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Scorsese's Ringo Starr epic to be a DVD extra on George Harrison documentary 0
Iamthestig 03.10.11 12:35pm
Iamthestig
Chancellor Osborne "We're the party of small businesses" is to start with Nissan 0
dvo4fun 03.10.11 12:22pm
dvo4fun
No early tax cuts, claims George Osborne; We don't get up till after lunch. 0
Screenie 03.10.11 12:17pm
Screenie
Government unveils plans for a dribbling, incontinent workforce

The government have unveiled their plans for a dribbling, incontinent workforce by removing the statutory retirement age and raising the state pension age to 95 The upper classes have welcomed the...

0
suepersonic 03.10.11 11:39am
suepersonic
Wally with the Brolly ends Reign 1
Midfield Diamond 03.10.11 10:43am
Midfield Diamond
Council houses to be frozen once more this year

Following an upturn in hypothermia related deaths in late 2010, Chancellor Gideon Osborne has announced plans to freeze council houses for a second year in succession, a move that he hopes will...

3
spoole2112 03.10.11 10:41am
Screenie
Workers on minimum wage welcome new-style £50 note

Workers who are paid the minimum wage have warmly welcomed the newly designed £50 note to be introduced next month. 'It'll make life so much easier for me,' said care worker Jane Bradbury....

0
roybland 03.10.11 9:54am
roybland
New Kate Moss cosmetic line fees not to be sniffed at say City experts. 0
dvo4fun 03.10.11 9:25am
dvo4fun
Redundant wedding-cake factory workers ‘break down in tiers’. 0
John Ffitch-Rucker 03.10.11 9:02am
John Ffitch-Rucker
Restaurant called couple at home to ask 'is everything still all right?'

As John and Nicola Williams prepared for bed, they were astonished to get a phone call from the restaurant where they'd dined earlier that evening. 'I was just about to get into bed, when the phone...

11
roybland 03.10.11 8:35am
TokyoTomato
Marr's ears a curse and a blessing.

Whilst on his way along London's Thames embankment to present his Sunday morning news programme at the BBC studios Andrew Marr was sucked out through the open roof of his car by a freak gust of wind...

1
Rogertrout 03.10.11 8:07am
John Ffitch-Rucker
X - Factor judge breaks down in tears

As the X Factor judging rolled on in the various 'houses' across the world, Gary Barlow of 'Take That' fame burst into tears when one of his winning contestants refused the offer of a place in the...

1
Rogertrout 03.10.11 6:49am
dvo4fun
Greece Fail to Hit Debt Repay Targets Despite "Definitely Posting Cheque"

Greece has apologised for missing debt repayment targets which were agreed as part of the loan arrangements with the European Central Bank and as set in its austerity measures. Greece told the EU...

0
thisisall1word 03.10.11 12:11am
thisisall1word
Ageing ‘Who’ fan witnessed all their early gigs.

Saw Moon., Hat tip to nickb...

2
John Ffitch-Rucker 02.10.11 10:31pm
nickb
Every TV show in the Autumn schedules “to feature Stephen Fry”

The BBC, ITV and Sky joined forces last night to announce that every single programme to be shown on British television over the next six months will, on pain of death, feature Stephen Fry in some...

4
Mathna 02.10.11 9:28pm
borednow
Gove to promote English as a modern foreign language in English schools

Michael Gove has shown his enthusiasm for the teaching of languages by promoting the teaching of english as a modern foreign language in selected primary schools., 'Some schools have pupils who...

0
Rogertrout 02.10.11 9:24pm
Rogertrout
New cuts: Navy ordered to use Cat 'o' Seven Tails and reduce to Five by 2013.

More cuts are expected...

2
Iscariot 02.10.11 9:13pm
John Ffitch-Rucker
X -Factor loser donates whole body to science

August May, one of the losing finalists in the X-Factor has offered her body to science. This is more surprising that it seems in that she wants this to take effect immediately. Miss May, who...

0
Rogertrout 02.10.11 9:06pm
Rogertrout
UK's first Cannibal Restaurant closes after losing Head Chef

[More soon]...

2
dicky37 02.10.11 8:54pm
dicky37
Brand Refused Canada entry: Documents incorrectly stated profession "comedian". 3
Al OPecia 02.10.11 8:49pm
Golgo13
Grandpa recounts vivid tails from his younger days as a jerk 0
Dumbnews 02.10.11 7:28pm
Dumbnews
Olympic Stadium confirms it will cater for mixed-races. Jessica Ennis pleased. 0
kga6 02.10.11 7:20pm
kga6
THE FUHRER DECLAIMS

Before I became the Fuhrer ,, To lead the German masses,, I had to wear a monocle,, Because I couldn't afford real glasses...

1
yuri_nahl 02.10.11 7:16pm
borednow
THE PARABLE OF THE SHORT-LEGGED DONKEY

The Lord also said, "For those who hath forsaken Me, (because of the boil on my nose,) I curse thee to having a boil on thy anus, and the boil will have an abundance of redness, large diameter and...

11
yuri_nahl 02.10.11 7:15pm
borednow
THE BISHOP DESCENDS INTO HELL.

While I explained the apparent similarity of Father Damien Karras's name and Father Damien Karras's name, Father Damien Karras is actually the father of Father Damien Karrras. The Father having...

10
yuri_nahl 02.10.11 7:09pm
borednow
No bailout of Greece, Met Office warns

 ,  ,  ,  ,  , As Britons bask in October temperatures higher than in Athens, the  Met Office has warned that the UK will not bailout Greece as that country's sunshine reserves fall.,  ,...

0
roybland 02.10.11 2:41pm
roybland
Cricketer with gun goes for a duck

more soon (Edit from, Cricketer with gun out for a duck) Vote now...

4
kga6 02.10.11 2:41pm
kga6
Summer to stay as Met Police/Office team up to predict daylight robberies 0
kga6 02.10.11 2:09pm
kga6
Nicorette to offer menthol patches 0
nickb 02.10.11 12:17pm
nickb
Current generation claim "Sudoku puzzles were harder back in our day"

Secretary of State for Education, Michael Gove, has come under fire today amidst further claims that the sudoku puzzle has been "dumbed down". The claims look certain to force a Government U-turn on...

0
kga6 02.10.11 9:24am
kga6