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Microsoft invents more ways for fat fingered typists to self destruct 0
ronseal 4 years

Microsoft's guerilla war with the layman is to be stepped up, with more inventitve ways to root out non techies and render them powerless. It is thought to be working on a series of 'new innovations'...

Tom Still Waiting for Myspace Film 5
Grover 4 years

Tom, founder of the previously popular social networking site [i]Myspace[/i] (formerly [i]MySpace[/i]), has announced via Twitter that he is expecting Hollywood to make a film about him, for some...

Downing street deny reason for losing bid 0
Bismarck 4 years

was that the waxwork of David Cameron went to Zurich by mistake...

Russia are Putin on the Ritz 0
Bismarck 4 years

Finally we can afford cheese for our biscuits says 132 yr old Ludmilla Yakomova, the oldest member of the russian bid team...

Southern Trains PR boss wins title of Britain's Next Top Muddle 0
ronseal 4 years

The PR boss of Southern Trains has won the coveted award of Britain's Next Top Muddle, after admitting she had no idea how many trains were still stuck in the snow with passengers in them...

Pound coin thief still at large 0
Mr.3374 4 years

In spite of calling in a helicopter equipped with thermal imaging cameras, the culprit seems to have just blended in with the background...

Brass monkey looking for a welder who works weekends. 0
MC One R 4 years
Cutbacks force Cameron to reduce the number of days of Christmas from 12 to 6 1
Ian Searle 4 years

Gone to are the Eight maids a-milking, due to the decimation of the dairy industry. The Twelve drummers drumming, and Eleven pipers piping, have all been served with ASBOs to prevent them causing...

Low Temperatures Cause Widespread Ice Shock 0
MC One R 4 years

More weather revelations soon...

Mick Hucknall sorry for '3,000 seconds of promiscuity' 1
fernandomando 4 years
Kent Police Tell Chatham Mother To Stop Using £2 Coins For Snowman's Eyes.... 0
Jesse Bigg 4 years

as they are bound to attract down and out ex-England World Cup Team bidders into the area...

Angel of the North and Brass Monkey ‘no longer an item’ say friends 0
Gerontius 4 years

Angel of the North told he can put his arms down now, after video evidence eventually proves Harmisons opener in the last Ashes series was definitely wide...

Over 3000 women sorry they've slept with Mick Hucknall 0
Moggsy 4 years
"I'll just come in my trousers" says perverted fancy dress party goer. 0
surdoux 4 years
UK Dole Queue Lengthens.... 1
Jesse Bigg 4 years

due to 300 million EU citizens arriving to try their luck...

FA announces new bid team for 2026-2030 2
MC One R 4 years

1. Peter Sutcliffe 2. Rosemary West 3. Cheryl Cole...

Big Freeze To Continue.... 0
Jesse Bigg 4 years

.as Cameron takes up the reins...

Australian grape farmers relieved that soured crops will be taken by Ponting. 1
Basil_B 4 years
Outlook still frosty after 20 years of marriage claims 45 year old man 0
simonjmr 4 years
10 tell tale signs that BBC Panorama World Cup doco was directed by the Kremlin 4
ronseal 4 years

The Daily Wail has uncovered ten incontrovertible pieces of evidence that prove the BBC's World Cup Bid spoiler documentary was directed by the Kremlin. FACT ONE: All BBC employees are chinless,...

Unemployed urged to buy things they do not need to stimulate job growth 0
Dumbnews 4 years
Survey finds most celebrating Christmas are not Christians 0
Dumbnews 4 years
Only 15 more parcel stealing days before Xmas, says post sorting office geezer 4
StoopyDeGunt 4 years
Fifa: Fixed it for Arabs... 0
Doylem 4 years
UK press launch bid to supply all Russian stereotype requirements 3
MC One R 4 years
Survey shows UK businessmen get '50% more British' when in the US 2
Golgo13 4 years

Male British business travellers to the United States exaggerate their Britishness by an average of 50%, claims a new study issued by Accentia, the dialect, jargon and accent monitoring group....

Woman attacked in own home by 1KG bar of Cadbury's Dairy Milk 3
BarneyRubble 4 years [quote]Jennifer Duncan yesterday[/quote] A woman from Luton was attacked in her own home yesterday by a...

Players train in England to prepare for Siberia 2022... 0
Doylem 4 years
New labelling for extra-strong beers: ‘Binge responsibly’... 0
Doylem 4 years
FIFA 'we were just sick of hearing that F***ing Elbow song' 0
MADJEZ 4 years

More corporate video-ness soon...