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Thick Scammer booted off NewsBiscuit

in record time, well done ed!...

witless 24.10.11 9:07am
Queen's Personal Assistant arrested - "Helping police with their equarries"

More to follow...

apepper 24.10.11 8:27am
John Ffitch-Rucker
Referendum on UK's EU Membership. Spain to vote NO

Member states of the EU are to be given a vote to decide whether or not to renew the U.K's membership. It is thought that there will be considerable force behind the 'no' vote, especially from the...

Perks 24.10.11 8:18am
John Ffitch-Rucker
New Zealanders 'relieved' as challenge of developing a culture is delayed again 0
Oxbridge 24.10.11 8:18am
Consternation among men as tenth colour is officially announced 0
Oxbridge 24.10.11 8:17am
Steve Jobs to return as cyborg to "destroy Android"

. (tasteless?)...

Nick McCarr 24.10.11 2:29am
Nick McCarr
Terry: "If I was a racist I wouldn't be shagging his wife. Or his mother." 0
dvo4fun 23.10.11 11:40pm
Apathy Society closes down, blames rise in interest rates 5
bonjonelson 23.10.11 9:27pm
IMF admits that Greek bail out loan "was on France to win" 2
FlashArry 23.10.11 9:03pm
UN clampdown on illegal killings

In this day and age, it is anticipated that every deposed megalomaniac dictator - no matter how obviously guilty of crimes both heinous and perverse - will undergo an expensive, elaborate and...

FlashArry 23.10.11 9:00pm
Football fans in Berkshire & Surrey to switch allegiance to Man City 2
GreenCross 23.10.11 8:32pm
Old church blocking access to anti-capitalism demonstration claim 1
roybland 23.10.11 8:26pm
Wedding day soon for Simon Cowell as fiancé buys 10 foot barge pole

Wedding bells may be ringing soon for Simon Cowell as fiancé Mezhgan Hussainy was seen in a well known West-end store buying a 10 foot barge pole...

apepper 23.10.11 7:30pm
Thousands queue outside Esher butcher to view lamb chop

In a historic moment for Esher, thousands lined the high street to catch a glimpse of what may become the most famous cutlet the town will ever see. “I just wanted to do this so I could tell my...

nickb 23.10.11 5:12pm
Stranger than fiction; Tin Tin's Belgium really exists

Steven Spielberg's Tin Tin is a fantasy film, but it does has some links to reality; it turns out there really is a country called Belgium...

apepper 23.10.11 2:17pm
Peter Mandleson missing latest; Harry Potter arrested

Former minister and dark wizard, Peter Mandleson has disappeared. Schoolboy, Harry Potter has been arrested and is assisting police with their enquiries...

apepper 23.10.11 2:07pm
"Let's build a Large Hadron Collider" says Neutrino Action group

"Let's build a Large Hadron Collider" says Neutrino Action group - Rights for Neutrinos Tomorrow. "Then we can find out if we can go faster than the speed of light and journey back in time, like we...

Ranewsbiscuit 23.10.11 1:31pm
Great White claims 'reasonable force' defence after diver trespass attack

A great white shark, of 'the sea, Western Australia', has said he 'acted in self-defence' after killing a diver who he accuses of trespass. The shark is being hunted by officials, but many are...

kga6 23.10.11 12:31pm
Country No One Cares About Wins World Cup In A Sport No One Cares About 0
Mathna 23.10.11 12:07pm
Vatican dismay as Steve Jobs achieves sainthood before Mother Teresa 0
roybland 23.10.11 11:22am
Gaddafi's death caused by capture, claims autopsy Doctor. 0
Mrblacker 23.10.11 10:21am
Gun rules blamed for lack of UK celebrations over Gaddafi's death

Libyan exiles in the UK have blamed to Government's firearms laws on their failure to celebrate the death of Colonel Gaddafi. The country's former leader for the last 42 years died on Thursday after...

Mrblacker 23.10.11 10:18am
Financial Statement from Canon Giles Fraser

The Revd Quasimodo, Chancellor of St Paul’s Bank issued the following statement today (Saturday 22nd October 1482,), "I remain firmly supportive of the right of mugs to trust me with their money,...

arflaethel 23.10.11 10:05am
Tory MP's To Be Housed In Dale Farm....

"Sort of a gradual 'getting use to being out to pasture in the near future,' said a spokesman...

Jesse Bigg 23.10.11 9:15am
Jesse Bigg
Harrow accused of being "old school" 2
Nick McCarr 23.10.11 9:11am
Tories To Change Their Name......

..To "The Wasteland Party." "Eeh, it's a re-run of the 1980's, only worse."...

Jesse Bigg 23.10.11 8:48am
Jesse Bigg
Cameron Orders VAT Increase In Readiness For Another Libyan-Type 'Glory Hole'...

."Sod the public services, I want another jolly - this time without the French!"...

Jesse Bigg 23.10.11 8:32am
Jesse Bigg
Androids left wondering what Steve Jobs had against them

Nick McCarr 23.10.11 7:51am
Nick McCarr
Use of the word "Idiot" is demeaning say Karl Pilkington Community 0
Mathna 23.10.11 7:07am
Temple closes as bearded hippy overthrows the tables of the money changers. 11
button 22.10.11 11:40pm