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Traffic warden unearths British battleship in Amazonian rainforest

Vikram Cattermole, an award-winning 45 year old traffic warden, has discovered a British battleship buried in a remote Brazilian rainforest. The WW2 monster, believed to be the missing 40,000 ton...

03.12.12 10:37am
Dick Everyman
HMRC to adjust misleading "Tax doesn't have to be taxing" slogan

"We thought HMRC meant we didn't have to pay tax" said a Amazon/Starbucks/and a few others' spokesman "Because our accountants said the purpose of tax is to tax people, so when HMRC said that tax...

beagle 03.12.12 10:30am
People's daily dispatch had caused two limit shareholders called stocks

East China University of Science and Technology Business School professor Shen Ling in 1996 the stock market from the beginning to the end of December, there has been a dramatic fire scene: the...

03.12.12 10:24am
Dick Everyman
Soldier told to work from home looking for place to park tank 2
Idiot 03.12.12 10:00am
Salford man uses blog to announce change from briefs to boxers...

Blogger Gordon Baines has informed the readers of his blog, The Salford Soapbox, that he has finally made the change from briefs to boxers. The entry for December 3, 2012, suggests the decision...

Tripod 03.12.12 9:36am
Report says decline of Scottish economy ‘like Spain’s, only even more enjoyable’ 0
Duncan Biscuit 03.12.12 9:33am
Duncan Biscuit
Man who sent first text 20 years ago still waiting for reply 0
Duncan Biscuit 03.12.12 9:32am
Duncan Biscuit
News International boss makes his excuses and leaves 0
Duncan Biscuit 03.12.12 9:31am
Duncan Biscuit
Waiting times to assault NHS staff have tripled, says study.

It’s a familiar picture in hospitals across the country. Depressing rooms full of people who have waited up to three hours to launch an unprovoked physical attack on a medical orderly or nurse. ...

nickb 03.12.12 8:57am
News International boss Mockridge quits "to spend more time with his conscience" 0
dvo4fun 03.12.12 8:44am
Russian supremo expresses his legal position through dance : Putin On The Writs

Tired of being misunderstood and misrepresented, Vladimir Putin has declared that next time he addresses the world's media he will let his feet do the talking. er...

ronseal 02.12.12 11:04pm
Sir Lupus
Duchess of Cambridge launches the all new ‘Royal Voice Plan’

The Duchess of Cambridge, in association with her parental family business, Party Pieces has launched an exciting new interactive DVD, the all new ‘Royal Voice Plan.’ The programme offers common...

Dick Everyman 02.12.12 10:53pm
Dick Everyman
Rugby accused of racial discrimination as All Blacks denied victory. 7
MADJEZ 02.12.12 10:35pm
Desperate Dan anxious to distance himself from Paul McCartney. 0
Queen of Tarts 02.12.12 9:24pm
Queen of Tarts
Starbucks to present HMRC with giant cardboard cheque in publicity coup

Starbucks is to counter bad publicity about its corporate greed with a series of meaningful events that will engage the public with their favourite coffee brand, culminating in a photo opportunity...

ronseal 02.12.12 8:36pm
Toy maker admits remodeling Jimmy Savile dolls as Rebekah Brooks was a mistake

With a consignment of two million Jimmy Savile dolls being ordered in August 2011 and delivered in September 2012 in readiness for the Christmas spending season, executives at toy manufacturer...

antharrison 02.12.12 8:22pm
Identify Dr Livingstone and other jungle embedded explorers with the iPresume 0
ronseal 02.12.12 8:00pm
Banana skin slip death man’s family ‘in tears’ over YouTube footage.

The family of a man whose last moments were caught on CCTV say they were ‘literally in tears’ when they saw the footage on YouTube. The video shows the gentleman in the High Street slipping on a...

malgor 02.12.12 7:53pm
Gangnam style "no longer funny", say experts 0
ricky33 02.12.12 7:50pm
Animal kingdom accuses David Attenborough of talking behind their back. 2
Maverick 02.12.12 4:20pm
Laboratoires Garnier to test Arafat remains

Palestinian leaders have chosen Laboratoires Garnier to conduct tests that will confirm whether Yasser Arafat was poisoned with polonium-210 or other lethal substances. ‘We’ve seen their adverts...

DustyBinLaden 02.12.12 12:27pm
Sensational new Poker Mental website announced

Announcing the sensational new Poker Mental online, Come and join our online Poker Mental weekend. Choose your preferred poker and join thousands of others poking a fire to keep the embers...

Not Amused 02.12.12 11:15am
Britain to franchise use of English language to resolve budget deficit

Chancellor George Osborne has unveiled a new plan to get Britain out of its economic hole. After the Conservatives privatised everything they could think of in the 1980s, they have long considered...

harry 02.12.12 9:47am
Climate change denier goes on trail at The Hauge.

Burn him Oh wait, don't burn him think of the omissions. Use the solar powered Electric chair...

Bourbon 02.12.12 9:43am
Leveson findings: the only way is ethics

Delivering his withering report on the standards of the British press, Lord Justice Brian Leveson – ‘Bri’ – said: ‘OMG, what them dodgy papers have been doin’ is bang out of order. I...

Clarky 02.12.12 9:23am
PM speaks: I'd like to talk to you now about another fracking problem 0
Drylaw 01.12.12 8:15pm
British stars triumph at North Korean TV Awards 3
01.12.12 8:12pm
Sports news and weather report to be combined: in New Zealand, it’s all black. 0
sigmund 01.12.12 6:10pm
Flintoff dropped by Jacamo after breaching terms of contract

Freddie Flintoff has been dropped as the big face of Jacamo after losing almost four stone in preparation for his recent professional boxing debut. 'It was not a decision we took lightly.' said a...

Qoxiivi 01.12.12 4:51pm
Government dismiss Fracking report, Leveson not to be implemented

No Fracking way...

virtuallywill 01.12.12 4:47pm