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UK Economy Booms Again as World Goes Mad for British Easter Eggs

George Osborne was celebrating yesterday as figures were released showing a complete turnaround for the British economy thanks to international orders for British Easter eggs and related services...

james_patching_1 27.03.13 11:36am
"FAB" says Ed as he recommends big brother David for job on Thunderbird 5 0
Nowherefast 27.03.13 11:27am
Eddie Mair interviews Usain Bolt, "You're a hasty piece of work, aren't you?"

More even sooner than you'd think...

Walter Eagle 27.03.13 10:29am
Walter Eagle
Eddie Mair interviews Nigella Lawson "You're a tasty piece of work, aren't you?"

More finger-sucking, eye-flashing, pouting news soon...

Walter Eagle 27.03.13 10:28am
Walter Eagle
Eddie Mair interviews Joanna Lumley, "You're a Patsy piece of work, aren't you?"

More fabulous news soon...

Walter Eagle 27.03.13 10:26am
Walter Eagle
Remains of King Alfred the Great found, in ‘exceedingly’ lucky break...

The remains of King Alfred the Great have been disinterred from an unmarked grave at St Bartholomew's Church in Winchester. The momentous find was announced by Brian Enderby, Head of Hampshire’s...

Tripod 27.03.13 9:58am
Ed Miliband finally get's own room after David moves out

With his brother David stepping down as a MP to take up a charitable post in New York, Ed Miliband is said to be ecstatic that the bedroom they share will soon be all his. The Labour Leader has...

Hooch 27.03.13 2:07am
All news to be covered from Kate Middletons point of view 0
Hooch 27.03.13 1:44am
David Milliband to run charity 'My brother's a cock with a better job than me' 0
MADJEZ 27.03.13 1:12am
Tricorn hats the real cause of French Revolution 4
Dick Everyman 26.03.13 11:49pm
Dick Everyman
Waitrose launch Pippa Middleton's 'Thursday Last Suppers'

The editor of Waitrose magazine has announced that Pippa Middleton is to write a recipe column called 'Thursday Last Suppers' to complement her 'Pippa's Friday Night Feasts', the first of which will...

roybland 26.03.13 11:49pm
“Failing hospitals to be named", says Hunt. “We’ll call them Duffields"

Bed pan tip to Squudge ;0)...

Dick Everyman 26.03.13 11:46pm
Dick Everyman
Paywall for Newsbiscuit

In line with other publications, Newsbiscuit is to institute a paywall. Readers of the Newsbiscuit website will get 2 submissions per month for free, then pay for as much as £9.99 a month for phone...

Iscariot 26.03.13 11:18pm
story deleted

message received.. bye bye...

26.03.13 11:16pm
Big Ben
Panic In Tory HQ As Milliband Quits

- until they realise it's the [i]other[/i] one, not the swivel-eyed, Chris-Eubank-soundalike one...

Titus 26.03.13 11:14pm
David Miliband in 'no-strings' move to International Rescue... 0
Tripod 26.03.13 11:11pm
David Miliband to replace Parker in International Rescue... 0
Tripod 26.03.13 10:59pm
“Failing hospitals to be named", says Hunt. “We’ll call them all Mid-Staffs”... 3
Tripod 26.03.13 10:21pm
“Failing hospitals to be named", says Hunt. “We’ll call them same-joke" 0
Bourbon 26.03.13 10:14pm
“Failing hospitals to be named", says Hunt. “We’ll call them Cecil" 0
sponge finger 26.03.13 10:13pm
sponge finger
“Failing hospitals to be named", says Hunt. “We’ll call them shit" 0
Squudge 26.03.13 10:12pm
“Failing hospitals to be named", says Hunt. “We’ll call them morgues" 0
Squudge 26.03.13 10:11pm
Tattoo parlours to be allowed to carry out minor amputations

In the latest cost-cutting initiative to be rolled out by the NHS, men can now go to their local tattoo parlour for removal of minor body parts that are beyond medical intervention. "We feel there...

sydalg 26.03.13 9:51pm
Paddy Berzinski
Jeremy Hunt: Revised nurse training to "outlaw smothering patients with pillows"

more (radical proposals) soon...

dvo4fun 26.03.13 9:31pm
Follicly-challenged Yorkshireman buys twig 7
Smart Alex 26.03.13 8:59pm
Flash! Aa-aaaa!
May shapes up in food crisis

In light of the recent triangular flapjack furore, and in a populist move to attract the Essex vote, the government is to introduce the Dangerous Triangular Food Act and promises not to fudge the...

Reg Herring 26.03.13 8:58pm
Flash! Aa-aaaa!
Some households in north of England still without Royal update warn Met Office

Thousands of homes around the UK have been without an update on the Duchess of Cambridge’s health for several hours say emergency services., Severe weather has left some homes in the north of...

Gerontius 26.03.13 8:44pm
Al OPecia
WWII American pilots have safety concerns over Jap flak 0
Smart Alex 26.03.13 7:20pm
Smart Alex
School Catering Staff Now Required To Wear Protective Flapjackets 0
Titus 26.03.13 6:28pm
Cypriots unworried by pointy flapjacks but do have concerns over Angular Merkel

More contrived news soon...

Smart Alex 26.03.13 6:26pm