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MSP quits Holyrood role after accidentally calling minger 'attractive' 0
QorbeQ 3 years

'Really sorry, I must be blind, she was fuck ugly -- you need someone with better judgement on the committee'...

Doncaster the focus of Another Bloody Sunday inquiry 0
Mr.3374 3 years

Look it up on you tube...

When oh when will these interminable summer evenings end? 0
la maga 3 years

Say early-to-bed Brits, after moaning about the heat. In winter the same Brits were moaning about the cold and the shortness of the days. In spring they were overheard commenting on the changeability...

iPad to be supplied with 'new book smell' app. 1
Ian Searle 3 years
Obama says those responsible for Bhopal need to clean up 1
hero2zero 3 years

President Obama stated that when he has "Sorted BP" he would force those responsible at Union Carbide to clean up the Bhopal site even twenty-six years after the disaster...

Police launch ‘Fresh Inquiry’, ‘UK-wide Manhunt’ and other oddly-named boats 0
dicky37 3 years

[More soon]...

Rooney say's world cup football moves around in the air especially when kicked 0
Basil_B 3 years

Twenty years since kicking a football for the first time and he's just worked that one out., Bless...

BP call on Juan Sheet to clear up oil spill. 0
Ian Searle 3 years

Juan Sheet is all it takes...

Switzerland's World Cup begins by naming a squad of 20 defenders and 3 goalies 0
simonjmr 3 years
Latest Gimmicky Learning Wheeze Unveiled as London Borough to Provide "Books" 0
thisisall1word 3 years

The London borough of Hackney Council has today launched a scheme hoping to get more school kids interested in the works of Charles Dickens. The scheme, the first of its kind for the UK, will see...

BP bosses bring own oil to Obama grilling 0
andhrimnir 3 years
After Cameron apology, Martin Mcguiness's smugness rating goes through the roof. 2
Basil_B 3 years
Shropshire man says 'No!' 0
PluckyMunky 3 years

more later...

U2 to release updated protest song "Thank crunchie it's Friday!" 1
Iamthestig 3 years

As an ode to Cadbury's fate, Legendary rock band U2 are to release a new protest song using the backing track of their classic "Sunday, Bloody Sunday." The new song is choc full of anti-corporation...

Government Rebrands Unemployed as "People Of Leisure" 0
Svendo 3 years

In a bid to cut the number of unemployed in Britain the Cameron/Clegg gestalt entity have reclassified large swathes of the jobless as "people of leisure". The reclassifications come after new...

Barking protesters told to tone it down to a woof. 0
Basil_B 3 years
GCSE Rocket science now so easy, saying to change to "It's not media studies..." 0
Rorschach 3 years

a) More soon, b) The answer is (a), c) I meant the right answer but my pencil slipped...

BP collects record number of Nectar Points in June 0
Iamthestig 3 years

We hope to be able to pay for an entire Big Shop in Sainsbury's soon. Just avoid the frozen bird aisle would be my advice...

ITV accuse David Dickenson of "ambush advertising" for Tango. 1
Ian Searle 3 years
FIFA ban girls in tight-fitting orange dresses.... 3
Ostsee 3 years

because they do not have the approved vuvuzelas...

Milletts and other outdoor pursuits retailers worried about hike in VAT. 0
Basil_B 3 years
Robbie Earle slams FIFA for advertising 'not officially a beer' 6
nealdoran 3 years

Gazza's Korean cousin seen crying during anthem ceremony. 0
Basil_B 3 years
Obama: US to bring democracy to BP. 1
simonjmr 3 years
Some scientists say sperm whale faeces could prevent global warming 1
gregle 3 years

others say it's just a load of crap...

Retirement age to be raised to 105 for men, 100 for women 1
PluckyMunky 3 years

'It is a necessary means of stabilising the economy', said the Chancellor, 'and I know the public will appreciate it. It won't affect me as I have considerable, personal wealth.I do care for common...

New Zealand internationals surprised at selection of 'Sunday league' defender > 5
QorbeQ 3 years

Result: Brazilian samba drums 5000 decibels African vuvuzela 10000 decibels 0
Basil_B 3 years

Vuvuzela top the noise pollution group by 5000 decibels. If the vuvuzela wins the group they will then go on to play the incoming and outgoing airplanes at Heathrow airport in the quarter finals...

After 12 years Saville enquiry finally agrees with Bono it isn't a rebel song 0
simonjmr 3 years

£200 million also expected to be spent to feel it coming in the air tonight. More soon...

Radical grammar pedants demand BBC rename hit show 'Dr Whom'. 11
nealdoran 3 years

More soon. [I honestly don't know -- or particularly care -- if there's any grammatical basis for arguing for a change, I just like saying 'Dr Whom'. It goes from cute to bloody annoying in under 6...