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Eric Pickles in a new Autobiography looks back and puts his luck and fortune 0
Malcum eggs 4 years

down to when he was just a young Yorkshire pup over 40 years ago and finding the stolen World Cup behind a privet hedge,since then it has been one long life of wining and dining ,especially dining...

After a Million is spent on one fat bastard ,NHS to sue lovers that dump their 0
Malcum eggs 4 years

fat loser partners and hence send them into a spiral of gorging , self pity and unemployable status...

Tumble Dryer arrested in hunt for architect's missing sock. 1
Mrblacker 4 years
Dead sea Chronicles reveal The last words of Jesus were condemning the Joiners. 0
Malcum eggs 4 years
Architect Murder: Sock-Monster now Prime Suspect 1
Mr.3374 4 years
Police search for killer who puts an odd sock on his victims. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 4 years
Bristol police 'inundated' after appeal for odd sock 1
Bravenewmalden 4 years

Even after receiving more than 3 million odd socks from the Bristol area alone, police say it is 'unlikely' they will find one that matches the one in their possession. Or any that match at all...

Kevin Spacey apologises for being an arse 0
bonjonelson 4 years

[more soon]...

In true coalition style Clegg and Osbourne share Most Hated Man Award. More soon 0
dominic_mcg 4 years
Attempt to scale face of Keith Richards abandoned ........ 10
Stan 4 years

Attempt to scale face of Keith Richards abandoned after loss of climber in crevasse It was announced last night that the British expedition to climb the face of Keith Richards, the veteran Rolling...

Pig to be part of Dick King-Smith's funeral buffet... 0
Doylem 4 years
George Osborne 'is kind to animals' 2
Fred 4 years

Friends and family have rallied to the defence of George Osborne after he was described in the media as “the most hated man in Britain”., The Chancellor, far from being a monster who doesn’t...

Boy issues plea for information in case of lost childhood innocence 1
dogwheels 4 years

A 13-year-old boy has issued a desperate plea for witnesses after police launched a manhunt in search of his lost childhood innocence. The boy, Timothy Spizzwick, said he hadn't seen his missing...

Royal Wedding on hold until Kate's lawyers finish negotiating pre-nup. More soon 0
dominic_mcg 4 years
Meeting of SPL clubs agrees Scottish football should be 'less shit' 0
dogwheels 4 years
Nation's pavements take a pounding as millions of fatties start one-day diet 0
dogwheels 4 years

More soonnext year...

News of the World journalist suspended for doing what he was told 0
dogwheels 4 years
The Archbishop of Canterbury is to marry Prince William and Kate Middleton 0
flyerblade 4 years

Straight quote from the BBC news website for the obvious joke "The Archbishop of Canterbury is to marry Prince William and Kate Middleton at their forthcoming wedding, St James Palace discloses."...

Sort rubbish, says council: bottles, cans, organic, paper, garden waste, cats... 0
Doylem 4 years
Shops announce run on Creme Eggs. More soon. 0
FormerlyAlOPecia 4 years
RSPCA to get involved in unemptied bins dispute. More soon. 0
FormerlyAlOPecia 4 years
Vice-captain Cook rediscovers Australia... 0
Doylem 4 years
William & Kate announce soap-style wedding plans 0
ianslat 4 years

Prince William and Kate Middleton today revealed plans to hold a soap-opera style wedding in April. ‘We feel that the country needs a lift at the moment’ explained the Prince, ‘and everybody...

‘I didn’t get where I am today,’ teleportation machine inventor admits. 3
malgor 4 years
HMV to rebrand CDs as novelty beer mats... 3
Doylem 4 years
"Don't pray for rain to avoid test match defeat" urge Queenslanders. 0
riesler 4 years
Breast implants lead to higher risk of pregnancy say researchers 4
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
Nokia taps the Silver Surfer age group with the launch of the Nandroid phone 6
brownpaperreporter 4 years

Featuring an indestructible, dribble resistant casing with permanently attached strap, the buttons are extra large and run from A-Z rather than a QWERTY keyboard. The quietest setting is 85 decibels...

infidel muslim clerics demand stronger blast-for-me legislation in Pakistan 0
4ty2 4 years

to show that the propagation of the holy word by the blast is more powerful than the failed propagation of the bible by the sword., The Pakistani government is trying to combat religious tensions by...

Bristol Police: “We’re disappointed. The garlic bread didn’t turn up either”... 0
Doylem 4 years