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Vatican drops Kasper for UK tour 0
Scroat 3 years

The Vatican squad arrived in the UK today without controversial key defender Walter Kasper, who has failed a fitness test. Although fielding a changed line-up, the Vatican side is still headed up by...

Ann Widdecombe to be Beautified during Pope's UK Visit 0
IABP 3 years

It's a miracle...

Elderly pope can't remember what he came into the UK for 1
Genghis Cohen 3 years
Baptism of fire 'dangerous and abusive practice' claims NSPCC 1
dicky37 3 years

[More soon]...

'They were my idea too!' says Clegg of unpopular cuts, trying to look important 0
la maga 3 years
Report says Prison is university of celebrity - turning lags C list to A list 0
ronseal 3 years

As George Michael was admitted to the C list wing of Pentonville Prison, a friend/publicist said it had been a humbling experience., But many prison governors warn that, with rising numbers of red...

Cardinal pulls out of papal visit 0
arrghgarry 3 years

or ,just in time ...

Pope kicks off four-day UK stag do 0
Genghis Cohen 3 years
Concern as papal rider demands consigment of choirboys brought to dressing room 0
Genghis Cohen 3 years
Man starts affair with Tesco automatic self service checkout. 7
Stan Laurel 3 years

Dave Headworth, a 27 year old account manager from Nantwich is a man with a problem. He has fallen hopelessly in love with the voice of the self service checkout at his local Tesco superstore. Dave...

Third world country hosts third rate dictator 1
Sinnick 3 years

At least we had a 2nd rate dictator - Maggie., And what does the Vatican City export ? Medieval doctrines !...

An Irishman walks into a bar ,the dozy bastard . 0
arrghgarry 3 years
Florentine Academia unveils Michelangelo's Ed. 0
euankitson 3 years

The art world is reeling tonight as the Florentine Academia announced and released images of a lost Michelangelo masterpiece: Ed. Deemed by many as a companion piece to his famous David, the Ed...

Louis Vuitton launches new line of bags for sports racquets 0
Dumbnews 3 years
Being the Pope is the new rock and roll says Benedict xvi 0
Basil_B 3 years

Pope Benedict revealed today that becoming the Pope has gone a long way to satisfing a secret desire to becoming the rock star that he always wanted to be. ' From a very young age all I wanted to do...

Tories to Launch New Funfair Feature at Upcoming Annual Conference 5
Jesse Bigg 3 years

A bouncy castle in the shape of a dole queue...

Man With Sandwhich Board Proclaims 'World's End' and '40% off at Subway' 1
Incompletely Hopeless 3 years
Pope condemns men who dress as women 0
antharrison 3 years
"Cuts Will Not Reduce Trooper Numbers" - Promises Vader 0
wolfie 3 years

Beleagured Home Secretary for the Empire, Darth Vader, assured an anxious galaxy of subjugated victims that his harsh public sector cuts will not affect the level of storm trooper oppression and...

Massive Faux Pas as Pregnant Nun Confesses To Being "Just Rather Fat" 0
wolfie 3 years

Controversy reigned today as it was revealed that the "pregnant nun" had just "put on a little weight recently". The horrified ice cream makers stated "We Ice Cream Makers cherish a fundamental...

Stocks edge higher on news of stocks edging higher 0
Dumbnews 3 years
'Chavborgs' to hunt down and kill benefits claimants 0
la maga 3 years

The government has announced plans to add deadly cyborgs to the arsenal it has been building to fight the social evil of claiming benefits. It was Labour who first instituted the secretive program to...

William Hague Releases Sex Tape in Apparent Heterosexuality “Proof” 0
Ablative Fabsolute 3 years

William Hague yesterday announced the release of a marital sex tape amid continuing speculation of improper relations with a young male aid. Speaking in front of assembled journalists, the Foreign...

Reality cheques to be phased out by 2018 and replaced by plastic veracity cards. 0
Ian Searle 3 years
Stiles only doing it to show he's got one,say 2010 England Squad 0
yussle 3 years
Fears of new financial crash as Florida Qur’ans flood global markets 0
tidris1 3 years

Financial markets opened this morning to massive sell-off after an unnamed Florida investor released a surplus of Qur’ans onto the global marketplace, sending the price of holy books everywhere...

French workers outraged at having to strike for two more years. 0
nealdoran 3 years
Boy Using Child As Human Shield Sanctioned By United Nations' Geneva Convention 0
Incompletely Hopeless 3 years

In a designated educational centre earlier today, James Hunt, 13, used John Hofstadter, 12, as a human shield during a paper-throwing campaign, prompting sanctions by the United Nations. "Mr. Hunt...

'Third World' Britains decide not to meet with Medievil religious sect. 1
MADJEZ 3 years

More bickering soon...

"Government Is Like 1984" says Drunk Guy at Party 0
Incompletely Hopeless 3 years