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Maths teacher last heard "You'll never catch me going out with a 15 year old" 0
simonjmr 26.09.12 10:06am
French police search for eloped Bride and Groomer 1
charlies_hat 26.09.12 10:06am
Mathis teacher miscalculates answer to differential problem 0
Cinders 26.09.12 9:46am
New Chinese Navy Threat

Defence analysts have noted with alarm the commissioning of the Chinese navy’s new aircraft carrier, Liaoning. In keeping with the current trend, the carrier does not fly aircraft. The Royal Navy...

Cinders 26.09.12 9:35am
Maths teacher proves that 30 goes into 15 loads of times.. 3
misterjingles 26.09.12 9:34am
Queen of Tarts
Wind farmer buys new ex-tractor 7
charlies_hat 26.09.12 9:32am
Queen of Tarts
'We've more personal data than we can actually sell to spammers' say Google

Privacy campaigners have been alarmed at reports that following the success of Google Street View, the company may soon be launching FrontRoom View® 'Individual privacy will always be a priority'...

vertical 26.09.12 9:24am
Romney-designed private jets to have “indoor-outdoor flow, plus pool”

Mitt Romney has unveiled plans to manufacture bespoke private jets that feature French doors opening out to a swimming pool and BBQ area on one wing, and a tennis court and sweeping croquet lawn on...

Yikes 26.09.12 8:51am
Maths teacher argues that she is 15 base 12

[going for most obscure & least funny joke on this]...

Sinnick 26.09.12 8:45am
Midfield Diamond
Police deny snake found in drawer is Piers Morgan 0
custard cream 26.09.12 8:41am
custard cream
Barack Obama Pulls Out Of US Election - "It Just Ain't Worth It"

26.09.12 8:14am
Jamie’s 1-Minute Meals to include cold beans eaten straight from the tin

Chef Jamie Oliver has single-handedly banished our kitchen fears and re-educated our palates. Now his newest publication will include spooning cold baked beans straight from the tin into our mouths,...

DustyBinLaden 26.09.12 8:01am
Woman livid as husband chucks last Woolworth's bag

Imagine waking up to discover your last remaining Woolworth's carrier bag tied up in the bin, housing last night's chicken carcass. Well for Lilian Carter, this ghoulish nightmare became a reality....

kga6 26.09.12 8:00am
Rolling Stones Announce Eagerly Anticipated 2013 "Grim Reaper Tour"

25.09.12 9:58pm
'Dark matter' that's everywhere but no-one knows why is mostly Sue Perkins. 0
Boutros 25.09.12 9:48pm
Ladbrokes odds on Lib Dem leadership put Nick Clegg well behind Abu Hamza...

Nick Clegg said to be seeking extradition to the US too...

deskpilot3 25.09.12 9:22pm
Cable's fulsome praise for Clegg - "He's yellow all the way through". More soon. 0
deskpilot3 25.09.12 9:20pm
Trapped wind farm worker farts at last.


malgor 25.09.12 9:11pm
Solar wind farm ‘in orbit soon’.

British scientists have announced plans to install hundreds of ‘solar wind’-powered turbines in geo-stationary orbits, spread over acres and acres of space. The solar energy harnessed by the...

malgor 25.09.12 8:46pm
Maths teacher "led astray by Apple Maps"

A maths teacher who has been at the centre of a Europe-wide manhunt following his alleged elopement with a young, female pupil has issued a statement indicating that there has been absolutely no...

jamsieoconnor 25.09.12 8:24pm
Downing Street police replaced by prole officers 8
25.09.12 7:31pm
Mitchell Gaff Latest

Government Chief Whip Andrew Mitchell explains., 'I never meant to call the officer a pleb' says Mitchell, 'I simply mistook him for Lib-Dem leader Nick Pleb.'...

Mafaking Carwongo 25.09.12 7:03pm
Mafaking Carwongo
French Police rush to find 15 year old schoolgirl who puts out. 0
MADJEZ 25.09.12 6:59pm
Mathsmaster leads Interpol by 2.73 furlongs in Schoolgirl Virgin Stakes 0
25.09.12 6:57pm
Terry to "sort out the Syria problems" in new UN role

Defensive stalwart John Terry confirmed this week that he would retire from international football to take up a shock new role as UN special envoy to Syria telling reporters it was "untenable" for...

BAJDixon 25.09.12 6:34pm
“Consistently good marks” for run-away teen turn out to be love bites... 1
Tripod 25.09.12 2:01pm
Queen of Tarts
15 divided by 30. 1
wallster 25.09.12 2:01pm
BBC apologises as Gardner admits not having a leg to stand on. 0
medici2471 25.09.12 1:58pm
BBC apologises for refusing to film Queen wrestling wildcats at Balmoral 0
Sir Lupus 25.09.12 1:58pm
Sir Lupus
BBC regrets suggesting that The Queen gave a toss about anyone but herself

not much more later...

virtuallywill 25.09.12 1:55pm