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Head scratching at Thames Water over where they might find water during drought 1
Smart Alex 14.03.12 4:10pm
Tech-savvy toddlers 'falling over themselves' for BBC's 3D-eebies

Britain's toddlers and babies are making a beeline for the latest 'must have' home entertainment craze, following successful trials of the BBC's new 3D children's channel. 3D-eebies is available...

14.03.12 3:12pm
Now Obama will let Cameron play with his Lego

President Barack Obama will today let David Cameron play with his Lego and possibly have a go on his Nintendo DS. Already Cameron has had a ride on Obama's aeroplane and has been to a basketball...

roybland 14.03.12 2:49pm
Gourd Almighty
John McCririck humanely shot at Cheltenham after spraining ankle 3
charlies_hat 14.03.12 2:38pm
Gourd Almighty
Lady GaGa decides on wedding dress made entirely from spam 2
charlies_hat 14.03.12 2:17pm
Othello- The Obama Version

OTHELLO REWRITTEN, (OUR PARDONS TO SHAKESPEARE) Dramatis Personae, IAGO- Advisor to Othello - played by Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, CASSIO- Lieutenant to Othello, husband of Iago –...

14.03.12 2:17pm
Cameron jokes that Afghan War is 'hard to win'

British Prime Minister David Cameron has admitted he is struggling to win the war in Afghanistan, calling it "fast and furious". In a joint interview with the president at half-time during a...

theadministrator 14.03.12 12:44pm
Cameron delighted to fly with Obama on Airforce 1!

but 'puzzled' to find Harrison Ford in aeroplane toilet?...

theadministrator 14.03.12 12:42pm
Sky HD Subscribers "overwhelmed" by fact that they can receive the F1 channel

This weekend, millions will tune in to watch a Grand Prix simply because Sky Broadcasting has provided the channel free to HD subscribers. Sky viewer Barry Jones of Walsall is typical of many, "I...

grottymonty 14.03.12 12:41pm
Twinnings sponsor Lady Grey-Thompson to come out of retirement for 2012 Olympics

more later. Sory. Anyone seen my coat?...

dvo4fun 14.03.12 12:19pm
Accountant adopts "Lion Fricasse" name to add adventure and excitement to life 0
simonjmr 14.03.12 12:06pm
Astrologer forecasts "Nothing happening at all tomorrow, nada, zilch" for Virgos 0
Nails UK 14.03.12 12:02pm
Nails UK
New police water cannons just an excuse to get around hosepipe ban 0
ianslat 14.03.12 11:51am
Obama impressed with Good Ol' Pal Dave

"We had just the darndest time together, I swear," said President Obama enthusiastically as he waved farewell yesterday to his new best friend, Britain's PM. Standing on Washington Airport's runway...

Drylaw 14.03.12 11:10am
Nuclear catastrophe as physicist attempts to combine pasta with antipasta 2
Smart Alex 14.03.12 10:44am
Irish characters could get third type of incidental music in theme tune shakeup

The current incidental music laws, which govern the types of theme tune that can be played when when any thing or body Irish is seen on TV, could be dramatically widened under new liberalistion moves...

StoopyDeGunt 14.03.12 9:22am
UK Border Agency replaced by moat and drawbridge.

The UK is to scrap its Border Agency and Border Patrol in an effort to save cash. Taking advantage of the nation's island status, the English Channel is to be renamed The Moat. A drawbridge and...

Boutros 14.03.12 1:53am
Home Secretary agrees schoolboy extradition to US

Home Secretary Theresa May has agreed the extradition to the US of 9 year old Justin Beesley of Gosport in Hampshire who was accused earlier this week by US Customs and Immigration Agency of...

Earl Van Dyke 14.03.12 12:15am
Police slammed over missed chance to arrest Jeremy Clarkson

The police have been severely criticised for driving past Jeremy Clarkson's house without stopping to arrest him. During the regular trips to Rebekah Brook's residence to deliver horses and carry out...

apepper 14.03.12 12:05am
Go-between accussed of being liaisy.

What did I do with me coat?...

beau-jolly 14.03.12 12:01am
Dieticians demand ban on 'indoor beefing'

With growing evidence that red meat could be an obstacle to immortality, health experts are urging the government to consider a ban on 'indoor beefing'. Doctor Mallory Hitchens thinks the dangers of...

13.03.12 11:51pm
Man walking dog finds ground-to-air missile installation in woods 0
Scroat 13.03.12 10:35pm
Government to subsidise visitors to London during Olympics

David Cameron has today declared that Banks and Building Societies will be given funding to assist those who plan to stay in Hotels in London during the Olympics., Plans for council house tenants to...

AndyOverhead 13.03.12 9:38pm
Government to insist on strict new driving test for The Undead

Members of the undead community may be forced to retake driving tests after complaints that they drive too slowly and cause major tailbacks, sources have revealed. The recommendation comes as new...

Gary Stanton 13.03.12 9:35pm
Water shortage: Don't see red, use your butt instead

Public advisory – hosepipe ban areas. People living in the hosepipe ban areas are advised to save rainwater by placing their butts under a rainwater spout during any rainfall. Whilst this is an...

weematt 13.03.12 9:13pm
Fiennes to take Newcastle Beauties to South Pole

To mark the 100th anniversary of Scott reaching Antarctica, Sir Ranulph Fiennes is seeking to recruit young women from Newcastle for his next trip to the South Pole. The veteran explorer said...

Mark Gregory 13.03.12 9:00pm
Brooks allowed home after "Coming over all unnecessary" 0
Drylaw 13.03.12 8:58pm
Striking Librarians Bring National Chaos

The nation has been plunged into chaos following a lightning strike today by librarians and library assistants, protesting against public sector spending cuts. The doors of hundreds of libraries...

Mark Gregory 13.03.12 8:37pm
Mark Gregory
Pope Benedict is just an old German guy full of shit, says taxi driver

The Pope is just an old German guy full of shit, according to London taxi driver Bruce Hicks. And Mr Hicks says that the Archbishop of Canterbury is also full of shit. Mr Hicks, who is well-known...

roybland 13.03.12 8:35pm
Lords Resistance Army announces policy shift.

The child brutality and murder community was reported to be ‘in shock’ last night after the surprise announcement of a ‘paradigm shift’ in the operational tactics of the terrorist group...

dammit 13.03.12 7:49pm