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Prof Brian Cox wins ‘Face you would most like to slap’ award. 10
Des and Stan 4 years

There was unanimous approval at the tenth annual Nivea Awards ceremony last night when Professor Brian Cox was the runaway winner of the male category of the prestigious ‘Face you would most like...

Police to be given Sherlock Holmes training to improve detection 4
Basil_B 4 years

Home Secretary Theresa May announced plans today to improve the detection rate of police officers by making them read up on the complete works of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's famous detective character...

‘Moon on a stick by 2015’ says upbeat Cameron 2
jp1885 4 years

Following a month of mass protests, international catastrophes and a continual rise in unemployment, Prime Minister David Cameron has sought to boost the morale of the nation by publicly renewing his...

Man Facing £4k Credit Card Bill For ‘The Perfect Mother’s Day Gift’ 0
Vertically Challenged Giant 4 years

24 year old Paul Taylor from Leicester found out last year how much trouble forgetting mother’s day can cause. When he was faced with frosty stares and silence on March 14th 2010 he was struggling...

Schoedinger not sure if Elephant is in room 0
Sinnick 4 years
Elephant found in room of House that Looks Like Hitler 1
ronseal 4 years
Never mind the Bolsheviks, here's Anchor Butter - sings punk rock 'legend' 1
ronseal 4 years

Johnny Rotten, the icon for a generation of misplaced optimism, is to release an updated version of the punk rock anthems associated with him. Never Mind the Bolsheviks - Here's a Corporate Message...

Pets At Home Cancels it's Proposed In Store 'Room Elephant Service', 0
4 years

after an uneasy stand off, five or so minutes silence, and little or no eye contact between staff, the customer and Elephant...

Capello learns his one hundred and first word so he can say "Over the moon" 0
Tammy Flugh 4 years
Daily Mail finds British newspaper that used to like Hitler 0
rickwestwell 4 years
100 word vocabulary still 85 words too many for Rooney 0
simonjmr 4 years
Great-great-grandparents to be given access to great-great-grandchildren. 0
Tammy Flugh 4 years

More generations later...

Hallmark eyes up the blessed virgin 10
NewSuburbanDad 4 years

Hallmark cards announced plans today to rebadge the feast of the Blessed Virgin Mary this August, and make it the focus of a global marketing campaign. The festival, provisionally subtitled...

Charlie TIger Blood Sheen is the new poster boy for Frosties - they're gurrreat! 0
ronseal 4 years
Elephant denies there are people in the room 0
Sinnick 4 years
Sad irony as elephant's foot umbrella stand in the room is noticed by everybody 0
rickwestwell 4 years
Muskie Muskrat, Moley Mole & Deputy Dawg to join Moussa Koussa in Libyan exodus 0
timyarby 4 years

More cartoon characters later!...

Elephant in room shot by poachers 4
jp1885 4 years
Man who doesn't like to gaze 0
be reasonable 4 years

accused of being a homophone...

Missile, artillery strikes throw doubt over debut of Libya's Got Talent 0
QorbeQ 4 years

Entertainment guru Simon Cowell is reported to be "a touch narky" following news that the pilot episode of Libya's Got Talent, set to be recorded this weekend, has been put on hold due to heavy-arms...

House that looks like Hitler causes internet sensation... 5
be reasonable 4 years

"I really must get a new haircut" said Mr. Laurie...

Elephant in room puts his head down and makes for the bowl of peanuts 0
ronseal 4 years

The Elephant in the Room has made a strategic decision to head for the buffet table and start scooping up peanuts. Insiders say he's become withdrawn and self conscious, as people seem to regard...

England cricket team to be chosen by whether you can add 'y' to their name 2
John Wiltshire 4 years

After their dismal performance in the Cricket World Cup, the England cricket team managers have announced that they will use a new method of selecting players., At a news conference, captain Andrew...

Libyan Foreign Minister defects to UK after hearing there may soon be a vacancy 1
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
British Forces attack Libyan rebel bassist... 0
be reasonable 4 years

'that'll teach the fucker to practice 'smoke on the water' at three in the morning" said Wing-Commander Marcus Sherwood-Jenkins...

Nicole Scherzinger to be re-branded for UK audience 0
jp1885 4 years

In a move designed to improve singles sales in Great Britain, Harvey Meredith, publicist for American pop sensation Nicole Scherzinger, has announced that the former Pussycat Doll is to be re-branded...

Obama to send guns to Libyan rebels but is still undecided on sending bullets 1
Basil_B 4 years
British forces attack Libyan rebel bases 0
Bravenewmalden 4 years

"It was a misunderstanding", said Flight Lieutenant Bill 'Bill' Williams. "We thought people were asking us to 'harm' the Libyan rebels."...

Guardian exclusive: Libyan foreign minister Moussa Koussa defecates... 0
be reasonable 4 years
UK expels five librarians by mistake 3
Tammy Flugh 4 years