collinsg return to the UK and subsequent return to the album charts. Collins famously said in 1997 that he would quit the UK if Labour was...

Scientists identify gene responsible for Labour Party's migraines. 0
the coarse whisperer 4 years
Chavez party reeling after winning only 97% of the vote. 0
the coarse whisperer 4 years
Ronan Keating Admits Murdering Father and Son 0
ChrisHarrison 4 years
Labour leadership announcement 'would have benefitted from long dramatic pause' 2
JayGee 4 years

The announcement of Ed Miliband's success in the Labour leadership contest would have been far better received had it been preceded by an X-Factor like pause, claimed Simon Cowell this morning. 'I...

Doctors Announce World's Oddest Looking Siamese Twins Have Now Been Separated. 2
IABP 4 years The operation which took a painstaking number of months has now been completed with both of them responding well to...

Everyone struggles to keep straight face after tragic segway accident 0
jm 4 years
Segway boss regrets boasting about his Evel Knieval impression. 0
the coarse whisperer 4 years
Netanyahu urges talks as Palestinian bollock-kicking starts 2
rickwestwell 4 years

Israel's PM Benjamin Netanyahu has urged the Palestinians to continue peace talks despite an end to Israel's ban on West Bank settlement-building, and Israel's recent decision to kick Palestine in...

Pigeon-racing competitors banned from Tweeting 0
pinxit 4 years
Millionaire Jimi Heselden demonstrates death is segue to another life 0
Erlang 4 years