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Bank of England finds £160bn down the back of the sofa. More soon. 0
deskpilot3 15.06.12 10:08pm
Girl,9,demonstrates blogosphere is composed of complete morons

A nine-year-old girl has demonstrated that the blogosphere is composed of complete morons by getting 2.75 million people to look at her photographs of school dinners. 'When I first started my...

roybland 15.06.12 8:25pm
Jonathan Pearce announces trial of new tone for Ukraine commentary

Ahead of Tuesday's Euro 2012 clash between England and Ukraine, BBC Sport's Jonathan Pearce has bowed to pressure from viewers and agreed to try out a new vocal tone for his commentary during the...

Haywood Manley 15.06.12 8:05pm
Haywood Manley
Tiger Woods wins Ronseal Sponsorship....

Good with Wood!...

Jammydodgers 15.06.12 7:55pm
Irish dermatologist changes his name to Dermot 1
nickb 15.06.12 5:51pm
Haywood Manley
Front porch leak blamed on Jehovah's wetness. 0
nickb 15.06.12 5:27pm
Ukranian police hunt Stock, Aitken & Waterman after Bananarama thrown on pitch. 0
bonjonelson 15.06.12 5:03pm
Russian police hunt Mexican hooligan after bandana thrown on pitch. 0
Thor 15.06.12 4:48pm
Balotelli in moral turmoil as opponent slips on banana skin thrown on pitch 0
Haywood Manley 15.06.12 3:43pm
Haywood Manley
Jehovah's WItnesses in Kingdom Hall fracas

Several Jehovah's Witnesses were involved in a brutal clash yesterday morning when their weekly praise session was rudely interrupted by several drunken six pack wielding Football fans, draped in...

simonjmr 15.06.12 2:40pm
Nails UK
IKEA instructions found for Humpty Dumpty 0
Not Amused 15.06.12 2:40pm
Not Amused
Chancellor moves to stimulate banks' shareprices 0
medici2471 15.06.12 1:34pm
Dermatologists making rash decisions 7
seymour totti 15.06.12 12:21pm
Leveson inquiry faces chop due to dwindling viewing figures

Latest reports are claiming that the Leveson inquiry will not be returning to our screens for a second season as viewing figures continue to fall. The show launched in the latter stages of 2011...

Vertically Challenged Giant 15.06.12 11:35am
' Once in a Lifetime' Opportunity for UK Banks

1st in line this morning, Britain’s SME (Smug Morose Egotistical) Bankers eagerly queue up to borrow (Osborne’s £80bl ‘low interest’ windfall) from each other. .. will genuine SME’s...

HenryMJUK 15.06.12 11:20am
Jesus "embarrassed" as God moves "in mysterious ways" at wedding

“Look everyone knows that your dad dancing at a wedding is like sooo embarrassing?” a red faced Messiah said at Cana yesterday. “Well when it’s my dad, let me tell you, it’s extra...

nickb 15.06.12 10:55am
Homeopathic marriages pose concentration risk, warns FSA 0
cinquecento 15.06.12 10:35am
Greek cook turned Toronto novelist creates moose saga 0
cinquecento 15.06.12 10:33am
Olympic Opening Ceremony Set To Be Crap.

Danny Boyle has admitted he’s pocketed £89 million pounds allocated to the Olympics opening ceremony and is just going to ‘bung out a few sheep and chickens onto a bit of grass. They’ll...

daneade 15.06.12 9:16am
Simba “not threatened” by news of Gay Pride parade 0
Yikes 15.06.12 8:42am
Fans' Despair As Drum Solo Looks Set To Make A Return

It was something thought to have been eradicated over thirty years ago, but now fears are growing that the drum solo is set to make a return to live gigs throughout Britain just as we are about to...

Duff 15.06.12 8:41am
Apple defends new iPhone game, Angry Kurds

Apple have come out in defence of Angry Kurds; the long-awaited follow-up to Rovio Mobile's iPhone sensation Angry Birds. Recently appointed Apple CEO, Tim Cook, described the game as “a cheerful...

Qoxiivi 15.06.12 6:45am
Lidl rename cheese 'yummy moo lumps' after letter from moron

Always keen to put the customer first, Lidl has responded to a letter from a moron by renaming all their cheese-flavoured products 'yummy moo lumps'. "We received a letter written in crayon from one...

15.06.12 4:22am
Blatter accepts large bailout from Irish to keep them in the Euro's 0
charlies_hat 14.06.12 10:50pm
Harry Redknapp to replace Cheryl Cole as the new face of L'Oreal. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 14.06.12 8:15pm
Saint & Greavsie In Surprise Lloyd Webber Signing

In a move that's sure to spark controversy with football fans and Muppet aficionados alike iconic football pundits, Saint & Greavsie, have been signed by Lord Lloyd Webber to play Statler and...

Duff 14.06.12 6:21pm
Despite appeals Assange refuses to withdraw 3
medici2471 14.06.12 5:47pm
An Open Letter to the Weather

Dear Weather, It's sad to see you're not well at the moment. What's wrong? Have we done something to upset you? It's not like you're ignored; most conversations mention you at some point. OK, it may...

seymour totti 14.06.12 3:55pm
Chicken ticker confuses Indian newswatchers 1
nickb 14.06.12 2:23pm
seymour totti
Strange Ticker Submission Confuses Morons 2
Textbook 14.06.12 1:41pm