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Depressed mountaineer at rock bottom 8
medici2471 13.01.12 1:38pm
Bletchley Park boffins no nearer to cracking TEXTSPEAK Code say MoD

ITS NOT GR8 :-(...

tedweasel 13.01.12 1:21pm
Domesday Clock To Be Linked To Atomic Clock To Stop Continual Adjustments. 0
rob 13.01.12 1:04pm
Shares down amid nuclear apocalypse rumours 1
hughesroland 13.01.12 1:03pm
Teachers back plans to get rid of under-performing MPs after three months

And not to wait a full five years for a General Electon...

Ian Searle 13.01.12 12:43pm
Major Clanger
US military piss away opportunity for peace 3
Immunis 13.01.12 12:42pm
Major Clanger
Cameron to rethink controversial plans which affect people who vote for him

But will carry on closing libraries and day care centres, cutting the NHS and all the things which affect oiks!...

Ian Searle 13.01.12 12:27pm
Ian Searle
Inventor of Clearasil found guilty of spot fixing 2
jp1885 13.01.12 12:15pm
Fergie 'posed as donor' for undercover orphanage film. Gullibility Oscar likely. 1
dvo4fun 13.01.12 12:08pm
Complaints mount after latest Groupon offer for Dignitas assisted suicide.

A number of complaints have been raised after the latest Groupon discount coupon was published online offering a 70% discount on Dignitas assisted suicide services. Carol Poindexter, from Cardiff,...

bonjonelson 13.01.12 12:05pm
Major Clanger
Slow witted seamstress cottons on 4
button 13.01.12 11:43am
Down in the mouth, admits duck fancier 3
medici2471 13.01.12 11:27am
John Ffitch-Rucker
Adolecesents confused as Lynx 2012 doesn't get them laid

There was widespread confusion among young sex starved teens as new evidence emerged that Lynx's latest God awful toiletry will not in fact guarantee sexual intercourse. There is widespread concern...

Shandy 13.01.12 11:23am
BBC denies biased reporting of bid for Scottish independence from licence fee

The BBC was embroiled in a bitter row last night, after using the same unflattering picture of Alex Salmond in dozens of reports about his bid for Scottish independence. Officials denied the...

13.01.12 11:14am
US Marines in Taliban urination scandal identified by birthmarks 0
MrQ 13.01.12 10:22am
Duchess of York set to launch new Turkish porridge diet 0
Duncan Biscuit 13.01.12 10:06am
Duncan Biscuit
Poor teachers face the sack, Rich ones to get more holidays 0
charlies_hat 13.01.12 10:02am
Fake Tan Man Cameron Heads To Mid-East For A Top Up.....

Wow, whee! folks, his first genuine tan!...

Jesse Bigg 13.01.12 8:37am
Jesse Bigg
Cameron to get rid of poorly performing Education Ministers earlier. More soon. 0
Al OPecia 13.01.12 8:17am
Al OPecia
Tesco share dive reveals true extent of Worrall Thompson's pilfering 0
Boutros 12.01.12 10:50pm
. 0
Sinnick 12.01.12 9:17pm
Paul McCartney Names New Album "Kiss My Black Ass"

Sir Paul McCartney has rejected the advice of his friends, family and personal psychiatrist by giving his new solo record the needlessly provocative title "Kiss My Black Ass". Sir Paul has explained...

@spinal_bap 12.01.12 8:23pm
Tesco price drop 0
button 12.01.12 8:19pm
Leak empties think tank.

“I can’t believe it,” says Professor David Warren, director for the centre right Policy Institute Forum Group. “I checked the tank last night before I went home and it was totally full of...

nickb 12.01.12 8:12pm
Institute of Economic Affairs issues guidelines on low cost infidelity.

The IEA’s new handbook “How to Have an Economic Affair” starts with a choice of illicit partner: “Try not to be attracted to a partner who lives in another city,” the guide advises. With...

nickb 12.01.12 7:52pm
English gymnasts sweep the medals board in All-England Competition 0
brownpaperreporter 12.01.12 7:50pm
'We thought they were on fire' claim US marines 0
jp1885 12.01.12 7:45pm
Username too short for Gravatar shocker

Keen contributer unable to add ironic image to his profile, as his username is a few letters short for Gravatar. "Looks like I'm stuck with the pattern of small polygons", he said today...

MrQ 12.01.12 7:25pm
Scotland separation from UK - Salmond and Sturgeon to mullet over

The plaice for all your fish puns...

Smart Alex 12.01.12 6:23pm
Alex Salmond mistakenly agrees to a Scottish Independence ballet 1
simonjmr 12.01.12 6:08pm