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Tributes pour in as Old MacDonald 'buys the farm' 0
Immunis 24.12.11 10:26am
Immunis
Government claims economy improving as seagull puts deposit on new car 0
Smart Alex 24.12.11 10:21am
Smart Alex
Economy saved as Chancellor finds sixpence in Christmas Pudding 0
Major Clanger 24.12.11 9:57am
Major Clanger
A Puppy is not just for Christmas. Jamie Olver makes his last till New Years Day 1
Username 24.12.11 9:46am
Major Clanger
Quality Street hit by xmas riots

http://lh4.ggpht.com/_ErYyaC6ivy0/Su4G1UlIZTI/AAAAAAAAJzs/pr_1Ln6gzNg/Quality%20Street%20tin%5B2%5D.jpg, The street synonymous with family values, community celebration and low cost dental caries...

1
nickb 24.12.11 9:44am
Major Clanger
Innocent, law-ignoring scrap metal dealers targeted by ruthless sculptor gang

Police have declared war on a ruthless gang of sculptors who are targeting scrap metal dealers in the South East, after a replaceable heap of metal junk was stolen overnight from a yard in Billericay...

10
Clarky 24.12.11 9:33am
Clarky
Incomplete Headlines Strike Agai 3
Immunis 24.12.11 9:06am
John Ffitch-Rucker
Foreign nurses in Cambridge unexpectedly given Christmas off 0
Perks 24.12.11 8:30am
Perks
Recovering George Michael leaves cottaging hospital. 0
MADJEZ 24.12.11 8:27am
MADJEZ
Prince Philip has breast implant removed

Cover story slips...

0
apepper 24.12.11 8:26am
apepper
Man with stocking fetish arrested for trespassing 0
charlies_hat 24.12.11 7:44am
charlies_hat
Alphaghetti pulled from shelves after found to contain MRSA and TB

Lab still checking for BSE...

2
Smart Alex 24.12.11 7:43am
charlies_hat
Straight man in gay sauna admits he "felt a bit of a dick" 2
grumblechops 24.12.11 1:53am
Nick McCarr
Plato cannot believe it's not butter. More soon. 0
Al OPecia 24.12.11 12:53am
Al OPecia
Cheeselets in surprise resurgance. More soon. 0
Al OPecia 24.12.11 12:50am
Al OPecia
DFS sale signals green shoots of economic recovery

In a surprise move, sofa retailer DFS announced today they are all set to buck the national trend of economic doom and gloom. The peddler of softwood, foam and velour seating confirmed that plans are...

3
Boutros 24.12.11 12:05am
Boutros
Inventor of electric seafood flexes his muscles

More to follow...

2
apepper 23.12.11 11:49pm
FlashArry
BMW link to erectile dysfunction

In research undertaken by the British Medical Association a link between driving a BMW and erectile dysfunction has been positively identified. It is estimated that the condition affects more than...

17
Dick Everyman 23.12.11 11:26pm
nickb
Dog particle found on sofa 0
nickb 23.12.11 11:19pm
nickb
I told you I was Kim Jong il

North Korean dictator pays final tribute to Spike Milligan...

8
Quaz 23.12.11 11:18pm
Quaz
Arne Duncan Axes Mississippi and Louisiana: Fourth Grade Reading Levels Soar

A provision in the much maligned No Child Left Behind Act has helped Arne Duncan, United States Secretary of Education, succeed where Jesus Christ failed. What is particularly remarkable is that...

0
bobo lutz 23.12.11 11:09pm
bobo lutz
Kim Jong-Il to play self in film biopic

North Korean leader Kim Jong-Il, who died earlier this week, is to play himself in a film biopic of his life, state media has announced. The late Great Leader, who was well-known for his...

0
dogwheels 23.12.11 10:17pm
dogwheels
Administrators warn La Senza is at risk from asset strippers 0
bonjonelson 23.12.11 9:03pm
bonjonelson
Scots MP Begbie in trouble again

Scots MP Lex Begbie is in the headlines once again after Network Rail Police were called to escort him from a London/Glasgow train late on Tuesday night. It would appear that Mr Begbie, returning to...

0
Drylaw 23.12.11 8:44pm
Drylaw
George Micheal Christmas re-release "Careless Whisperer". More soon. 1
Al OPecia 23.12.11 8:26pm
iambiscuit
‘True Meaning Of Christmas Forgotten’ Complain Pagans

Pagans have come out in force to complain at what they see as the hi-jacking of their festive period by ‘New-age monotheist bandwagon jumpers’. ‘The 25th of December is our special day’...

7
UnoEye 23.12.11 8:18pm
iambiscuit
Coalition to put Nick Clegg up for adoption

On the day the coalition have decided to look at shortening the adoption process, they have also announced they are putting Nick Clegg on the adoption list. The move comes as Conservative and Liberal...

7
Perks 23.12.11 8:14pm
iambiscuit
Christmas party gets 100 'donkey record books' for dessert after order typo 1
kga6 23.12.11 8:13pm
iambiscuit
Legendary London Bluesman Hounslow Sloane dies of overdose

Blues fans and fellow musicians around the world are tonight paying their respects to former blues legend Hounslow Sloane who died last night. Best known for his 'fare-dodging' style of electrified...

2
Username 23.12.11 8:06pm
Viewers outraged as ‘babestation’ girl manages to look sexy.

There were thousands of complaints to Ofcom yesterday after a ‘babestation’ girl shocked and dismayed viewers by actually looking vaguely alluring. One viewer, Wayne Kerr, 37, from Nottingham...

0
John Ffitch-Rucker 23.12.11 7:54pm
John Ffitch-Rucker