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Literacee Standards 'Fall Stubbonly Short' says Education Watchdog Ofsted 0
IABP 3 years
Britain gets name check in George Bush book - and not just once! 10
StoopyDeGunt 3 years

Britain has been name checked in former US president George Bush's book. He gets a few details wrong and adopts a slightly patronising tone but he says some nice things about us and seems to know we...

Unknown walk-on star of countless TV shows slips away unnoticed. 6
Stan Laurel 3 years

Tributes have been pouring in following the announcement of the death of Joe “Shady” Fingleton, at the age of 70. A virtual unknown, but rarely off the nation’s television screens during the...

Spare parts for South American Bridges 0
Rowly 3 years

Contact "Spick & Span",,,,,,,,,,>>>>>>Click here to procceed...

European Golfers realise that Ryder Cup is actually Transformer in Disguise 0
Milo Shame 3 years

Colin Montgomerie was rushed to Aberdeen hospital last night with lacerations to throat and chest. Doctors report that he is stable and they hope to see him make a speedy recovery. His housekeeper,...

Agoraphobic man loses Housing benefit that paid for holiday home in own loft 0
Milo Shame 3 years

Yesterday, accommodation officers in Woking stopped the Housing benefit of a man terrified of the outside world who has for the last ten years been able to find some respite every summer in his own...

Burmese landlord angry - says dissident leader left carpets 'in terrible state' 0
Milo Shame 3 years

(more soon)...

Scientists claim Black holes not 'black' just depressed at slump in house prices 0
Milo Shame 3 years

(more soon)...

UK's Religion Propaganda faces cutbacks........... 1
Slartybartfast 3 years

The UK's back to basics attitude to the on going fight against terror has also been hit by the nationwide cutbacks to try and curb the UK's defisit and the world wide resession. A No. 10 spokes...

Fugitive giant 'still at large' 0
dicky37 3 years

[More soon]...

Last non-orange-skinned woman in Hereford dies unmourned 0
Oxbridge 3 years

Kara-Louise Martindale, the last of the small group of women who caused a major scandal in Hereford in 2015 by refusing to turn their skin orange through the use of five layers of make-up has died at...

Surrey man bests imaginary Gordon Ramsay in imaginary slanging match 7
Golgo13 3 years

In a startling reverse (had it not been imaginary), recently made redundant Surbiton householder, Peter Woodburn managed to reduce potty-mouthed celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay to tears, albeit in his...

Spam on Newsbiscuit 2
Mafaking Carwongo 3 years

Special Offer only available up to Christmas Eve!, Order your SPAM now. Discounts for anyone who posts spam. (Not available to employees of Royal Mail)...

Burmese government finally force Aung Suu Kyi to get a job. 2
the coarse whisperer 3 years

In the first high profile case of it's sweeping new welfare reforms the Burmese government today ordered Aung Suu Kyi to leave her home for the first time in fifteen years and find gainful employment...

Recluse gets UK's first doorstep detention sentence 0
roybland 3 years

A bomber sentenced to house arrest under the Terrorism Act is instead starting a two year doorstep detention after it was revealed he was a recluse who never left the house. 'It makes no sense to...

Gordon Ramsay to Host new series of Celebrity Bastard Chef 0
Grover 3 years

http://scienceblogs.com/aardvarchaeology/upload/2010/08/gordon_ramsays_predecessor_sac/gordon_ramsay-747731.jpg, [size=-1]I'm not your fucking mate![/size] Michelin-starred celebrity chef and...

Nick Clegg and British teenagers ‘Distraught’ as Pontin's holiday camps survive 0
flim-flam 3 years

The iconic firm Pontin’s which has provided generations of British families with substandard holiday accommodation up and down the country, has been forced into administration due to a terminal...

Gordon Ramsey to train disadvantaged kids as workplace bullies. 2
the coarse whisperer 3 years

Celebrity chef Gordon Ramsey announced today that he would be taking part in a new reality TV show for Channel 5, which aims to train a team of unemployed 16 to 24 year olds with virtually no middle...

Aung San Suu Kyi shocks crowds with announcement of "quiet night in." 3
J-Bird 3 years

Pro-democracy leader insists that recent obsession with BBC's [i]Strictly Come Dancing[/i] has no part to play in her decision. More soon...

Norway to Open Black Metal Themed Restaurant 0
Grover 3 years

http://satyricon.ws/img/covers/big/1993_dark_medieval_times.jpg Norway is shortly to open a chain of dinner theatre restaurants inspired by Black Metal, the ear-scraping sub-music genre which is the...

How cats lap liquids clue to origin of universe say scientists 6
roybland 3 years
Gove to include tuck shop money as Whitehall to control school cash 0
Basil_B 3 years

Michael Gove was positively bouncing with excitement today after an announcement by the Department of Education stated that they wish to take full control of state school funding in England and more...

Renowned democracy campaigner Aung San Suu Kyi released into prison 0
flim-flam 3 years

A leading pro-democracy leader and liberal pin-up, Aung San Suu Kyi, was today released from house arrest before being transferred to a high security prison dubbed ‘Burma’ The release was...

HMRC try to close off-shore Dogger Bank. 0
Mrblacker 3 years
Search for bicycle pump enters 3rd day 1
Gerontius 3 years

A bicycle pump used to keep the head of Conservative MP Eric Pickles bloated during the day has gone missing from a House of Commons locker, revealed his press secretary yesterday., The MP, who uses...

Bill Bailey: I was a tone-deaf catwalk model 1
Des Custard 3 years

In a candid interview, comedian and musician Bill Bailey has revealed that in his early twenties he was headed for fame as a fashion model. ‘I was tall and slim, with the sort of thick straight...

Student threw fire extinguisher as he hadn’t yet learnt how to let one off 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
School funding centralisation sees Nick Clegg appointed dinner money monitor 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Administrators called in to Pontins check-out after seeing the accommodation 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years
Fire extinguisher riot suspect unlikely to be let off 0
Duncan Biscuit 3 years