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Royals order cull of strawberry blond males in advance of 2011 Royal Wedding. 0
simonjmr 4 years

Also Hewitts, Parkers and Bowles under threat. More soon...

Palace justifies white wedding on grounds "she hasn't popped her chocolate 0
the coarse whisperer 4 years

cherry yet". Poor taste? I hope so...

NIB - Ireland challenges Portugal to a Eurozone stare-out 1
MC One R 4 years

Following Portugal's request for Ireland to act "for the good of the Eurozone", Ireland has challenged Portugal to a financial stare-out. First to blink has to ask the EU for a bail-out, and will be...

HP celebrates the launch of their 5 thousandth different kind of ink cartridge. 3
deskpilot3 4 years

Bitter experience or what?...

“Royal wedding will boost tourism”, says travel agents... 0
Doylem 4 years

A spokesman for Thomson Holidays is bullish about the tourism benefits that another royal wedding will bring. “It could be just the shot in the arm the travel industry needs. In the wake of the...

Sky Box Office Present - Will & Kate - Ultimate Wedding Judgement Day - £15.95 0
IABP 4 years

It's the first time since Charles married Diana that a Royal wedding has registered on the Remotely Interested Scale and you can experience the doomed relationship and live through all the tension...

Queen starts planning car crash 0
Sinnick 4 years
Governemt Delighted at Royal Wedding Diversion 0
Dun Dunkin 4 years

Now there are months to bury bad news...

The AA and Alcoholics Anonymous to produce range of batteries 4
Sinnick 4 years
“Virgins leave a lot to be desired”, says disaffected 7/7 martyr... 0
Doylem 4 years

Hasib Hussain was just 18 years old when he blew himself up, on a bus in Tavistock Square, London, along with 13 other passengers. This act of terrorism, in support of the holy Jihad, assured Hasid...

Prince Harry gets drunk and kills a hooker in desperate bid for front page 0
Andrew 4 years

See page 5...

29 storey burning block of flats in China still standing as 0
arrghgarry 4 years

demolition experts forgot to pull it , a Jew did not have it insured for 5 times what it was worth and China was not waiting to invade a country...

Xbox Kinect ‘Runs on Blood of Virgins’ 5
BobBobbington 4 years

My first topic! I hope I've burst my article-virginity in a good way, and I won't look back on it with a mixture of shame and horror. Xbox Kinect ‘Runs on Blood of Virgins’ Steve Ballmer, the...

Briton Speaks Out After Honeymoon Ordeal 0
De-scribe 4 years

The British man forced to do that sex thing with his wife on honeymoon in Kefalonia has spoken out after his ordeal. Mark Richards, 30, of Northampton told a press conference in Argistoli that he...

Haemorrhoid dust picked up by Japanese probe. 0
scooooter 4 years
British terrorists call for re-opening of Guantanamo Bay 2
Gerontius 4 years

Disgruntled British terrorists who were denied the opportunity of being tortured and interrogated at Guantanamo Bay are calling on MI5 to have the facility re-opened., The call has taken British...

Mark Mother-Zucker launches 'next generation of e-piffle' 1
arflaethel 4 years

Mother-Zucker, speaking pure Web-Drivel 2.0 in San-Franscisco-by-the Seaside whilst seated on a donkey and adorned with flowers in his hair, feverishly waved a bunch of Palm leaves and proclaimed...

Shortage of trivia threatening pub quizzes... 0
Doylem 4 years

Pub quizzes have kept a lot of pubs in business, persuading people to come out on a wet Monday night to answer trivia questions. But times are hard, and a lot of drinkers prefer to stay at home,...

Sacked Charity Shop Worker “Didn’t Fuss About Enough” 13
De-scribe 4 years

Charity shop worker Gladys Evans, 72, was sacked for gross misconduct when visiting bosses observed her “not being fussy enough”, a disciplinary hearing was told today. Steve Drummond, regional...

Facebook buys rights to MS Office's paperclip helper. 0
martin2381 4 years
Protestant sect wiped out by Alexander Technique 0
Des Custard 4 years

A once-flourishing protestant sect in Skelmersdale has disbanded after more than 200 years. A church that survived the industrial revolution, world wars and flu epidemics lost its entire...

Processed breasts recalled in America. 1
Griffin 4 years
Publicists confirm Carol Vorderman suffering from Benjamin Button Syndrome 2
Milo Shame 4 years

Publicists for the ex-Countdown star have confirmed in a press release the sad news that Carol Vorderman is suffering from Benjamin Button Syndrome. Recent pictures in leading style magazines like...

Police Sarcasm Detection Unit struggling to cope with mass terror tweets 5
Moggsy 4 years

The Metropolitan Police's crack team of highly trained experts in tongue in cheek humour and satire are overstretched due to the high level of potential terror threats posted on social networking...

Harry Hill to launch hard-hitting "News Burp" 1
Andrew 4 years
Manchester police are looking into complaints that "Fraudley Harrsion " 0
arrghgarry 4 years

was running an avoidance scam...

Nintendo release baffling game package containing only a football 0
Dumbnews 4 years
Audley harrison to face biggest fight of his life against the 1
arrghgarry 4 years

Boxing Board of Control and he is shitting himself...

TSA entice passengers for pat-downs with no cover charge and tipping policy 0
Dumbnews 4 years
Newly freed Aung San Suu Kyi busy setting up her profile on 0
Dumbnews 4 years