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'Supercop' says rioters suffer from low self-esteem 0
roybland 4 years
Shop looter says lessons learned, humblest day of life, time to move on 1
ronseal 4 years
Spanish bull kills third victim - a cow was quoted asking "What's his beef?" 0
DavidEllisKent 4 years

On taking stock of the situation (*snort*), whoever called the bull "Mouse" needs to wear a sign around their neck proclaiming "I am Number 4"...

Driver spotted using two mobile phones behind wheel is banned for 12 months..... 0
DavidEllisKent 4 years

and is now a semi-finalist on Britain's Got Talent. Simon Cowell would like to see him using five phones and an Ipad, whilst driving backwards up a one way street at 70mph if he is to make it to the...

Collective Punishment for Rioters. Councils are 'Up For It'. 0
Dun Dunkin 4 years

Councils will evict a whole housing estate or block of flats and reduce it to rubble if one person living there is found to have taken part in the riots...

Milliband dismisses 'Boris's broom' shaped reflex hammer as knee-jerk gimmickry. 0
spoole2112 4 years

The Prime Minister's latest novel (and possibly hurriedly drafted) attempt to address some of the 'sick in our society' was met with a mixtue of bemusement and sheer disbelief by many in Parliament...

Bergerac critisized as "initially standing back and observing" Jersey attacks 0
charlies_hat 4 years
Aftermath: Where did the looters go? 0
Mr McDonald 4 years

In the week following the riots that began in Tottenham last weekend, police and community leaders have united to praise the rapid decrease in street crime, robbery and arson. In the scramble to...

God confirms conversion to Islam 5
Mrblacker 4 years

In a move that's likely to cause more trouble than good, God, Founder and CEO of Christianity Inc, confirmed he's to leave the family firm and take up a position with a rival religion. In a...

Furniture shop arsonist "doesn't need to pay for 5 years" 1
Laughingstock 4 years

despite no credit check being made...

Satan Branded ‘Neighbour From Hell’ 6
UnoEye 4 years

The comfortable suburban living room of elderly couple Jack and Edith is silent except the ticking of the mantelpiece clock. ‘It’s the music that gets me’ says Jack finally ‘Rock and Roll...

Three England Football Stars Found With Yellow Flowering Agricultural Crop... 0
William Pumpton 4 years

Police say it was Rape...

Daily Mail reader says Britain's covetousness was once 'the envy of the world' 0
ronseal 4 years
QPR fans charged 20p to take a leak. 4
rebel not taken 4 years

Long suffering QPR fans are being charged 20p by their billionaire owners to spend a penny in the newly refurbished toilets. Supporters flooded into the ground ahead of the opening Premier League...

M'blud Starkey speak da truth, innit 1
ianslat 4 years
To boost ratings, Olympic athletes to be randomnly picked from the spectators 1
Dumbnews 4 years
Tea Party expels activist found awake, smelling coffee, reading writing on wall 5
FraserWords 4 years

Leading Tea Party activist Randy Shitforbrains was last night sensationally expelled from the movement., In a statement, a spokesman said Shitforbrains had been seen reading some writing he found...

All the world's knowledge now available from YouTube tutorials 0
Dumbnews 4 years
Qadaffi diagnosed with Prima Donna Syndrome 0
Dumbnews 4 years
Oh its good this isnt it?Sunday see their all still in bed. 4
Debs 4 years

Like it! But could it be more topical?...

Betting firms collapse as Indian cricketers retire on winnings 2
Des Custard 4 years

Within hours of England’s emphatic series win over cricket world champions India, several major betting firms have called in the administrators after Indian players collected their winnings. While...

It's not news but... 8
Qoxiivi 4 years

Debs, do you want to stop clogging up this forum for original submitter-written satire with old jokes that everyone's heard before? You're turning it into an episode of fucking Bullseye...

Rioters denounce 'Americanisation' of British way of rioting 4
roybland 4 years

'It's another deplorable Americanisation of our traditional British way of doing stuff - especially free stuff,' says fourteen -year-old Tottenham rioter Zac (two Sony flat screens and a bag of...

Toyah & A-ha CD vanishes It's a mystery..I've been hunting high and low says man 0
jut1972 4 years
Rastamouse tells David Starkey "yo patwa no eyrie mon no makin a bad ting good" 0
jut1972 4 years
This week on Radio 4 2
greg various 4 years

Gardeners’ Question Time: Our panel of experts answer the frequently asked question, what’s worse, a bunch of rioters ransacking your allotment or cabbage root fly. Women’s Hour: investigates...

U16s mobile phone ban - 2 cans and a piece of string ok. 0
JoJo 4 years

In the wake of the recent rioting that swept across parts of England, the government intends to outline legislation to restrict the use of mobile phones by the under 16s. A government spokesman said...

Zero Tolerance 0
JoJo 4 years

RAF continue to pound targets in Peckham. Hague "As long as it takes"...

Camerons cuts programme driven by Propaganda 0
jut1972 4 years

Yes, I am a fan of the 80s German electronic band, he said. But their 3 step cuts programme wasn't deep enough or fast enough and a sad reflection on how German attitudes have softened since their...

David Starkey to star in The Black and Chav Minstrel Show 0
greg various 4 years