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White Flag unveiled as new Liberal Party Symbol

‘A new year, a new start, a new flag, but the same old Liberal Party’ announced Nick Clegg, deputy PM and party leader as he unveiled a plain white flag and waved it over his head to the tepid...

1
Immunis 03.01.12 7:42pm
dvo4fun
Memory of 90-91 Ashes Tour finally too much for Atherton to bear. More soon. 1
Al OPecia 03.01.12 7:39pm
dvo4fun
McVities wrappers found beneath seat on French train 0
medici2471 03.01.12 7:28pm
medici2471
Only cab drivers without friends or family to be allowed to hold gun licence

more to follow...

0
medici2471 03.01.12 7:09pm
medici2471
Met police advise that John Terry racisim case will be concluded in 2029 2
charlies_hat 03.01.12 6:41pm
Perks
UK in mourning as police reveal Sandringham body isn’t Fergie 3
Qoxiivi 03.01.12 6:12pm
Al OPecia
Police to investigate "Are shotguns too dangerous to be held by the suicidal?" 1
dvo4fun 03.01.12 6:09pm
Perks
‘We've Had No Complaints’ claim Samaritans after moving call centre offshore 0
Immunis 03.01.12 5:24pm
Immunis
Thrifty couple shave pounds off Virgin space flight by taking 'leftovers soup'

An elderly couple from Dorset are looking forward to a ‘once in a lifetime’ holiday in space, after negotiating a discount for taking their own food. Until now, VirginGalactic has insisted on...

8
03.01.12 4:03pm
nickb
Pathetic Robots Woefully Behind Schedule to Enslave Human Race

Mankind today was yet again able to laugh in the rubbish metal faces of the world's robots as they once more failed to enslave humanity in the previous 12 months., Despite many great advances in...

3
thisisall1word 03.01.12 3:23pm
thisisall1word
Alesha Dixon "Strictly no talent yes"

More transfer window news soon...

0
button 03.01.12 3:18pm
button
Eugenic gardener alarmed as swede displays wedding ring on carrot 0
medici2471 03.01.12 2:17pm
medici2471
Scotland to be given independence until the wind dies down. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 03.01.12 2:02pm
dominic_mcg
Breast implant complaints double in size overnight 0
charlies_hat 03.01.12 12:33pm
charlies_hat
Dry cat food subtly belittles cat 9
nickb 03.01.12 12:25pm
Major Clanger
10 day old Turkey now too tough for main meals, admits Housewife Mrs. N Hubbard

After a long battle trying to maximise the meat life from her 4kg Turkey, Slough Housewife Mrs. N Hubbard has had to face the music and throw her leftovers away to avoid a minor uprising within her...

0
Iamthestig 03.01.12 12:24pm
Iamthestig
Dermatologists beat dentists by the skin of their teeth. 0
kimllfixit 03.01.12 11:55am
kimllfixit
Shadow cabinet deeply worried by call to remove plastic tits. 0
John Ffitch-Rucker 03.01.12 11:35am
John Ffitch-Rucker
The Izzard vs Fry Xmas TV domination battle to continue into New Year 0
simonjmr 03.01.12 11:18am
simonjmr
CMO recommends fake tits to be removed immediately. TOWIE cast worried 0
simonjmr 03.01.12 11:11am
simonjmr
Scientist ‘grows’ sperm in petri dish...

after colleague suddenly opens door to laboratory, causing him to rapidly shut laptop and pull lab coat tight, saying ‘cold in here, isn’t it’?...

2
John Ffitch-Rucker 03.01.12 2:22am
Psycadelic Squirrel
John Lewis finally displays last turkey in the shop 0
Nick McCarr 03.01.12 1:52am
Nick McCarr
Duke of Edinburgh awarded Duke of Edinburgh award

Surprise honour for Duke...

2
apepper 03.01.12 12:59am
gaijintendo
Parents dismayed that "The Iron Lady" is not a sequel to "Iron Giant"

Many children and their parents have left cinemas in disgust after discovering that the new Meryl Streep film is not a sequel to the much loved 1999 Warner Brothers animated feature., One mother,Mrs...

3
virtuallywill 02.01.12 11:53pm
Vertically Challenged Giant
Apple admits their webcams may judge you when not in use 0
gaijintendo 02.01.12 11:50pm
gaijintendo
Miss Marple stymied after alleged murderer refuses to admit responsibility

Noted amateur detective Miss Marple, from St Mary Mead, Downshire, was left somewhat embarrassed and confused after a murder suspect confronted with significant evidence of his guilt refused to...

15
bonjonelson 02.01.12 11:22pm
Vertically Challenged Giant
Ed Miliband gutted that Santa didn't bring him any new policies.

Or a personality., Again...

0
deskpilot3 02.01.12 10:47pm
deskpilot3
Makers of low energy light bulbs take dim view of criticism

More to follow...

0
apepper 02.01.12 10:02pm
apepper
True scale of faulty ego implants revealed

New evidence shows that millions of ego implants inserted into the heads of celebrities and children in recent decades may be faulty. Originally designed to prolong the careers of celebs as their...

4
Des Custard 02.01.12 9:46pm
Username
Knighted Jonathan Ive critical of design of Queen's dubbing sword

Jonathan Ive, Apple's head of design who was knighted in the New Year Honours list, is said to be critical of the design of the ceremonial sword that will be used by the Queen to confer the honour on...

1
roybland 02.01.12 9:39pm
Username