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Kim Jong Dead - he'd been Il for a while 5
simonjmr 19.12.11 4:24pm
Nick Clegg ponders if his work / life balance is right? 0
simonjmr 19.12.11 4:23pm
Obituary - Kim Jong-il

Kim Jong-il has today died at the age of 69 from, according to local media, a severe case of caring too much. A secretive figure, much of what we know about his life is cobbled together from official...

Newsquelch 19.12.11 4:00pm
Cruel dictator dies of overwork

International news agencies have been reporting the death of a notorious tyrant and the leader of a secretive kleptomaniac society. Under his rule, millions of his people were kept in starvation and...

DorsetBoy 19.12.11 3:47pm
Kim Nominated with Posthumous Oscar for role as Kim Jong-il

Yuri Irsenovich Kim is to be nominated for a posthumous Oscar and Life time achievement award at the forth coming 84th Academy Award Ceremony in February. Kim, who famously undertook the role of...

A.Parody 19.12.11 3:47pm
Strictly and Dr Who stars back plan to rename BBC News as ‘News about the BBC’ 2
Duncan Biscuit 19.12.11 3:04pm
Ten million versions of "I was Jong-il's double" published in North Korea. 0
dominic_mcg 19.12.11 3:02pm
Cat’s life in balance as resistance develops to latest cat food

The life of Tibby, 7, from Carshalton, hangs in the balance today after she developed resistance to the latest, most powerful cat food last weekend. For months she had been kept alive by one...

Des Custard 19.12.11 2:50pm
EUripedes.... clothes off and underneath is.... SUPERCAM!!!!!!! He pushes planets out of orbit!, he leaps buildings with a single bound!!!, . he can resist pissing...

Son of Barnabas 19.12.11 1:56pm
Son of Barnabas
Football referees 'wreaking revenge on society' claims new report

Contrary to the widely-held belief that referees do their best at an increasingly difficult job, a new study claims that they are actually jumped-up, self-important control freaks expressing their...

Midfield Diamond 19.12.11 1:55pm
Midfield Diamond
Donald Neilson dies. Theme from Midnight Cowboy guaranteed Xmas No1.

is that right?...

wallster 19.12.11 1:48pm
Kim Jong Ill to be replaced by Jeffrey Bernard. More soon. 0
Al OPecia 19.12.11 1:32pm
Al OPecia
Environmentally conscious carpet cleaner tormented by his carbon footprint 0
medici2471 19.12.11 1:29pm
Joy as Footballers Wives goes to Christmas Number One

[digitally remastered in anticipation] It has been described as the ultimate feel-good story, an anthem sung by a choir made up entirely of the wives of Britain's heroic footballers, and it has now...

Oxbridge 19.12.11 1:11pm
Car traditionalists mourn as the last original Citroen Saxo gets pimped.

Wierdy beardy traditionalists were crying into their warm brown beer this weekend as it was announced that there are now no Citroen Saxo's remaining in their original condition. The last one was...

grottymonty 19.12.11 12:57pm
Wikileaks Trial: Bradley Manning to reveal family link to Bernard

Leaked information from the team defending Bradley Manning shows that he was deeply affected by the close family ties he had with his uncle, the late Bernard Manning. Few people know that British...

nickb 19.12.11 12:51pm
BB cured by AA

B B King said he can’t express his gratitude enough to Alcoholics Anonymous for helping him kick the bottle. ‘Goddadmit, I was fucked-up good n proper,’ said the original Black Blues man from...

malgor 19.12.11 12:18pm
Mixing metaphors - We ask, 'Is this the thin end of the slippery slope?' 3
Smart Alex 19.12.11 12:17pm
Son of Barnabas
Tombliboo un takes charge in North Korea 0
grottymonty 19.12.11 12:11pm
Kim Jong II to be succeeded by brother Jim 0
Drylaw 19.12.11 12:10pm
King Kong II release causes panic in South Korea 0
medici2471 19.12.11 11:36am
Kim Jong Ill to be succeeded by Kim Jong Unwell

Kim Jong Offcolour expected in 2025 as Korean health standards show slight improvement...

tedweasel 19.12.11 11:31am
Smart Alex
Hague fury as Kim Jong Il death too late to stop Xmas card

Foreign Secretary William Hague has today spoken of his anger that North Korean leader Kim Jong Il couldn’t have died a couple of days sooner, prior to the UK sending him a Christmas card....

ianslat 19.12.11 11:12am
US awaits ascension of Kim Jong III 2
Nick McCarr 19.12.11 10:37am
Vertically Challenged Giant
Liberal Democrats forced to admit 'Saint Nick' Clegg does not exist.

As another generation of children face their first Christmas with the knowledge that Father Christmas is a mythical made up person, Lib Dems up and down the country face a bombshell of their own. It...

Perks 19.12.11 10:37am
Chinese Maritime Shipping Bonds downgraded to junk 3
DorsetBoy 19.12.11 10:35am
Oversubscribed Middlesbrough school credits ‘satisfactory’ Ofsted report

A school in Middlesbrough that previously failed to attract average pupils has been deluged with applications for the 2012/13 school year. Joan Mydil, Head Teacher at Lusitania Comprehensive, says...

Gong of Fur 19.12.11 10:34am
Ant and Dec to host Jong-il exit show 0
charlies_hat 19.12.11 10:11am
Neville Chamberlain posthumously sacked due to Hitler photo 3
charlies_hat 19.12.11 10:04am
Six rescued in Yorkshire airlift, 8 million still stranded 1
Duncan Biscuit 19.12.11 9:53am