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‘No’ to a drugs free-for-all... 0
Doylem 4 years

Under new government proposals Ministers will no longer be required to seek the advice of scientists when making drug classification policy. Charles Caundle, Minister for Misinformation: “I don’t...

Dyson launch the Spunkmaster 900... 0
Doylem 4 years
Dyson unveil new turbo penis pump in time for Christmas 0
dogwheels 4 years
Angel Gabriel to fight extradition over sex assault claims - 2 32
Mary Evans 4 years

A heavenly envoy of the Lord God Almighty has vowed to fight his proposed extradition to Israel to face trial regarding an alleged sexual assault dating back to 1 BC. The alleged victim, named only...

FHM renames UK's Shopping centres in Xmas lead up 3
simonjmr 4 years

FHM has decided that in the run up to Xmas that they will rename all shopping centres with appropriate mancentric names: The new names are as follow Merry Hell - Birmingham, Murder Hall -...

Dasterdly and Muttley concerned by appearance of Wackyleaks 0
simonjmr 4 years
Extradition calls after Wikileaks releases naughty and nice list. 0
the coarse whisperer 4 years
Bob Ainsworth proposes sweeping changes for drugs, society 5
gaijintendo 4 years

Bob Ainsworth, after advocating the decriminalisation of Drugs has gone on to outline his proposals for a safer Britain. Top changes included the end of speed limits, lowering the consensual age for...

General agreement that Tom Daley's 'World No.1' tag 'a bit misleading' 13
Golgo13 4 years

One of the ten sportsmen and women shortlisted for this year's BBC Sports Personality of the Year, Tom Daley, the world 10-metre platform diving champion, has been hailed as a diving prodigy from an...

Microsoft: “Kinect not breaking down enough”; patch on the way 0
spudgun 4 years [i]Red lights; thing of the past[/i] ? In a move to avoid any possible confusion, Microsoft have assured users that...

Secret Santa to be replaced with Self Santa 0
gaijintendo 4 years

So you don't get a pile of crap from someone you hardly know...

Scots Woman At Asda Checkout Till Says Someone In England Will Pay For It. 0
IABP 4 years
Coalition to burn down Luton and claim insurance in "Solve 2 Problems in 1" plan 3
MC One R 4 years
Bookmakers probe “irregular betting”... 0
Doylem 4 years

The Association of British Bookmakers is investigating ‘irregular betting activity’. “Punters seem to be winning”, said a spokesman for Ladbrokes, “which is both irregular and worrying....

Debenhams cosmetics counter accused of "hostile makeover" on Christmas shoppers 2
MC One R 4 years

Stunned department store shoppers today spoke of the attempted hostile makeover that they were subjected to whilst out Christmas shopping. "It was horrific", said one customer who didn't want to be...

TMS to be re-branded "Wicketleaks" 0
Iscariot 4 years
UK Life Expectancy Falls Slightly in ‘09. 0
DiY 4 years

The Right Honourable Iain Duncan Smith MP, Minister for the DWP welcomes these findings. "Anything that reduces the burden on the pension service can only be good for [The Big] society in general. We...

Iran Grants Leniency to Woman Who Faced Stoning. 0
DiY 4 years

She is to be hanged...

"A tad heavy handed" as Poirot investigates 'Who let off in the lift?' case 0
thackaray 4 years
Research shows that office Xmas party games never result in wild drunken sex. 0
MC One R 4 years
Charades game goes exceptionally well at Society for the Deaf Christmas Party 0
Tristan Shout 4 years

(signs 'more soon')...

Julian Assange's bail problems escalate 4
DiY 4 years

as PayPal, Via and Mastercard refuse to accept payments from his supporters...

Coalition in jeopardy over plans for Christmas Day 4
ianslat 4 years

Reports are emerging from Downing Street that the coalition government is in danger of collapse over disagreements over whom to have Christmas dinner with this year. A leaked memo from David Cameron...

Suicide bomb “probably not a cry for help”, says psychiatrist... 2
Doylem 4 years
Shrien Dewani only bought wife a one way ticket to South Africa receipts show 0
simonjmr 4 years
New Shariah Law soap opera 'Flog Them' to be shown 5
Bismarck 4 years

during the lunchtime slot. 'people are sick of Neighbours' says spokesman...

As 'Poke the Duchess with a stick' fever sweeps Britain 2
Bismarck 4 years

Fergie goes into hiding...

Beer left out of Australian team, headline writers go on strike... 0
Doylem 4 years
Ainsworth: take drugs policy out of the hands of amateur criminals 0
Zadok the second 4 years

and give it to MPs who are the real professionals. More soon...

NRA demand better target training after Florida gunman fails to hit any hostages 1
bonjonelson 4 years

[more soon]...