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Nicolas Sarkozy confirmed as "world's smallest frog" 0
simonjmr 12.01.12 9:50am
simonjmr
The 100 year collision course with James Corden

In 1910, an British engineer called John Pottersby made a number of predictions about what the world in 2010. How did he do? 10 predictions that Pottersby got right 10 - Squeezy Marmite “The...

12
Newsquelch 12.01.12 9:49am
Newsquelch
Funny names invented to relieve tedium of US campaign, Mitt and Newt confess

Worthy of more later ?...

2
Clarky 12.01.12 9:33am
Perks
Cameron To Sell Off Scotland To McDonalds.......

."The Burghers of Edinburgh are lovely, dear."...

1
Jesse Bigg 12.01.12 9:32am
John Ffitch-Rucker
Ken Loach to direct Happy Feet “ The Heroin Years”

Ken Loach is to direct the sequel to Happy Feet after David Cameron called on the UK film industry to produce more blockbuster movies and less depressing shit about council estates. Cameron said...

3
Gary Stanton 12.01.12 9:30am
Dickens or Shakespeare
Alton Towers unveil new 'Coalition Coaster'

Alton Towers have today unveiled the latest thrill ride in their collection. The 'Coalition Roller Coaster' has been launched as the theme park's most ambitious ride yet with many twist and turns,...

8
Perks 12.01.12 9:15am
Vertically Challenged Giant
Scots to vote on independence from Westminster...

subsidising their free university places, free prescriptions, free elderly care, etc...

2
Smart Alex 12.01.12 9:06am
pere floza
UK to be renamed "The Untied Kingdom". More soon. 0
Al OPecia 12.01.12 8:42am
Al OPecia
Scots independence latest: Tartan Army applies to join NATO 1
Stan 11.01.12 11:13pm
deskpilot3
Cinema-goers excited over 3D version of film about invisible aliens

With sci-fi blockbuster ‘The Darkest Hour’, based on an invasion by hostile aliens who cannot be seen, set to hit the UK’s cinemas this weekend excitement is building amongst film fans, eager...

7
Vertically Challenged Giant 11.01.12 11:02pm
Runestone Cowboy
British film industry urged to focus more on pornography and wizards

Britain's film industry is facing a radical overhaul, as ministers urged studios to stop making arty, elitist guff that can only be understood by philosophy students and focus more on wizards,...

4
11.01.12 10:52pm
dvo4fun
George Michael and Michael Barrymore lined up for Celebrity Bog Browser 0
ronseal 11.01.12 8:14pm
ronseal
Gardener Loses Plot. - 2

Or, if you prefer, Solicitor Loses Will...

44
sredni vashta 11.01.12 7:57pm
Newsquelch
BBC wins in legal bid to film torture, Attenborough keen to narrate 0
irregular apple 11.01.12 7:54pm
irregular apple
Gary Glitter spotted on Greek holiday 0
irregular apple 11.01.12 7:51pm
irregular apple
Coalition urges Brits to select winning numbers for EuroMillions 0
irregular apple 11.01.12 7:50pm
irregular apple
Cameron keen to introduce tax breaks for philistines 0
irregular apple 11.01.12 7:49pm
irregular apple
Tesco security staff wary as hundreds more little chefs fall on hard times

Security staff at Tesco are bracing themselves for a massive shoplifting spree of miniature proportions following reports that hundreds more ‘little chefs’ have fallen on hard times. ‘We are...

14
Qoxiivi 11.01.12 7:43pm
dvo4fun
Psychiatrists say Michael Gove just doesn't add up 0
roybland 11.01.12 7:37pm
roybland
Habitable planets in Milky Way

accidentally eaten by hungry trucker. More soon...

0
John Ffitch-Rucker 11.01.12 6:27pm
John Ffitch-Rucker
Scotland to be released on compassionate grounds

Prime Minister David Cameron has today announced that Scotland is to be released from Britain on the grounds of ill-health. Legal advisers for the country, which was sentenced to be part of Great...

6
ianslat 11.01.12 6:26pm
writinginbsl
Heston Services keen to distance itself from Blumenthal

"We serve simple, basic shite, instead of poncy, expensive pseudo-scientific shite," a spokesman said today...

0
Scroat 11.01.12 6:01pm
Scroat
Little Chef to be known as Nano Chef

little more follows...

0
roybland 11.01.12 5:54pm
roybland
Scottish freedom fighters fail because of 'funny money'

Today, it has emerged, that a group calling themselves the Scottish Transitional Council have returned back to Glasgow following a failed attempt to fight in England to achieve liberation and...

1
Perks 11.01.12 5:47pm
Perks
Silicone implant firm now accused of supplying dodgy false testicles

In a new twist to the ongoing breast implant fiasco, the French firm that made them is facing fresh allegations that it supplied substandard prosthetic testicles to the NHS. Some 20,000 men worldwide...

17
MrQ 11.01.12 5:42pm
writinginbsl
Superdry launch 'brand shy' clothing range

International urban clothing company Superdry has announced a fashion range for customers who are brand shy. 'We recognize that there are some people who prefer not to wear a jacket with our name...

0
roybland 11.01.12 5:04pm
roybland
Iranian nuclear scientists to be issued with plastic Noddy cars.

Iranian nuclear officials have sanctioned the purchase to 300 children’s Noddy cards to counter the threat from magnetic car bombs, suspected of belonging to Mossad or Western intelligence...

0
MrQ 11.01.12 5:04pm
MrQ
‘Scotland, go Independent or be Scuttled’ says Whitehall

Alex Salmond has hit out at the latest proposals from Whitehall to solve the Scottish problem, namely that the country should be either be made independent or towed out to sea and sunk., ‘This is...

0
Immunis 11.01.12 5:02pm
Immunis
Greenham Common Veterans To Train Anti-HS2 Activists......

..Birmingham to Leeds route activists to be trained via a spiritualist...

1
Jesse Bigg 11.01.12 4:59pm
Jesse Bigg
Bull Alex seeks freedom for 'his' herd of cows. Farmer David not concerned.

In an interview, imposing bull Alex has stated his intention to seek independence from Farmer David, allowing him to sell the milk from the herd of prize cows he believes are his. "I have sired...

0
MrQ 11.01.12 4:27pm
MrQ