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Abu Qatada appointed as ECHR judge to fulfil 'ethnic minority' quota

In a shock decision, radical cleric Abu Qatada has been appointed as a new judge at the European Court of Human Rights in Strasbourg following his recent release on bail. The move was defended by...

Paul 07.02.12 3:00am
Government Upset At Law Being Enforced

Following the release of Abu Qatada from prison Whitehall has accused Judges of protecting the very thing Quatada hopes to destroy. A spokesperson for the Government said, “Listen, Islamic...

Hooch 07.02.12 1:24am
New Formula 1 season: latest gossip

New Formula 1 season: latest gossip, • McLaren to carry out further trial at Dubai GP of last year’s successful new suspension system based on Arab Spring., • Jenson Hamilton expected to beat...

JustSomeBloke 07.02.12 12:04am
"It's a rotten job at times" - Queen stuns TV audience 1
Drylaw 06.02.12 11:31pm
Team GB in crisis as second cyclist fails to fail doping test 0
tedweasel 06.02.12 10:29pm
“You’ll new die alone.” Liverpool’s tribute to Cairo

Liverpool-based ‘Fans but Hooligans Club’ has congratulated their Egyptian counterparts on the stunning score in Cairo earlier this week: “Our lads had held the world record since Hysel in 1985...

dvo4fun 06.02.12 9:09pm
Dawn French can’t swim in the sea anymore.

“Those harpoons are bloody painful’ she explains...

John Ffitch-Rucker 06.02.12 8:44pm
John Ffitch-Rucker
Bradley Wiggins still hopeful of victory in 2010 Tour de France 3
06.02.12 8:38pm
John Ffitch-Rucker
Capello opposes Huhne resignation decision

England coach Fabio Capello says he disagrees with the governments decision to accept the resignation of Chris Huhne as energy secretary. "This will be a big loss to the cabinet and the Lib Dems"...

simonjmr 06.02.12 6:37pm
Plockton Assbeard
Deaf Pensioner finds unexploded bomb in ear

Parts of London were closed yesterday when Elsie Boothroyd, 90, who has been deaf since the Blitz, had a UXB removed from her left ear by bomb disposal experts. After a dog ran off with her usual...

Marko 06.02.12 6:33pm
Shark pedicures 'not without risk' warns HSE

The beauty industry was rocked by fresh controversy yesterday, when health experts warned consumers against the latest trend for shark pedicures. "We have already made consumers aware of the health...

06.02.12 6:31pm
Russia withdraws veto as UN mandate ammended to 'Surrey' 0
tedweasel 06.02.12 6:03pm
Temperatures rise as 'Car Thermometer debate gets heated'

The totally seasonal weather this weekend has seen a shopping centre in Northampton become scene of violence on a scale not seen since August. Disturbances broke out following a conversation that...

Perks 06.02.12 5:22pm
Daily Mail editor confirms his paper's values centre on Fleet Street's ...

traditional absence of values...

roybland 06.02.12 5:21pm
Growing trend in childrens dirty protests against reception teaching methods 0
charlies_hat 06.02.12 4:49pm
Prince William to work in Falkland Island gift shop for six weeks

in an act of national defiance to recent Argentinan rumblings, Prince William will work as an assistant in a Port Stanley gift shop. This 'show of force' will see him selling a range of Falkland...

LostLad 06.02.12 4:43pm
Borrowers shunning credit cards, too hard to furnish their homes with.

They are also too small for tables More soon...

simonjmr 06.02.12 4:22pm
Madonna concert interrupted with scenes of violence 4
Dumbnews 06.02.12 3:40pm
F1 teams receive broken noses in latest bust up

Mclaren the only uninjured after keeping a low profile...

gwalker2805 06.02.12 3:16pm
Song hero demands bonus after he 'made it through the rain' 1
ronseal 06.02.12 2:57pm
Commoner outdoes Queen

Manchester man Ernest Postlethwaite, this year celebrates his 70th year on the throne, outdoing our own Queen Elizabeth by ten years. 91 year old 'Our Ernie' as he is known to locals, has been...

Marko 06.02.12 2:23pm
"Over The Top Rhetoric Could Lead To Apocalyptic Disaster," warns experts. 0
Hooch 06.02.12 2:20pm
Queens new 'do'

Breaking news today as Buckingham Palace announce that Her Royal Majesty Queen Elizabeth is to have a radical new hairstyle to celebrate her 60th Anniversary on the Throne. Celebrity hair-stylist...

Marko 06.02.12 2:01pm
Greece set for the Valentines day Moussaka with Feb 14th chosen as debt deadline 0
Iamthestig 06.02.12 1:58pm
Outed ex pro Robbie Savage calls for tolerance of football's thespians

Footballing macho man Robbie Savage gave 110 per cent every game and never shirked a challenge. He faced down some of the game's hardest men, stood up to Alex Ferguson and even took Stuart Pearce out...

ronseal 06.02.12 1:53pm
Vertically Challenged Giant
Heavy artillery fire in Homs, just a tribute to the Queen claims Assad 0
medici2471 06.02.12 1:51pm
BBC executives surprised at ‘Dancing on Snow’ flop

Scheduling executives this morning have admitted their dismay at the failure of the new ‘Dancing on Snow’ show. The show was intended as a contender to ITV’s ‘Dancing on Ice’ – which was...

kimllfixit 06.02.12 1:28pm
Boost for John Bull as Bristol launches its own bank notes 0
medici2471 06.02.12 1:04pm
EC bureaucrats pass legislation outlawing almost all ways to skin a cat

From March 1st there will be one preferred way and an alternative way which is acceptable under Islamic Law. All remaining ways to skin a cat are banned, as is the popular saying. Richard Littlejohn...

grottymonty 06.02.12 12:51pm
Puppets in drug fuelled orgy - Bill and Ben took Weed in bedroom 0
Marko 06.02.12 12:44pm