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DVD sales rocket as schools prepare for last week of term 0
SpankyMonkey 4 years
Chipping Norton sounds like a rum place.... 10
ronseal 4 years

You've got: Jeremy Clarkson, Rebecca Wade, Matthew Freud, Elizabeth Murdoch Sounds like the cast of one of those Bergerac mysteries, where every one of the cast has a suspicious background...

Meditation officially declared a waste of time 1
Christopher Frost 4 years
New "Pam filter" feature added by email providers 3
gleedo 4 years

As a result of lobbying from people with friends and relatives called Pam, the big email providers have finally succumbed and added a feature called a "Pam filter". It is seen as a major coup for the...

Police arrest scapegoat, offer inside info for the usual fee. 0
MADJEZ 4 years
Murdoch cancels N.I. advertising. 0
dvo4fun 4 years

Rupert Murdoch will not buy advertising space in N.I. titles for any future NoW apologies. "Not prepared to have name linked with newspapers associated with News International" tweeted the grizzly...

Health charities slam Domino's new 'pizza smoothie' 15
4 years

Public health charities are up in arms following Domino's launch of the 'pizza smoothie'. The drink, which consists of three slices of pizza blended with ice-cream and a banana, is being touted as a...

Rebekah Brooks caught in possession of a hacksaw. More soon. 2
Al OPecia 4 years
Who gave Robbie Williams food poisoning? Police interview 3 million music lovers 1
FraserWords 4 years

More toneless posturing soon...

Mick Hucknell arrested in phone-hacking scandal. 0
be reasonable 4 years

“It’s an easy mistake to make", says a Met. spokesman...

Angry mob of MPs at police station, bangs on the roof of Wade's prison van 0
ronseal 4 years

The angry mob of MPs and cabinet ministers past and present that surrounded Wapping police station showed no sign of disbursing this afternoon, with many baying for the blood of the alleged fraudster...

Clamour for 'Rebekha's Law' grows 3
roybland 4 years

Following the arrest of a notorious red haired woman, public clamour for a 'Rebekha's Law' has grown. 'People have a right to know if there's a redhead living next door,' said a black haired sponsor...

NOTW journalists have all found new roles in GCHQ 0
brownpaperreporter 4 years
Kevin From Eggheads Lands West End Role 0
f0zz 4 years

Kevin Ashman of 'Eggheads' fame will play Brian the Dog in a forthcoming Aldwych production of 'Family Guy: The Musical' "I'm obviously delighted," Mr. Ashman confirmed last night in his trademark...

Ageing rock stars double-team ‘Little Schoolgirl’ 1
Christopher Frost 4 years

Former Rolling Stones bassist Bill Wyman has teamed up with rock ‘n’ roll legend Chuck Berry, to record a cover of the blues classic ‘Good Morning, Little Schoolgirl’. Speaking during an...

Shadow Chancellor denial 0
Bismarck 4 years

After the revelatio0n that well known busker Giles 73 Smith was concieved in a Tesco delicatessan queue, and that actor Michael 234500 Hill was fathered during a game of Monopoly, Ed Balls has...

Newsbiscuit to publish full page apology for today's FP in all newspapers. 4
Al OPecia 4 years
Redheads even less popular, survey finds 0
roybland 4 years
Little interest reported in 'Rebekha's Law' 0
roybland 4 years
Tracy discovers he is not a Dick. 0
arnied 4 years

Thunderdwaws...

Creationists to play Corinthians in Concaf Cup 2
arnied 4 years

a match of biblical proportions is expected with Joseph as the ref...

Chris Morris and David Amess spotted together at Cake Festival 0
Christopher Frost 4 years
Googie Withers 0
virtuallywill 4 years

no more later...

UK in dark as last person switches lights off....... 0
Bismarck 4 years

The satellite image of the UK at night, complete with glowing conurbations, finally disappeared yesterday when the last man out switched off all the lights.A shocked Eric pickles said "Wheres me Pork...

Murdoch announces plans to buy Mumsnet 0
Christopher Frost 4 years
Horse rider denies hacking 1
beau-jolly 4 years

Well its a new angle...

Murdoch Furious When He Discovers The Meaning Of The Word “Sorry” 0
Deimos 4 years

Sources within the Murdoch Empire have explained how Rupert Murdoch flew into a rage yesterday when one of his advisors explained the meaning of the word “Sorry”. James Murdoch explained “It...

Delighted parents complete first uninterrupted conversation since 2004 0
FraserWords 4 years

Delighted parents-of-two Mick and Jane Daffodil last night completed an uninterrupted conversation for the first time since the birth of their eldest son in 2004., An emotional Mrs Daffodil told...

Pop singer Eliza Doolittle to star in Pygmalion 0
Christopher Frost 4 years
Isle of Wight Council to blame for 'everything' High Court rules. 0
EinsteinsGhost 4 years

Isle of Wight Council to blame for ‘everything’ High Court rules. The normally sedate Isle of Wight was waking up this morning to find itself the focus of the worlds media after a High Court...