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Farmer to pay back subsidies after EU discovers he planted his wife. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 18.11.11 6:34pm
dominic_mcg
MoD spends £600m on consultants to decide who they can legally shoot

The Ministry of Defence has been criticised for wasting £600m on consultants, from a budget that could have been spent on ammunition, rendition flights and new sign posts for Royal Wootton Bassett....

3
18.11.11 6:09pm
Blatter suggests ending Stephen Lawrence trial with a handshake 11
Mark66 18.11.11 5:56pm
Long Distance Clara
MoD equipment purchasers to work at the front line

In a shock move by defence secretary Philip Hammond to improve the quality of equipment procurement, the civil servants that are responsible for purchasing military hardware are to be sent to the...

0
Immunis 18.11.11 5:52pm
Immunis
Blatter to ban black people from wearing poppies. 0
John Ffitch-Rucker 18.11.11 4:55pm
John Ffitch-Rucker
Protestors take over USB...

now how will I connect my printer?...

0
John Ffitch-Rucker 18.11.11 4:53pm
John Ffitch-Rucker
I witness Tyrant Blatter finally run to ground: Foreign Latest

They gathered at dusk in the bars and restaurants of the teeming Zurich bazaar and by midnight President Blatter's HQ had been besieged and his bloodied corpse lay in the dusty street outside. I...

0
Drylaw 18.11.11 3:24pm
Drylaw
Rare Picasso portrait of German Chancellor entitled "Angular Merkel" discovered 0
simonjmr 18.11.11 3:06pm
simonjmr
Protesters admit error of inviting Josie Long to occupied UBS building

The occupiers of the deserted UBS offices admitted they 'should never have invited Josie Long to perform' in the building. Since the announcement, reports of almost half the occupying contingency...

3
ndbrown123 18.11.11 3:04pm
ndbrown123
The "Peston" adopted as the international unit of measurement of smugness

The International Standards Authority has to day confirmed that the Peston will now sit alongside the metre, gram and second as a unit of measure. Absolute Peston is defined as 273kP, the rest of the...

2
grottymonty 18.11.11 2:56pm
Screenie
"Won't pay? Then don't pay" says Treasury's Danny Alexander

Letters have gone out from HMRC to 6000 UK Swiss bank account holders, suspected of contributing to £14bn annual tax avoidance. "This tough no-nonsense letter sets out the options, asking two simple...

5
dvo4fun 18.11.11 2:55pm
dvo4fun
Norfolk County Council outlaws www.silf.xxx 1
grottymonty 18.11.11 2:29pm
kimllfixit
Cambridge and Oxford universities in row race 6
Screenie 18.11.11 2:05pm
Screenie
Vatican launches Home Exorcism Kit

Pope Benedict XVI has given his seal of approval for a special self-exorcism kit that members of the general public can use to tackle their own personal demons. The kit, comprising of bell, book...

14
Ludicity 18.11.11 1:40pm
kimllfixit
Arab League urges Syria stop shooting civilians.."Bombing much more effective" 0
hansens-scar 18.11.11 1:20pm
hansens-scar
Ex MI5 chief Manningham-Buller sends out for pizza during Lords debate 0
hansens-scar 18.11.11 1:15pm
hansens-scar
Blatter holding out for 'golden handshake' claim critics 0
Screenie 18.11.11 1:04pm
Screenie
Research shows Britain's pubs 'full of technocrats'

There may be hope for the ailing UK economy, after researchers found that Britain’s pubs are ‘chock full’ of technocrats. ‘After the resounding success of the new governments in Italy and...

4
The Paper Ostrich 18.11.11 12:48pm
butagirl
Fears grow as Domestos forces Yakult over to the Dark Side 0
grottymonty 18.11.11 12:42pm
grottymonty
Am-Dram society rallies after crossbow atrocity

Swaffham and District Amateur Dramatic Society confirmed today that this year’s performance of Aladdin will go ahead as planned, despite last Thursday’s crossbow rampage by Wishee Washee which...

0
allmyownstunts 18.11.11 12:33pm
allmyownstunts
St Paul’s first letter to the occupiers

Love is patient but I'm losing mine, so I’d love it if you’d all piss off now...

0
button 18.11.11 12:06pm
button
Probiotic protesters occupy St Thomas' hospital. 1
button 18.11.11 11:49am
button
Oxfam commends Nigerian princes for their generosity

Oxfam has publicly given thanks to generous Nigerian princes insistent on sharing vast sums of wealth via online transactions with European professionals. "It's nice to see Africa giving a bit back...

0
Shandy 18.11.11 11:26am
Shandy
Beijing: China To "Have Rhthym" By 2025 0
Textbook 18.11.11 11:17am
Textbook
ASA condemns 'child with serious head injuries' logo for Bears In Need 9
Runestone Cowboy 18.11.11 11:14am
dvo4fun
Lech Walesa the main prize at this years Smash Hits Pole winners party 0
Iamthestig 18.11.11 11:03am
Iamthestig
Latest range of Military weapons to be bio-degradable 0
Iamthestig 18.11.11 11:00am
Iamthestig
Osborne gaff: Virgin '747 Big Ones' payment isn't £millions but two used Jumbos 0
dvo4fun 18.11.11 10:58am
dvo4fun
MoD admits £564m of technical advice did not give more bangs for its bucks 0
Duncan Biscuit 18.11.11 10:41am
Duncan Biscuit
Cameron decides against German accent to tell Merkel ‘For you, the euro is over’ 0
Duncan Biscuit 18.11.11 10:41am
Duncan Biscuit