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Two Door Cinema Club shut down by fire inspectors

The Irish indie band were left reeling after fire officers shut them down with immediate effect after an unannounced regulatory inspection on Monday morning., County Down fire safety officer Brendan...

ginty 31.07.12 4:54pm
Sales of vaulting horses up 87,000% after GB bronze 0
BAJDixon 31.07.12 4:34pm
Ye Shiwen Sticks Up Confucius Fingers At Jealous American

Chinese double gold medallist swimmer, Ye Shiwen quoted Confucius today when she replied to American allegations that she was a drugs cheat. With her swollen eyes hidden behind a pair of identikit...

31.07.12 4:13pm
Cavendish admits spoon-work cost him medal

The failure of Mark Cavendish to win Team GB's first gold medal in the road race was again in the spotlight as the cycling team’s full analysis was made public. A puncture at 75 kilometres should...

Actual Size 31.07.12 3:25pm
Police hold man on provocative Tweet 'It's not the winning, but the taking part' 0
pinxit 31.07.12 2:59pm
Team GB rowing medal hope disqualified after being found out of his scull 0
pinxit 31.07.12 2:10pm
Empty seats at Colosseum blamed on Christians not using their full allocation

The Emporer Caesar says he shared Roman frustration at seeing empty seats in Colosseum but he believes organizers will soon improve the situation. The empty-seats problem has lingered beyond the...

Ian Searle 31.07.12 1:20pm
Jaded readers anticipating "drowned horses at water polo" jokes any time now. 1
Maverick 31.07.12 1:12pm
Chinese swimming coach Nan Dri Lone denies drug allegations 0
custard cream 31.07.12 12:15pm
custard cream
Olympic Ceremony docudrama 'not too soon' claims BBC

The BBC has rejected claims that "It's Boyling in here", a docudrama charting the creation of the London 2012 Olympic Opening Ceremony, is being aired too soon after the event. "A week is easily...

NewSuburbanDad 31.07.12 11:53am
UK public phone-in vote to replace "Inadequate Olympic drug tests" for swimmers

more [moaning] soon...

dvo4fun 31.07.12 11:33am
Cash4takingpart opens new London branch 0
tedweasel 31.07.12 11:29am
Designer of Smart Car charged with two counts of irony 2
Smart Alex 31.07.12 11:08am
Hey Jude to become the new national anthem, as words are easier to remember

And it's played more often at large national events...

Iamthestig 31.07.12 10:18am
Depressed magnet actually bi-polar 2
Perks 31.07.12 10:16am
China denies Olympic pool success down to human-dolphin hybrids

The first cheating scandal of the Olympic Games erupted today when China angrily denied accusations made by BBC presenter, Claire Balding, that its six gold medals in the pool have been won by...

Gary Stanton 31.07.12 8:26am
Gary Stanton
Latest on Chinese Olympic Doping scandal, Do Ping denies any wrong doing 0
Iamthestig 31.07.12 8:05am
Large number of empty seats not taken up by our corporate sponsors

Says Speaker of the House of Commons...

tedweasel 31.07.12 7:28am
Chinese swimmer says accusations are "Evin Rude!". 0
Maverick 31.07.12 4:58am
Austerity Hits The Olympics....

Shove ha'penny all the rage...

Jesse Bigg 30.07.12 10:59pm
Jesse Bigg
Bionic man still claiming he's "100% straight" 0
charlies_hat 30.07.12 9:46pm
Armed Forces to take over from Team GB

Amidst reports that Team GB has failed to turn up for the games the Armed Forces have been asked to take over as competitors. A MOD spokesman said, "Following the success of the forces stepping in...

PeterB 30.07.12 9:36pm
Team GB swimmers claim gold in synchronised failure discipline. 0
wallster 30.07.12 9:23pm
More Olympic copyright trouble as Spice Girls turn around and bend over naked 4
Mandy Lifeboat 30.07.12 7:48pm
Mr Target
Flaming East London cauldron marks riots anniversary

"It just seemed a fitting comemoration, said London Mayor", Boris Johnson., More soon...

custard cream 30.07.12 7:27pm
custard cream
LOCOG releases more tickets for Olympic Opening Ceremony 1
bonjonelson 30.07.12 7:00pm
Spectators walk out of women's weightlifting snatch event

Confused spectators have been complaining about being misled by the women's weightlifting event. "I was looking forward to the women's snatch followed by the traditional jerk and clean, what I didn't...

apepper 30.07.12 5:47pm
Queen’s opening ceremony ‘speaking role’ sparks Equity strike

A row has broken out amongst the acting community, after an elderly woman without an equity card took part in a prime-time drama. Known simply as ‘The Queen’, the woman has no history of acting...

30.07.12 5:14pm
Olympics diving competitors to wear pyjamas and retrieve rubber brick 1
seymour totti 30.07.12 4:38pm
custard cream
Military on standby following BBC's extended coverage of Olympic 'non sports'

Rumours are circulating this evening that official Olympic broadcaster, the BBC, may have to call on the assistance of the already beleaguered armed forces to supply emergency presenters to help...

Duff 30.07.12 4:30pm