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Government crackdown on illegal down loads... 0
Dexter 3 years

'in future, feather smugglers will have their lorries impounded', said a Home Office spokesman...

Middle finger length determines severity of 'Up yours' gesture 0
antharrison 3 years

Scientists have discovered that people with particularly long middle fingers are capable of increasing the severity of the traditional gesture of 'Up yours' to 'Fuck you, you lying twat'. The...

Bill Hart diagnosed with Bilharzia 11
riesler 3 years

more appropriate ailments soon?...

Facebook users leave profile unchanged to show solidarity with all causes 2
Dumbnews 3 years
Disgruntled engineer launches WikiFlaws 0
Dumbnews 3 years
Creator of Dilbert, Scott Adams, launches WikiBS 0
Dumbnews 3 years
Estate agent contemplates new career as Lib Dem MP 0
thesheriff 3 years

After years of busking it in residential sales, estate agent Jimmy Gates has decided to re-train as a Liberal Democrat MP. Jimmy explained that business has been slow in the residential property...

China defriended Google after it started hanging with "that slag Taiwan" 0
thesheriff 3 years

China was like way cool with Google and they used to hang out and shit and do lots of shit together but then, like, Google said it didn't like hanging with China and doing shit because it was like...

X-Factor shock as Cheryl Cole fails to 'ABSOLUTELY LOVV' a performance. 0
MADJEZ 3 years

She promises she will 'ABSOLUTElY LOVV Yoow' soon...

Spanish strikers blamed for planes being grounded by ice and snow in UK 0
Mr.3374 3 years
Viewers take to streets after 'I'm a Celebrity' winner u-turns on tuition fees. 0
SingingHinny 3 years
After fires ravage Israel some fear that their special relationship with God is 0
Malcum eggs 3 years
Iranian artist has camera installed up his botty has trouble with shutter speed 1
Malcum eggs 3 years
Call to end Nanny State Mobile Phone Rules. 0
BillyBitzer 3 years

In the wake of the relaxation of working hours regulations for HGV drivers because ”It’s snowing a bit”, an industry spokesman today called of the lifting of “prohibitive rules” regarding...

Leon Jackson to advise Julian Assange on how to go unnoticed. 0
petebrown 3 years

@petebnewsagency...

Support for Spanish air traffic strike fades when flying pickets grounded 0
brownpaperreporter 3 years
FA donation to 3rd world aid consists mostly of sour grapes 0
Trini 3 years
Draconia - a brief guide for visitors 3
sector29 3 years

We often hear the word “Draconian” - normally in relation to rules or laws or budget cuts. But where is Draconia? And how would it be for a holiday destination ? Do the trains run on time ?...

Pensioner wrecks satellitte during marathon phone query with Indian call centre. 10
Basil_B 3 years

Woking pensioner John Woodward was responsible today for causing a telephone signal satellite to break down thanks to a three hour conversation between him and a Mumbai call centre representative...

"Let’s not forget the true meaning of Christmas: the birth of Santa Clause"... 3
Doylem 3 years
Isle of Wight in retrospective bid for 1948 Olympics... 0
Doylem 3 years

“The infrastructure’s already in place”, says spokesman. “We’re quietly confident”...

Revised first-year syllabus at Hamburger University: ‘bun, burger, bun’... 0
Doylem 3 years
"Can we come down yet? Hola?" Spanish pilots await clearance from strikers. 1
allmyownstunts 3 years
Cigarette retailing u-turn 1
riesler 3 years

The Government has decided to ditch plans to force cigarette manufacturers to use plain white packs., The aim was to reduce the appeal of tobacco to young people by restricting the use of attractive...

Muggers, rapists and phaedophiles protest about the idea of sharing cell with MP 0
Basil_B 3 years

Inmates of high secure units all around the country were all left on tender hooks today with the fear of potentialy having to share a cell with MP expense fraudster David Chaytor. ' We may have been...

Paypal bans Wikileaks - Assange furious to lose auction for iPod on eBay 0
Moggsy 3 years
Ken Barlow actor William Roache signs of for another 50 years of Corrie 0
petebrown 3 years

@petebnewsagency...

Israeli burning bushes "just God wanting a serious talk about stuff." 1
MrChigleysAunt 3 years
Town “largely unaffected” by Snow 0
JLD 3 years

The medieval market town of St Albans in Hertfordshire has been largely unaffected by the spell of heavy snow which has hit the UK in the past week. According to local residents, the roads have...

FA chief takes his ball home... 0
Doylem 3 years

Acting Chairman, Roger Burden, has turned down a permanent role as chief of the FA, saying he can no longer work with Fifa. “What did we get for the £15m we spent on our bid? Fuck all, that’s...