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Wayne Roonie re-signs 5 year contract for Man United 1
bonjonelson 4 years

[well, I assumed it's a joke]...

London cycle hire scheme to be extended to all UK to help jobless 1
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
Moon’s Cheese “Could be Harvested” says NASA 0
De-scribe 4 years

Following the news that there are oases of water-rich soil which could sustain astronauts on the Moon, NASA has announced a further research project to examine the feasibility of exploiting the...

Rooney re-signs as only Exeter City wanted him after his poor world cup. 0
Basil_B 4 years
Angelina Jolie announces plans to adopt entire African country 0
dogwheels 4 years

Actress Angelena Jolie has announced plans to adopt an entire African country in what some are seeing as a clear bid to upstage adoption rival Madonna. Madonna, real name Pauline, is the...

Abuse shouting Utd fans move away from Rooney house to let Everton fans back in 0
Basil_B 4 years
Striking Aerobics Instructors Step Up Protest 1
De-scribe 4 years
Cameron says the Government itself is cutting back and all cabinet meetings 0
arrghgarry 4 years

will be downgraded from chocolate hobnobs to custard creams,However when asked if some cabinet members would be able to bring in their own Chocolate hobnobs and claim them on expenses ,like a...

“Cowboy builders wrecked my home” claims housewife 0
De-scribe 4 years

“From the moment they arrived and tethered their horses to the garden fence, I knew there was something wrong”, said Mrs Rita Arnold, of Chorley., “They kept having to “mosey off into...

Prostitutes say they will take to the streets if Rooney leaves Manchester 2
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
Oxford man left homeless as new lexmark printer goes mad and blows up his house. 2
Basil_B 4 years

Speaking to local reporters outside the charred remains of what was once 129 Marlborough Crescent, the still shaken former owner Michael Worthington tried to explain away the bizarre encounter he had...

Google admit street view maps around Isle of Skye "piss poor" 0
Erlang 4 years

Google today pulled offline their street view maps of the Skye area, due to "piss poor quality issues" Google stated that no-one in the area uses them for mission critical navigation and that as...

Nuclear submarine HMS Astute 'grounded on "stealth" rocks' 0
4 years

The Royal Navy's newest and largest attack submarine HMS Astute has got into difficulty off Skye, the Ministry of Defence (MoD) has confirmed. An eye-witness said the rocks - described as the...

Rooney protesters shout abuse at Madamme Louise's massage parlour in Manchester. 0
Basil_B 4 years

'There was more chance of him being in there than at home' remarked one of the protesters...

Furious onboard row about XFactor caused submarine grounding, confirms MoD 0
JayGee 4 years
Morgan Freeman to play Bilbo in 'The Hobbit' 0
bonjonelson 4 years

[more soon]...

Job seekers see the funny side as cuts force councils to withdraw bus services 0
Duncan Biscuit 4 years
Amnesty International admits to running secret prison in Ukraine 1
bonjonelson 4 years

Amnesty International have today revealed that for the last four years they have been helping to run a secret prison in the southern Ukranian region of Crimea. "We, to be honest, were somewhat...

Satirical anti-war Poet to be posthumously honoured 3
De-scribe 4 years

More Sassoon .., ., ., ., ., ., ., (with apologies to bonjonelson)...

World's smallest orchestra unveils the Nano Tuba 2
bonjonelson 4 years

[more bassoon]...

Tories to keep warm this winter using Lib Dem Turncoats... 0
Psycadelic Squirrel 4 years

This weak, limp garment will fold to your every wish with minimal resistance...

Work starts to allocate 500,000 public sector workers to new private sector jobs 1
De-scribe 4 years

More soon....

Authority of Parliament challenged as Super-Council now covers whole of UK 0
pinxit 4 years

Except the Isle of Wight. [Reuters: 22nd October 2014]...

Arthur Scargill to give next Margaret Thatcher Lecture 0
roybland 4 years
'Alarm' at BBC Radio 4 as cutbacks make Greenwich pips squeak 2
pinxit 4 years
Hutton Report also confirms Godwinson, Boleyn, and Howard deaths were suicide. 0
Nobby Holder 4 years

No shortage of blood there...

Rooney story officially upgraded to saga 0
dogwheels 4 years

The ongoing drama surrounding wantaway Manchester United strikers Wayne Rooney will officially become a saga after famed author Michael Crichton announced he is to pen a series of novels on the...

Grammar Nazi's facing new trial's at Nurenberg over they're annoying behaviour. 2
bonjonelson 4 years

[more soon]...

Public sector worker declairs immortality .... 0
one against the world 4 years

just to bugger up the goverment figures...

Camelot announces the 113million poundsLottery Mrs Linda Brown 0
arrghgarry 4 years

of Acacia gardens wishes to remain anonymous ,we of course respect her wishes...