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New Blackberry phone model to incorporate on/off switch 3
bonjonelson 4 years

For the first time in its 14 year history, Research in Motion's Blackberry mobile phone handset is going to come fitted with a function allowing the device to be turned off. "To be honest, this was...

International Jewish Conspiracy plots next steps in wrecking Mel Gibson's career 6
Oxbridge 4 years

Senior Jewish conspirators from across the globe are convening at a secret location in Los Angeles this week to further their ongoing schemes. High on the agenda, second only to the continued...

Arsenal 3 - Partizan Belgrade 1 1
Mafaking Carwongo 4 years

Gunners beat the 10 man Serbian Partisans 3 - 1. 'I only wish we'd sent them out there during the Kosovo crisis.' Said a miltary spokesman, and football fan...

Graceland gardeners find Elvis still breathing 1
Sinnick 4 years
barristers last words before he was killed were "I can`t hear you clearly 0
arrghgarry 4 years

if I dont put the gun down youll what ?"...

Little Boy Blue sick of having to "blow his own trumpet" 0
Ian Searle 4 years

Little Bo Peep banned from keeping sheep...

Special previews for Private Eye Readers of 'Legend of the Grauniad' in D3 0
Ian Searle 4 years
Miliband E Shocks Conference By Stating That His Parents Were Wrong... 0
LtFrankSlade 4 years

To Have David. The new Labour leader who stressed he was not born at the time distanced himself from his parents' decision to have David back in 1965. "It's easy with hindsight to see why they...

Sky launches AD-HD TV for people with short attention sp… 0
Ian Searle 4 years

Is that an aeroplane or a helicopter?...

Al-Qaeda plot uncovered, vegetable crop in ruins 0
QorbeQ 4 years

UK security officers, working on behalf of intelligence agency MI5, have uncovered a suspected al-Qaeda vegetable plot on an allotment just outside Hampstead Heath in North London. The site remains...

Workers Who Have to Clock Off to Smoke Discover The Secret On How to Quit 0
IABP 4 years

Workers who have to clock off to smoke have discovered the secret on how to quit smoking. Since the policy was introduced virtually all of the smokers have cut down considerably but most have...

Vulnerable elderly forced to pay for medical care. 0
Mafaking Carwongo 4 years

Stephen Dorrell, chairman of the health committee says 'patients with dementia used to get free care in NHS geriatric hospitals, now they are being forced to pay., The good news is they don't...

Al-Qaeda terror plot 0
Mafaking Carwongo 4 years

Security agencies in Europe say there is probably a significant plot to carry out terrorist raids in Europe. Some time. Somewhere. Because that's what they do isn't it. And anyway we are desperate...

Obama announces adoption of Jimi Hendrix’s version of the Star Spangled Banner 0
JayGee 4 years

Barack Obama has announced plans to change the US national anthem, amid a fierce backlash from traditionalist factions. After a long process of focus groups and consultation with his wife, the...

Basil Brush warns cuts in wartime will have grave consequences. 0
Mafaking Carwongo 4 years

He can be forgiven for not seeing the awful pun, he is afterall, only a fox., And a Tory...

Mothercare tell Miliband job in toy and pram department has already been filled 0
Nobby Holder 4 years

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh...

'Disaster' to be redefined after model reads out wrong name... 0
be reasonable 4 years

Australian media have completely redefined the word 'disaster' after the compare of 'this years top model' named the wrong girl as the winner of the competition live on TV. The error was immediately...

Alcoholism 'halved at a stroke' as Wetherspoons introduce 3D Beer Goggles 3
pinxit 4 years

You're lovely you are...

Gordon Ramsay drives second chef to suicide... 0
be reasonable 4 years

following thousands of ordinary television viewers., A second chef appears to have killed himself after a tirade from the foul-mouthed Scottish food manipulator and retired ball-kicker. The chef...

Waitrose set to muscle in on Satire 0
afternoonslow 4 years

By Andrea Bumf, Published: September 29 2010, Waitrose is poised to expand its online business in direct competition with Newsbiscuit, the internet grocer 'n' satire store...

David and Edmund Milliband to give advice to young men how to get that charmer 0
arrghgarry 4 years

for a wife,...

Ed Moribund's keynote speech draws on immortal lines from Monkees' hit single 0
Scroat 4 years

More 'We're the new generation' bollocks soon...

David Moribund "Not a happy bunny" says party spokesman 0
Scroat 4 years

More Moribund soon...

Pronunciation dilemma as P&O pull out of rtsmuth 1
MrChigleysAunt 4 years
Party faithful reject Dave... 0
be reasonable 4 years

blaming him for endless repeats of 'Top Gear' and Fred Dibnah programmes., A party spokesperson said "we can't stand Clarkson because he likes cars and is probably a Tory, and Fred only reminds us...

"Don't worry" Miliband tells nation, "I'll be just like other politicians&q 0
la maga 4 years
Weeping Karzai a creeping Rose to be entered at the next Chelsea 0
arrghgarry 4 years

flower show...

Ed Moribund doesn't like new nickname. 3
be reasonable 4 years
Eating disorder charity criticised for throwing gala fund raising dinner 0
brownpaperreporter 4 years

Unions roundly condemned BEAT, the Eating Disorder charity after many of their members complained about the aftermath of the charity dinner. John Eccles explains "We are wholly supportive of the...

John West announce 'Arsefish Unfriendly' tinned tuna. 0
thecritic 4 years

Following massive criticism of the fishing industry in recent years, John West today officially announced the new certification of all of their tinned tuna products as being particularly harmful to...