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Redknapp confirms that the two on-loan pandas from China will train with Spurs 0
SilverWinterSky 4 years

Edinburgh Zoo work placement resolves Beckham insurance concerns...

Aldi still "cheap but baffling”, say shoppers... 7
Doylem 4 years

British shoppers should be accustomed to shopping at Aldi by now, considering that it’s twenty years since the German company opened its first no-frills, bargain-basement store in the UK. Yet the...

Dewsbury cleric almost misses opportunity to take offence... 5
Doylem 4 years

Prominent Muslim cleric, Salman Ishtar, 64, of Dewsbury, was determined to be offended by a BBC2 documentary programme about the Koran. Unable to be offended at the time of transmission, due to a...

Dyslexic pervert tries to buy 10,000 premium blonds. 0
victory V 4 years

More swoon...

Indian labourer backpacks around Britain to find himself 5
Oxbridge 4 years

To his friends among the sub-caste of brick makers in the slums of Nagpur, Miranjit Khapur seemed to have it all: two sheets of corrugated iron on his ceiling, a job that enabled him to have half an...

Liverpool manager Dalglish sacked after no reversal of fortunes 0
fun and games 4 years

Kenny Dalglish has been sensationally sacked by Liverpool football club following a miserable run of form since he took over. Since taking up the reins at Anfield on Saturday the Reds have lost...

Cameron to relax employment laws - 0
Bismarck 4 years

Clegg worried...

protesters co-erced to poke Camilla with a stick 0
Bismarck 4 years

by undercover Royal...

In new spirit of openness, Chinese vice President changes name 0
Bismarck 4 years

to Lee Ker Ching...

Bullitt director dies at 81 (mph) 0
roybland 4 years
tea party on target for election 2
4ty2 4 years, ,

Somalia bans mixed-fruit milkshakes. 0
bonjonelson 4 years

[more soon]...

Giant pandas sent to Scottish zoo 'dying of prostate cancer' claim 2
roybland 4 years
Teens who told their parents to 'shut the fuck up' discover new quality of life 2
roybland 4 years

Three teenagers who got their parents to 'shut the fuck up' for six months say the experience has change their lives for the better. 'We decided like to pull the plug on Mum and Dad for six months,'...

Beckham camp, just a little confirms aide 0
simonjmr 4 years
Palin investigated by OFT for not declaring her weapons interests in her tweets 0
4ty2 4 years

her political statements will also get under scruteny by the advertising standards agency as they clealy promote the use of weapons, so the question is if she is sponsored and by whom...

Democrats to campaign on metaphor control. 0
the coarse whisperer 4 years

"Target", "shoot for", and "ass kick" will require a 72 hour cooling off period and a license...

Heathrow save from future snow chaos with celebs helping out "Big Society" style 0
4ty2 4 years

Kate Moss and Lady Gaga to take on a runway on their own

Dentists invent device to cancel out the sound of Nicky Campbell 3
A Wagonload Of Monkeys 4 years

An invention which cancels out the noise of Nicky Campbell could help people overcome their fear of a dental check-up, researchers say., For many, the sound of Nicky Campbell is a big cause of...

Carpenter moaning about wooden golf equipment told to 'join the club'. 0
Trickster 4 years
Elephant-man lookalike competition, top 3 presented to media. 2
riesler 4 years

BAA invested in an extra wide shovel to counter winter chaos treat. 0
Stan 4 years

An initial inquiry into the apparent ‘slow reaction’ of Heathrow Airport to deal with last month’s snow has revealed that the ‘major investment in counter snow technology’ announced by BAA...

Time travel 'already commonplace' admits athlete and peer Lord Stephen Hawking 6
dicky37 4 years

Lord Stephen Hawking, the most accomplished sprinter Britain has ever produced, claimed last night that physicists have travelled backwards and forwards through the ages 'for some time'; altering the...

Matt Cardle targets Rihanna’s number one slot 3
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
US Republican Party announces new strategy: Kill Whoever Disagrees With Us 1
Grover 4 years

Following the commencement of the 112th Congress of the United States, newly-inaugurated Speaker of the House of Representatives John Boehner has announced a new Republican strategy for "taking back...

“‘Social notworking’ the bane of office life”, says work/life guru... 0
Doylem 4 years

“The internet is no friend of productivity”, says Simon Luckhurst, Professor of Online Procrastination Studies at the Institute of Work/Life Balance, Crewe. “A huge amount of time is wasted,...

Sarah Palin Condemns Poor Marksmanship of Arizona Shooter 0
Grover 4 years

"If you can't make a kill-shot, you shouldn't own a gun!" says idiot who hunts wolves from a helicopter...

Only politicians who can duck quickly should stand for Congress, says NRA. 1
Griffin 4 years
Etta James, Ira Gerswin, the last musicians named after terrorist organisations. 0
Doylem 4 years
Somalia Bans Mixed-Sex Handshakes.... 1
De-scribe 4 years

"Suppose a blow job's out of the question then?" asks tourist...